I was HAPPY as a JW, how did I get here?

by MC RubberMallet 85 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  steve2

  I can say that all alcoholics are miserable despite any exterior appearances to the contrary.

  Sab, with respect, this kind of sweeping, absolutist and dogmatic statement would be readily "at home" in Watchtower literature. E.g., "Brothers and sisters, be assured that all the churches of Christendom are miserable despite any exterior appearance to the contrary because, unlike us, they don't have the truth".

  Sweeping, absolutist and dogmatic.

  As newchapter said, it is about validating the varied experiences people have had as JWs: Yes, undeniably and irrefutably people have been seriously and tragically harmed by the Watchtower organization. But not every single JW or family of JWs has ended up personally unhappy or tragic. And that is not to defend this organization but to acknowledge not everyone has or has had the same experience.

  The question of whether or not you as a JW were happy or otherwise is an important one. Yes, it is nowhere near the full and total story and it does not justify the Watchtower's atrocious policies. However, to sweepingly deny that anyone could have ever been conceivably happy in the organization is to commit the self-same error of thinking advanced by the Watchtower in its ignorantly sweeping statements about "genuine" happiness being the sole preserve of Jehovah's people.
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  disillusioned1

  Finally Awake, It would be hard. I almost have my place paid for. I put a doublewide on family land... so I can't sell it. I could rent it but not sure I would get enough to start over somewhere else. Rent is a lot higher other places than here. I just became a board member for Habitat for Humanity. I'm hoping to meet people that way. And you are right, it is a small town in Western North Carolina, where everyone knows everyone else mostly because they go to church together.

  It must have been rough moving to a town where you knew no one. I grew up here and went to the one high school. I know people but they are mostly just acquaintances.
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  finally awake

  I moved to this place for work - I wanted the job and they commanded me to live here LOL. It's not a bad place, and I actually rather like it. You are in tough spot since you can't sell. I love that you are involved with Habitat. We don't have a group in our county, I would love to get involved because I think it's a great program. I take it you are not married and don't have young kids at home?
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  disillusioned1

  No I am divorced and my son is 24 and living about an hour away in Charlotte. I am just starting to get involved with Habitat. 2 women I used to work with are on the board and they recommended me. Hopefully I can help others and make friends at the same time.
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  Botzwana

  Yeah Sabs.....Slow down man.
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  whathappened

  Glander, your story is very interesting. I am happy you are out and have made a success of your life. Your wife and kids came out also?

  MC Rubber Mallet: Please tell us more. What caused you to come here???
• 

  Bungi Bill

  MCRubberMallet,

  I have never seen an actual recruitment poster for the JWs - but your story would have to come the closest to it!

  Like many others here, I am very interested in hearing more.

  The closest that I ever came to what you are describing was when I was "New in the Truth", and everybody had been constantly telling me what happy people Jehovahs Witnesses were. I figured that there must be a point that I was missing somewhere, so I just went along with the flow and made out that I, too, was just as happy as they said that they were. This charade continued until the novelty wore off - which didn't take too long!

  Bill.
• 

  MC RubberMallet

  I entered a pop and locking battle. I lost. When I lost, I thought. why would God allow this to happen? Then everything came down like a house of cards. Now I'm here.

  No, but seriously, I really apologize for the delay. I will post tomorrow afternoon. Long day in the saga we call life. Lol.

  Oh, and I read all the comments. Thanks fams!
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  rip van winkle

  We're all waiting.........................................................................................................

  and waiting...........................................................

  See you in the morrow, EMCEE Rubbermallet!
• 

  sabastious

  Sab, with respect, this kind of sweeping, absolutist and dogmatic statement would be readily "at home" in Watchtower literature. E.g., "Brothers and sisters, be assured that all the churches of Christendom are miserable despite any exterior appearance to the contrary because, unlike us, they don't have the truth".

  So you are saying it's sometimes OK to be an alcoholic? Because I don't think you believe that, because it's never OK and will always serve to destroy your life and your relationships. What keeps an alcoholic an alcoholic ? There are a variety of factors, but a leading one is that of enablement. One of the first steps out of alcoholism is to identify who in your life is enabling your behavior (and who YOU are enabling yourself). These are called "drinking buddies." They are people who are only interested in your friendship because you drink with them. This is exactly how the JW's operate. They need to artificially reinforce each other so that they don't fall away. A dysfunctional drinking buddy will focus on the "good times" that alcoholism has brought to the table. They will focus on the times of happiness and not the utter horror and unnecessary suffering in the name of alcohol.

  Sweeping, absolutist and dogmatic.

  Says you, who is being dogmatic about your opinion on "tolerance", which is grossly misguided in this case.

  The question of whether or not you as a JW were happy or otherwise is an important one. Yes, it is nowhere near the full and total story and it does not justify the Watchtower's atrocious policies. However, to sweepingly deny that anyone could have ever been conceivably happy in the organization is to commit the self-same error of thinking advanced by the Watchtower in its ignorantly sweeping statements about "genuine" happiness being the sole preserve of Jehovah's people.

  I disagree, just like alcholics the Witnesses desperately grasp onto any happiness even remotely connected to the dysfunctional group activities. Dysfunction cannot harbor happiness it can only conceal it. Now I am not saying we should look back at our happy memories as Witnesses and discount them, don't get me wrong, but they should be put in the proper perspective. From an objective perspective they are valueless and counterproductive because they are just enabling a dysfunctional and destructive environment that ends in pain and death. From a personal standpoint, however, they are cherished and should be, but it's a trap to call them REAL and of objective value to the world. The experiences were real, and we developed sentimentalities over them, but objectively they had no value to the world, they only had value for the people involved. Just like drinking buddies.

  -Sab