The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith 336 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  Listener

  That's an interesting comment that your sister made and I am glad that she is personally aware of this because whether she chooses to stay or leave if she can identify these problems then she is not devoted to the GB and is unlikely to follow their lead in all things.

  The March 2012 study Watchtower is making an attempt to deal with internal wrongdoing. They tend to explain it away as just misunderstandings. This is from the study article titled "For those loving Jehovah there is no stumblying block

  ...For example,he recognizes that what seems to be an injustice to us may be a misinterpretation or a misunderstanding on our part. Jesus will handle congregation needs perfectly and at the right time. Thus, we should not allow the actions or decisions of any fellow Christian to become stumbling blocks to us.."

  The logic in the article is so typically bad.

  The organization just tries to push things under the carpet and pretend that injustices are not real but even though they are not real Jesus will deal with the problems at some unspecified time and in some unspecified way. Which simply means that the org. has no intention of dealing with these problems themselves.
• 

  WinstonSmith

  Both my sister, and our friend Sister T have recently had really bad experiences with the elders. Experiences where they went for help, seeking shelter from the wind etc, and in return got smashed. My sister and her husband have had issues for a while, and the elders response was to say "Well you can't be doing everything we told you to do because if you were you wouldn't still be having problems." Then proceeded to threaten them with losing their pioneer and MS status. Our friend Sister T asked an elder to keep an eye on her and remember her in his prayers because she got drunk ONCE, and a few days later was called into a judicial committee.

  It seems from the reports here on JWN from the KM schools that the powers that be are clamping down on everything and legalism is taking front and centre. The results are seen in the harsh treatment being meted out to those who err or even seek help. I think that this attitude will push more people out than any new light or TTATT. Maybe the WTS has figured this out and, like a true bully / abusive partner is flipping the blame onto the innocent party. Taking advantage of their captive and fear filled minds. Guilt, guilt, guilt. The article Listener mentioned above and the one just the other weekend about how we react to counsel from the elders all put the blame on the the publisher involved. We are told that we should be forgiving of the elders and remember they are only human and make mistakes, yet this same attitude is not extended to the publishers. To those who are honest hearted, this attitude will scratch against the blackboard of their sense of justice and may be just what they ned to help them wake up.

  I think the WTS is finding itself in the difficult position of wanting to distance itself from individual elders for liability reasons, yet at the same time control everything they do and say.
• 

  Pams girl

  Hello WS! Im not sure if you remember me, I think I introduced myself on your old thread.....was it you who mentioned Mrs WS suffered with anxiety/panic, or am I going barmy? Hahaha, I may well be......

  Anyway, I suffer with that too, and think thats how I came to say hi to you....?

  How is the Mrs doing?

  Its sounds like you are both doing ok with the slow fade, and great reading the recent posts about your sister....wow, she is making progress it seems, thinking for herself.....is it hard to bite your tongue and give her the answers hahaha?, I know you have to let her find out for herself but I would find it sooooo difficult not to hurry things along!

  Its very exciting to read about your planned house move in the future, do you think you wil be far away enough for a fresh start?

  Wishing you and yours all the best, Paula x
• 

  Crisis of Conscience

  Don't know how I missed this, but it was a great read Winston. Thank you.

  I was able to relate to several things you said. Though having only reached the point of MS, there was plenty of evidence, as well as things elders I trusted said to me, that showed something is seriously wrong in the JW org. That woke me up, amongst other things.

  Thanks again!

  CoC
• 

  WinstonSmith

  Hey Pams Girl, of course I remember you! Thanks for checking in. I was gutted to have to request to have my original diary deleted. We seriously thought we had been outed and even though there was nothing incriminating in there, it seemed the safest thing to do just in case. Thankfully it was a false alarm, so here we are again!

  Mrs Smith does indeed have an anxiety disorder. It is not at a level where she is crippled by it, but every now and then, I'll notice the signs that she is angsty justvanswer all her questions and reason things out. Sometimes we'll head out somewhere and I'll jump in the car. A few minutes later she will finally come to the car and I'll say "So was the gas off and all the windows shut?" and she will sheepishly say yes, and we'll have a good laugh about it. My girl's cool :-)

  Still waiting to hear back from my sister. Her friend is still staying with them but is leaving soon so hopefully we'll hear something soon. You're right, its SO hard not to go all guns and lay it out. She's a smart lady, and I am sure that with some gentle prodding she might just wake up. All we can do is quietly hope and be there for her.

  We are looking forward to moving. It won't be super far from where we are as we have some non-JW martes around here that we want to keep in touch with. I'd love to move to the city, but that might be a bit much for Mrs Smith for the moment. All in good time!

  How are things with you mate? All well I hope. What are your plans for the holidays? Are you going to hang with your pagan friend and having pagan celebrations? We might just be having our own little private pagan celebration at the Smith residence...

  Great to hear from you, take care :-)

  Hey CoC! Glad to hear you enjoyed reading through. I don't know exactly what it is, but there is something deep down that must strike a chord with those who wake up. Two years ago I never would have thought that I would where I am now with regards to being 'awake' about the truth. I sometimes think that most JWs must think there is something wrong, but have too much invested to do anything about so just go with the flow oblivious to the long term harm they are inviting.

  Its great to be awake!
• 

  SkyGreen

  been enjoying your diary for a while, from memory you are a kiwi living in aus? same as me :) I used to live in QLD but not anymore. Might know some of the same people.

  glad for you that you AND "Mrs Smith" are fading together. its lonely fading by myself, even though my hubby is supportive.

  have you heard from your sister yet? hope things work out for her. My husband and I made the mistake of asking the elders for help with our marital issues... worst thing ever. Mind you, it is what got me started "waking up"

  Keep the diary going, especially insights into the things you hear at meetings that are "off" Since im still going as well (to maintain appearances), i should start posting my own thread of wierd current WT teaching....

  Keep smiling
• 

  ziddina

  I don't think we've ever interacted before, but thank you for having the courage to post your story.

  Zid
• 

  WinstonSmith

  Hello SkyGreen and Ziddina!

  Thanks so much for taking the time to read through and make a post. Please keep in contact and feel free to engage anytime! My goal in starting my diary was to share life from 'the inside' and what it is like on the way out. I hope that in some small way it might help others.

  You are right SkyGreen, going to the elders is a two edged sword. People who do so are likely to get smashed, but as a result it might be the jolt they need to wake up.

  Hang in there team, we're all in this together :-)

  By the way, after months of searching a million second hand bookstores, we finally found a copy of In Search of Christian Freedom. SCORE! Even better, it was a Salvation Army shop.....

  Once I finish The Kingdom that Never Came, I'll rip into ISOCF. Some good holiday beach reading there baby!
• 

  WinstonSmith

  Ugh, I know they think they are doing God's work and all, but sheesh, they can't give it a rest for one day can they? A young bro in our congregation, baptised for just over a year just posted on Facebook a copy and paste from an encyclopedia about the pagan roots of Christmas. Followed with a "why would you want anything to do with that?"

  The first comment is from someone who I'm guessing is a non-witness friend replied with a "Yeah but its just a fun day to get together with family" to which bro says "Yes, a day based on paganism."

  Behold, the insensitive reasoning of JWs. Can't leave things alone for one day. Gotta stir the pot!
• 

  WinstonSmith

  So tempted to post a reference to that WT article that says the origin of the practice doesn't matter, what matters is how people view the practice today.

  RESIST WINSTON! RESIST!