Bipolar Landlady kicks me out!

by Terry 140 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Terry

  Well, knock me over with a feather!!

  I suddenly found a letter in my e-mail account from---guess who? DEB.

  As you will recall, her parting shot at me was that she never wanted to see me or have anything to do with me again.

  Here is her e-mail. You'll immediately notice it is almost "another person"! Heartbreakingly real and sincere.

  Terry, I want to apologize for cursing at you in my last emails. You know it is the first response of an uneducated person that is angry. I was wrong. I am only asking you to please tell me what in your opinion is wrong with me. I go to bed crying and wake up crying every day and night. You did say that I saw it as the other guys fault in one of your emails. You are the only one that can tell me what I am doing wrong. I beg you to do this for me. I know that something is definitely wrong and I cannot tell my doctor unless I have outside help. That is what I am asking you for. I wish you well and promise not to reply if you have any information you are willing to give me to help myself. I won't be a stalker about you I promise just please tell me what my defects are. Thank you, Deb.
• 

  Terry

  And here is my reply:

  Deb,

  I don't have hard feelings and I don't blame you. I'm not qualified to analyze people or diagnose them. I'd simply say that you tend to oscillate between very HIGH EXPECTATIONS to a bitterly LOW DISAPPOINTMENT. The old saying "Perception IS reality" would apply here. At the moment you are perceiving one way and THAT moment IS reality. Perhaps the next day it is a different perception and then THAT is the reality. Either way--you aren't making anything up so much as you are reacting to the way you honestly see or perceive things. I had feelings of inferiority my whole life due to family interaction growing up. Constant feelings that I might trigger a wild response made me very PRIVATE.. I can't speak for others. I've been told that sometime such a reaction as you've experienced is something called Borderline Personality. But, I'm no psychologist and I'm not trying to identify you or diagnose your behavior. I'm simply not educated in that field and might do more harm than good. I do wish you all the best in your life and truly hope you can forgive me for not measuring up to your high expectations. All any of us can do is the best we can. Sometimes that is way below what is necessary. Cheers, Terry
• 

  wasblind

  LOL

  How do we know you didn't send that E-mail to yourself

  If I'm wrong , I apologize to you from the start for the world to see

  Which lead me to have to ask: Why would a man who prefer the Opera in a Tux

  and the company of the highly intellectual, have to be kicked out

  by people he describe as Uneducated "Red State" bikers ???

  As for sunday cookin' lessons , you said you would risk

  goin' over there for your daughter. But you claim these folks don't wash their HANDS !!!!!

  You mean to tell us that you are willin' to risk you and your daughters health

  for cookin' lessons ???

  You said it was a "skeery" situation, and in your OP that debbie said if she had a gun she would use it

  on page six come to find out debbie does have guns in the house cuz her husband collects them

  And scince he does EVERYTHING debbie says, I'm sure if debbie said leave her a gun , he would

  accordin' to the things you say

  Terry , I'm not trynna make light of your situation

  that's a bad place for anyone to be. But My GOD !!!!

  Accordin' to the last E-Mail, Did debbie complete the third grade ??????

  On the first page of this thread you state you had a first clue

  why didn't you take that clue and use it to look for another place BEFORE shit hit the fan ???

  Do you realize how you sized these folks up all the way from Texas to Japan ?????

  And these where the folks who took you in, when you had nowhere else to go

  Cuz if you did, why choose folks totally opposite of you ???? Relatives or not !!!!!

  can't you give them credit for that, if nothin else

  Thay's your blood kin !!!!

  .
• 

  Vanderhoven7

  Hope she doesn't react to the possible "borderline personality" label....despite the fact that it fits rather convincingly.
• 

  wasblind

  Terry Describe that as a scary situation . I would too

  especially wit guns that could be added to the mix

  It's a good thing somebody used good sense to end this livin' situation

  She may have hurt him in one of her mood swings

  I give her credit for that alone

  I would have been pissed too if someone sent me an E-mail from

  the next room. But considerin' her condition. Maybe that was the best

  thing

  A thread that's titled " Bipolar Landlady Kicks me out " Sounds like the diagnosis had already been made

  .
• 

  wasblind

  I don't claim to be Tech savvy, as a matter of fact

  My daughter have to assist me on quite a few things

  when it come to computers

  The reason I question The last E-mail Terry recieved is tha fact

  that his reply does not have a box around it. Couldn't he post

  the Original reply along wit the response like on page four of this thread ????

  Like I said before, If I'm wrong, I apologize to you Terry

  right here and now

  But the questions I have asked in post 8029 remains the same

  .
• 

  Jim_TX

  Terry,

  I know it's funny to read what some other person has written in an e-mail to you, but I am beginning to think that since she supposedly blew you off - why not just block any future e-mailings from her?

  Don't allow her to have any contact with you - unless, you are still enjoying the exchange of words with her.

  I'd block her a** in a heartbeat. Over. Fini. Done. End of story.

  All your current response is going to do is evoke another tirade from her - full of accusations and 'if I had a gun' type of responses.

  She may claim to not be 'stalking' you, but she is hounding you. She is playing you like a fiddle, and ... you may be liking it.

  You've already moved out. Time to 'cut the cord', dude.

  Regards,

  Jim TX
• 

  Terry

  Vanderhoven7: you have PM

  Wasblind: you have a PM

  Jim--you have a PM
• 

  Dogpatch

  Terry says,

  I just don't know whether to feel sorry for Deb or to really be deeply pissed at her for her descpicably rude paranoia turned on me!

  That's the way bipolars are. I have lived with two, worked with one, and had close friends who were really messed up with it.

  Since they usually feel bad about it when their anger subsides, don't rub it in, but show them (without attacking them) how much it ruined your life without anger. They will be nicer to you, hopefully, in the future. They often are normally sensitive, kind people.

  Don't ever try revenge unless they did something illegal or horrible. They will erupt like a volcano and make you as miserable as possible. Just take steps to NOT BE AROUND THEM in that state, and "forget" the episodes afterwards, as they will feel bad and will be sensitive to any attempted revenge on your part. They often punish themselves.

  I took the weird treatment I received at the hands of a decade-long roommate who is bi-polar and very well-educated. I would invite him and his GF over for dinner, make them a drink, watch a good movie, and as soon as he hit the second drink he launched into a hateful tirade out of the blue! It scared me... never before saw that in a person. I went through it in hell for years, told him never to enter my room when he was drinking or had a bad day, but otherwise he was great conversational company. Too bad.

  It only was easier to bear when I learned to ignore and make light of it in my mind. Then finally he moved out. I AM VERY HAPPY!!!

  Randy
• 

  caliber

  I appreciate your kind, reasonable and balanced approach to this situation cheers !