What attracted you to the Watchtower?

by Christ Alone 60 Replies latest jw friends

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  LisaRose

  My family converted when I was 13. The main thing that attracted me was the paradise earth teaching. I loved nature and it just sounded right that the earth would be made perfect ànd I could live on earth and not floating around in heaven. I also found the Trinity and hell fire doctrine to be better than what the churches offered. I was not forced by my parents, I willingly joined.

  Of course being so young, I had not have developed critical thinking skills, so I did not question things too much. Then once you ate suckered in, the mind control takes over and you learn not to trust your own feeling and thoughts. I remember being at an assembly and them discussing the heart being the seat of motivation and how you couldn't trust it. They still taught back then that your actual physical heart motivated you. I think they have abandoned that completely ridiculous teaching.

  So cult mind control 101, the carrot and the stick. 30 years of chasing the carrot, but just getting the stick, I finally burned out and left.
• 

  Halo

  steve2 you make some interesting observations and I agree with some of your opinions.

  I made a comment about the veiled judgement from born ins and the resulting effect this has on people like me commenting on a thread like this. If you review the thread you will see that the majority of comments are made by born ins, not those the question was directed at. For born in to have the views of converts is next to impossible hence the reason a born in asks the question. It is difficult to answer because it is complex and this is further hindered by the sweeping assumptions made primarily by born in. I understand you have your opinions about the whys and wherefores, but I have yet to see a thread that asks this question (or similar) that is left for converts to answer free from assumptions by born ins.
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  Ucantnome

  nothing
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  Christ Alone

  I feel so horrible that certain ones of us that were born in are effectively excluding those that converted. Those that were born in had exclusivity forced onto them, and unfortunately it does not leave just because one leaves the WT. It seems that those that were born in tend to be more bitter against the WT than those that converted. Reading through some of these posts, bitterness is still VERY much there. Bitterness really is poisonous.

  I wish I could say something to convince converts to post on this thread, but I see why many don't. I wish I could say that they wouldn't be torn down by those of us that were born in. But it happens alot on JWN. It's a sad thing, I must say.
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  Ucantnome

  Christ Alone,

  I don't understand what you mean.

  I think that those who were raised in the organization had a different experience to those who grew up and joined.

  I don't think I'm bitter toward toward the organization. I just disagree.

  Having said that I have many times listened to those who have not been raised in the organization, some were elders, the stories of their youth, the good jobs they have, how they were free to marry whom ever they choose.

  I know some now who have married the girl they loved have big houses, fine pensions and say how lucky you were to be raised a witness.

  Unfortunately they are mistaken. (in my view)
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  Christ Alone

  I just meant that in my experience the born ins that leave seem to be (in general) much more bitter towards the organization. I am not saying that there is no reason to be. There is. But sometimes it comes off in a way that holds converts back from an open conversation. Since a born in never REALLY had to make the choice for themselves in many ways, they feel that those that DID make the choice, especially as adults, are less intelligent, ignorant, etc... I'm not saying that its true of all born ins. Just most of the born ins in my realm of experience.
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  Ucantnome

  Since a born in never REALLY had to make the choice for themselves in many ways

  I don't know if this is true.
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  Christ Alone

  I mean that in the way that they did not choose this life for themselves. They did not celebrate Christmas and give that up. They did not believe a certain way and change it. They did not fix their lives in terms of morality. They were trained this way from birth. Even the ones who's parents converted did not necessarily choose this for themselves. They may have made the choice AS A CHILD, but this is far different from choosing it as an adult. This of course does not take into account those that were raised in it, left, and came back. But it seems clear from the feelings of converts that they see born ins as being very judgemental towards them. It has seemed to me that born ins are usually the ones that also have an issue with "faders".

  Many converts that became exJWs are turned off by the comment, "I NEVER would have chosen this for myself. It was forced onto me." This implies that you would have been too intelligent than to fall for a cult.

  Of course, I am speaking as a born in. So I may be off base here. But that was the impression I was getting from the posts of other converts that left.
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  LongHairGal

  Christ Alone:

  I can understand to some degree why born-ins are more bitter towards the religion. They didn't have a choice and they didn't have a 'normal' childhood (whatever passes for normal, that is) and they are cheated out of higher education in many cases.

  I joined as a young adult and thankfully I had a fairly normal childhood with holidays and school activities! I also had an education, career and dating experience when I joined the religion and was independent. These facts caused some narrow-minded born-ins there to resent me. I never asked anybody there for anything but yet I got the distinct impression that certain ones there thought I "owed" somebody something. Really? I had no tolerance for anybody there who thought they were going to live on the edge and look for handouts. Go out and get a job like I did, that was my opinion.

  Sad to say, born-ins were responsible for almost all of the gossip and cliques in the congregation and generally were unwelcoming to new people. They also thought they were the "center" or the nucleus of the congregation and "more spiritual" just by virtue of the fact that they grew up there. Well, they can keep their self-righteousness! They were never any friends of mine.

  So, even though I was sick to my stomach at the thought that I wasted 20+ years in this charade, I would feel much, more bitter if I were a born-in. Wasted time is something we can never get back. Like sand in an hourglass it just slipped through our hands!
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  Ucantnome

  Many converts that became exJWs are turned off by the comment, "I NEVER would have chosen this for myself. It was forced onto me." This implies that you would have been too intelligent than to fall for a cult

  Maybe. However from the standpoint of an exJw, those who came in as adults never sat in a classroom and recieved no Christmas cards. They never had to witness to their school mates. They never had to turn down the pretty girl who was crazy about them.

  They swallowed it as adults and promoted to other young people who were suffering something they now reject.