First time back to the king dumb hall in a year!

BreathoftheIndianNose

Hey everyone,

So it's been over a year and this Saturday I'm going to the hall. Can you help to prep me for what sort of emotions and feelings might come rushing in? The reason I'm going is because its my sister's wedding. That's right, my only sister is getting married this Saturday. I'm trying to get excited about it but its not easy. See she never invited me, in fact I never heard about it from my sister or parents or any family member for that matter. I heard about it through the grape vine. I sent my sister an email to ask if I could come and she replied that I could, in no more than a few words. Seeing all my family and friends for the first time in over a year will make for some teary eyes on my part, but I just want to know if you have any advice. How would you recommend preparing mentally for such an experience? What should I do or not do? I'm just making sure that I handle this situation in the best way possible.

Thank you,

Nose

Lozhasleft

Most importantly, protect yourself, emotionally that is. You might meet some negative responses which could hurt and unsettle you because of course it's a cult and hence their attitudes aren't always kindly. It must already have affected you that you didn't get an invitation?

Loz x

happytobefree

BreathoftheIndianNose I have no advice for you...But I will send my thoughts and prayers for strength for you.

Reading your story is just heartbreaking. You only sister did not invite you...I can't even imagine. Really what in hades is wrong with these people...how do they sleep? I really don't know understand mistreating your BLOOD family for some IDIOTS!!!!

OMG...I REALLY REALLY DO NOT LIKE THIS RELIGION!!!

flipper

BREATHOFTHEINDIANNOSE- Don't feel too bad. My youngest JW daughter didn't even invite me and Mrs. Flipper to her wedding, we had to crash it just to attend sitting over on the side of the kingdom hall against a wall. The sort of emotions you'll experience ? Nervousness, a bit of paranoia like that the elders will be watching you as some of the other Witnesses will be watching too to see your reactions to their rude behavior. The way to rise above their rudeness ? Just be dignified , show respect for your sister's special day and be cordial, polite and don't get into any snits with any of the JW's there. Be the better person by rising above their actions and show 'em that you have become an even better person by your civil actions since leaving the Witnesses. It will go over well and you'll be glad you did.

If JW's try to engage you in any arguments of doctrine or ask the " when are you coming back to the " truth " question - just say " thanks for your concern I'm doing fine " and change the subject back to how happy you are for your sisters special day. It's your SISTER'S special wedding day, not he JW's " I'm going to use this wedding to preach and market for the WT Society day " . Some JW's will try to probe you with questions. Just keep your cool and be evasive. Yet hug them and be kind. It's about all I got for you, but you'll do fine. Hang in there

jam

Are you DF?? Was there an announcement made in

the hall about you. If not, enjoy your sister wedding.

BroMac

I just dont know how I would handle that. hats off to you for wanting to go.

you must be DF or DA? not that it should matter, but for them to treat you that way, well it would explain it

blondie

I understood that the KH is open to the public even df'd people are allowed in if they behave themselves. If you are inactive, you are still considered part of the flock per the WTS.

*** w93 7/15 p. 27 Tenderly Shepherding Jehovah’s Precious Sheep ***

Inactivity in the ministry or in attending Christian meetings does not mean that the sheep is no longer part of the flock. He remains part of “all the flock” for whom the elders must “render an account” to Jehovah.

*** w97 4/15 p. 26 Weddings That Honor Jehovah ***

While a disfellowshipped person could be allowed to attend the talk at the Kingdom Hall, The Watchtower of April 15, 1984, said: “It would be unfitting to have in the wedding party people who are disfellowshipped or whose scandalous life-style grossly conflicts with Bible principles.”

jgnat

Have a pile of stuff packed away to keep your hands busy. This could include a notebook and pen, kleenex, breath mints, iPhone or iPod with earbuds.

Stay standing until everyone is asked to sit down. This leaves you in a power position and allows you to exit if someone gets too pushy. I tend to get surrounded by little old lady publishers who persistently invade my space by touching and petting. So I stay standing so I can back out if my space is invaded. Another approach is to step closer in to the space to make them back off.

Know where the washroom is located.

Dress to blend in or dress to stand out. Either one might help ward people off. I see adult children of Witnesses attend memorial night in their goth and green hair. They make their statement and generally people give them a wide birth.

Pretend you are an Anthropologist to study the social interactions of a foreign community.

Children are always fun to watch. I wink at them.

james_woods

I am just hoping that this does not somehow go terribly wrong.

jgnat

james_woods, the key is to make no waves, no confrontations, no drama. Kind of like funerals. Everyone's emotions are on high alert and it's an anniversary so people will remember forever.

The worst I can imagine is the ushers turn away BreathoftheIndianNose at the door.

Hopefully the bride is too busy with her day to make waves.

If she wants to make a shunning statement or if Breath needs to unburden, they can do it on another day.

First time back to the king dumb hall in a year!

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