by johnjones3210 41 Replies latest social relationships
yup
learning to interact with the opposite sex socially AND sexually is huge in developing confidence and self esteem. This does not mean you have to be promiscuous to have either of those, but I beleive if you are an ex-JW that is older and trying to "get in the game" it can be a real struggle to not be either a complete wussy or a creepy perv....]
JMHO
Hey man. You are very young to think is too late. Plus, I doubt you are as "messed up" as you think you are. PM me if you want to talk about anything private, but honestly bro, I am not THAT far from your age, and happily married with a fantastic sex life.
Don't give up on yourself yet. The shame thing, it goes away.
What brings you to the board....and welcome!
How about growing up with a pedophile father.........? You aren't doomed but you do have to take responsibility to reach out for help. Good help here.
LOL. Have fun "catching up" and while your at it...be sure to pick up an STD or unwanted pregnancy!
Seriously though, just wait until your married. Its much safer and worthwhile. And, if your gay....I don't have any comment.
I wasn't a born in but it still messed me up sexually.
TurttleTurttle....What a shitty thing to say to somone.
I think that people are more understanding when you tell them where you came from. Just be honest when you are dating that youmight make some missteps because you werent allowed to date when you were younger. When I explained my background to a girl I was dating she was understanding and happy that I told her.
I can relate entirely. How long have you been out? I feel like things are starting to normalize for me (just starting my second year out), but my first year out I felt immense curiosity over EVERYTHING that the JWs had demonized. Nothing has gotten me into huge trouble yet, as time went on I realized a lot of it is really no big deal.
But I do feel like I missed out on a lot of fun!! Now I'm grown up, and, while the JW pressures/guilt is gone, there are still societal expectations. And regardless of curiosities and the occasional anger over what I've missed out, satisfying them at the cost of my current relationship is not worth it.
Yes yes and yes. I am typical married at 19 cause we loved I mean were horny young people and later divorced. The whole time I was married had an unhealthy longing for someone else anything else. Got divorced dated a few girls to get that feeling out and found my love who was a catholic and can't be happier. BTW she is a firecraker in bed. I think what if I stayed a jw and had to be miserable with someone for the rest of my life. Talk about the unhappiest people on earth. No wonder Elders seem so angry all the time LOL
I felt like you a while back. I joined a dating site and went through 18 partners in one year and ended up getting one of those girls pregnant. Now I'm happy sticking to just one partner.
I'll buck the trend here. I don't feel messed up at all. Married over 15 years to the only person I've had sex with. Our marriage is fine and the sexual aspect I think is pretty decent (although I'm a typical guy and would like to see it happen more often).
At first, the lack of experience was telling but we both lacked it so it wasn't embarrasing. There's been great improvement.
I probably got lucky (no pun intended) in that my wife and I are compatible. Obviously we didn't know that before the wedding and it was a roll of the dice.
I also got some decent advice that if you "take care" of her, its way better for you. Also, it seems to me that on the rare occasions when the subject of sex comes up (and its often the women talking amongst themselves), the folks in my generation and younger who very young kids/not born in the 70s don't even know about the WTS prohibitions regarding certain acts. Either that or they just don't care.
I know many were messed up. I was certainly very awkard with the ladies when I was a teenager but I would have been that way regardless of being a JW.
