At what age do people 'wake up'? (page 6)

Crisis of Conscience

I woke up at 28 years of age. I progressed pretty rapidly in declining my service amount of any sort. I believe all the reading I did as well as seeking therapy helped my progress to break free from the "truth" mentally. I am also now realizing or at least feeling that subconsciously perhaps I never really believed any of it, and that made the mental release somewhat simpler. The guilty feelings passed rather quickly.

A few years later, I am still attending meetings in support of my wife, but miss as many as I can (which lately has been a lot ).

The next goal is to drop that completely. But timing is everything, and so far things are looking up.

As far as an age in general though, I have noticed a number of people my age, early thirties, begin to wake up. But that is just personally. I wouldn't make that the magic age.

In my case, it took me finally really feeling like an adult, and then the questioning began and the blinders fell off, almost instantly.

That can happen at any age though.

CoC

inbetween

It may not be a certain age, it can be a traumatic event, that helps start thinking.

For me, it was different, I always wanted to look at facts, avoid being close minded. However, most research i did, was in WT -library...still I found somethings always questionable, like blaming 1975 fiasco on the brothers, or believing that tigers, sharks etc in paradise will eat straw...

In my case, it was this open mindset, that when I stumbled across facts regarding blood policy I just soaked all the information up like a dry spounge, the beginning of a fast, depressing but also exciting road, to where I stand now after three years as an agnostic, who formally is still in because of family....

I remember, I always was curious for information, even pre internet, I looked secretly in a book written by a former member (very popular in my area, many book stores displayed it in the early nineties) but he wrote lies and half-truths, which confirmed by belief in the org, rather than destroyed it.

Well, but if you really appreciate facts, sooner or later, the time comes and they will shine through myth. Point is, a person has to be ready to accept it even if it may go against wishful thinking...

jwfacts

I wrote the following poem when at Bethel, at about 21. So I guess I was already waking up. Actually, even as a teen I doubted, which is why I pioneered; to stop the doubts. Then I went to Bethel; maybe that would stop the doubts. Shame that I did not have the strength to confront the doubts then, and wait till I was midway through my life at 35 to stop going to meetings.

Is God there?

There! Where’s ‘there’?

The edge of space,

Wherever that may be,

Or a different dimension

That transcends our own,

And if so, does it transcend time,

Such that God is every place

And every time simultaneously?

And if he is, why isn’t he here?

And if he isn’t every where and every time

But just up there, somewhere

Then where is he?

We’d like to know how to worship,

Whether all beliefs are right,

Or just one,

If we can do what we like

Or whether God even cares.

If God cares

Then we’d like to know

Why the hell he doesn’t show

And why there’s many answers

For just one question

And for not one of those

Is a proof; and so

Is this in itself a proof

That there’s no one anywhere

Out there to guide and care

If that’s so we’d like to know

Where we’re from and where we go

And does death’s grip end the show.

Fernando

I guess for many the "authentic self" or identity (as per Steven Hassan) is always awake, but badly suppressed and subjugated by religion and the resulting "cult self" or identity.

LongHairGal

Splash:

I think there are some people in the religion who never wake up if you are referring to actually leaving. While some may have a passing thought that something is wrong, it is quickly dismissed from their minds. If the passing thought is traumatic enough, it will trigger a rude awakening.

But, just because somebody has a rude awakening doesn't mean they will leave. It depends on what the rude awakening is. I had a few. The first was about their serious issues about women and "modesty" and people tattling. Even though this hurt and was an indication that all was not well in this spiritual "paradise", in time I put it from my mind because I bought into the nonsense about "imperfection" and "forgiveness". I also had later rude awakenings about the religion's stand against college and careers. While this knowledge changed my attitude and behavior towards certain people and made me cautious, it wasn't enough to make me leave....yet.

However, if the rude awakenings are about the core beliefs, prophecies or serious disillusionment because of injustice or corruption that can't be ignored then some will leave the religion. Everybody's case is different and some have a lot at stake (family, business) and they can't just leave, even though they want to.

In my case, it was the 1995 changed teaching on generation that did it for me. I never felt the same after that. The religion should have packed it in because they lost all credibility as far as I was concerned. But, when I learned the religion's scandals on the internet in 2000, it really was over.

Emery

I began to wake up at 25... emotionally and mentally out now at 26 (currently fading). Instinctively, the subject of the faithful and discreet slave never settled right with me. I prayed and tossed this bad feeling away as a lack of faith. I always promised myself that one day I would sit down and personally research the doctrine but I always procrastinated in doing so....thank goodness my procrastination didn't take many more years out of my life.

What I have noticed is that witnesses either have to have the intellectual curiousity, or have to experience a considerable amount of disappointment to come to TTATT. A substitue CO from the neighboring hall not too long ago was DF'd for comitting "emotional adultery" with a married pioneer sister. From the rumors I now hear, he strongly disagreed with the decision of the BOE (since they had no evidence against him) and now has developed an "apostate-like attitude". This former CO tho, was such a over zealous asshole, very pharisaical, and highly critical of the brothers at his hall.

My brother-in-law was a huge YES man also. Until recently he was holding a ministerial servant position...he then had some of his priviledges taken away because he did work for a church. Now he's waking up, not fully but he's getting there. It takes a dramatic emotional ass kicking to have many people wake up from this corporate faith. Until something dramatic happens, you can't really nudge them with facts or evidence against the Society.

C.O.B.E.Beef

It happened for me in my early 30's.

Having been born in the religion, the concept that JWs are right even when they are wrong has been completely embedded in my little brain. Any time that I had doubts about the religion, I would rationalize that these issues were just objects in the darkness ahead and as the light got brighter I would understand them better.

However, when we had our first child, something very natural inside of me overpowered that conditioning and convinced me that this kind of reasoning betrays my responsibility as a parent. It would be dishonest for me to teach something as a fact to my children , if I could only prop up the theology by ignoring inconsistencies and demonizing any opposing views. It seemed like an unfair thing to do to kids.

So, having kids caused me to rethink my religious upbringing. They have blessed me with mental freedom and Im working hard to return the favor...

raymond frantz

I saw faults from the a young age ,I remember as a teeneger arguing with my parents why is it that we want people to listen to our message but we won't listen to them .Nevertheless it wasn't until I was in my late 30's I started seeing the problem .To much cognitive dissonance .I cam across the letter of James book ,one of the best JW books in my opinion .i could not undestant how a vile apostate write such a beutiful book .The internet had definetely awaken many

Dovakin

I would have to say 13, a loss in the family non-jw and the lack of concern from "friends", of which I truly felt i had none at the time. Depression from being ignored lasted for years. As a born in it was especially hard for me, to this day I still feel scarred. The love and compasion that was always spoken of at the kh I never felt.

EmptyInside

I've had doubts all along being raised in the religion. But,I finally,"woke up" in my mid-thirties. I was the last of my circle of friends to leave. Some left in their late teens and early 20's,but they still believed to some extent. And a couple of other friends left in their thirties too,after doing research and wanting more for their children.

That may be a key too. It's one thing to go through the motions on your own. But,it's another thing to drag kids to meetings and conventions,when one doesn't fully believe themselves.

At what age do people 'wake up'?

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