The athiests will tell you needing or creating a god is being weak-minded.
OH! RVW None of the atheists on the board have said any such thing, and neither will I.
I am an atheist. I'm really not into philosophy because I find it a lot like religion. There are many different thoughts and good arguments for and against all. But I know that many here have been helped quite a bit and find a lot of meaning in it. But if I were to advise you on something enlightening to read or take a class on, I'd recommend Culutral Anthropology. It is such an eye opener. We live in a world that was crafted from Judea/Christian values, and we tend to think those are good values. But learn about other cultures and their history. Learn about their religions and morals. See how relative it all is to the environment a group is living in. Learn to not be ethnocentric.
For instance, we grew up in a world where sexual morality meant certain things. There is flexibility there, but number of past sexual partners, status of relationships, number of current partners all play a role. So we may tend to think that love is necessary, monogomy a no brainer, and being with a lot of people is a character flaw. But then you look at other cultures who view sex very differently, and they are actually MORAL in their culture to not follow these rules, because it is what is expected of their culture, and it expands your mind. Why is THIS version of morality and gods correct? When you really search to see how others have struggled with questions and answers, you get a bigger picture and better understanding of what compels some to believe. When you see how big the world really is, including its history, it becomes more unlikely that these people right here actually stumbled on some truth.
I don't know what you will conclude in the end, but you owe it to yourself to delve deeply into it. Brush up on your critical thinking skills and listen to many viewpoints. Break them down. Rip them apart. At the other end you will know you came to your conclusion after educating yourself to how people work. The great thing is that no decision is etched in stone. As you move forward and new evidence or unfamiliar thoughts are thrown at you, you simply reeavaluate where you stand and see if it is still sound. I won't tell you to pray or have faith or pray for faith. Faith is not necessary, because it has a tendency to dismiss anything that doesn't flush with it. I will tell you to read, read, read and learn, learn, learn and think, think, think. It takes courage. It really does. Tearing apart deeply held ideas is scary, but if they are sound, they will survive.
NC