Bipolar Landlady kicks me out!

by Terry 140 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  talesin

  Terry,

  Just so you know, the St. Vincent de Paul Society has a HUGE center in DFW. They will help you out.

  I know what it's like to be hungry, and have no one to help. It's so hard, and cold-and-hungy is the absolute worst! I'm glad you have a place to sleep now, and hope things get better real soon.

  xoxo

  tal

  and this,

  edit: I am also returning to the KH with my family - I can't get out of here soon enough. thanks for helping me make my resolution. prasie Jah

  Hooray! Don't let the door hit you on the way out, s+g.
• 

  wasblind

  PM recieved

  In the later years of my grandmothers life , while she still lived on the farm

  she came down wit an illness that affected her mental state

  There were days she would be sweet as could be, and other days her tongue could cut like a knife

  like Debbie, she had guns in the house, which my uncles had to take

  because she started shootin' at butterflies ( So sad to see a loved one deteriorate in front of your eyes )

  like you, we assumed the things she said and did to us was related to this illness

  so it served no purpose for us to talk trash about our grandma

  BECAUSE we suspected it was related to an illness

  This board is a really good place to discuss the things you have gone through

  because many can relate. And they can share suggestions that may help

  and even assist you personally when moved to do so

  Debbie may have inconvienienced you, but how long, depends on you

  She has not destroyed your life, she did you a favor. When she kicked you out of HER castle

  she has now givin' you the opportunity to find a castle of your own

  where you can finally reign as a King

  Trust, I understood very well that you only used the opera as a comparison to the things you would prefer

  I also understood how you sized them up to be Uneducated, " Red " state, Bikers

  Which lead me to conclude that you have " Champagne taste and Pinto bean pockets "

  As for Soft and Gentle, She was attacked for stickin' up for an ill woman, by posters who thought of debbie

  as a monster. And regaurdless of debbies illness, whenever she would utter

  the words DIVORCE, one poster thought that would be a solution for bobby

  who himself, has yet to seek a divorce

  Many have shown more concern for you than you have for yourself

  I say this becuase as you relate through this thread, Crazy + Guns in the house

  yet you would still be there if she didn't kick you out

  cuz you didn't have the sense to take the first clue and use it to get out

  without bein' told too

  Only a few extended that concern for debbie in regards

  to the title of this thread that specifically pointed to the reason suspected for her actions

  And to those posters, I applaude, You have my respect

  In your last E-mail that you said was from debbie, she claimed to be uneducated

  You replied usin' the word " Oscillate " in your reply

  Trust, talkin' over the head of your uneducated bipolar cousin dont' help things none

  .

  .
• 

  Terry

  Randy sez: I took the weird treatment I received at the hands of a decade-long roommate who is bi-polar and very well-educated. I would invite him and his GF over for dinner, make them a drink, watch a good movie, and as soon as he hit the second drink he launched into a hateful tirade out of the blue! It scared me... never before saw that in a person. I went through it in hell for years, told him never to enter my room when he was drinking or had a bad day, but otherwise he was great conversational company. Too bad.

  Well, thanks Randy; I don't feel so bad for letting it continue. It is that tricky "otherwise" which causes us to hang in there when maybe we should cut and run.

  Talesin sez: I know what it's like to be hungry, and have no one to help. It's so hard, and cold-and-hungy is the absolute worst! I'm glad you have a place to sleep now, and hope things get better real soon.

  xoxo

  tal

  I went downtown to the public library today and got there too early. Outside the homeless people are perched waiting...A large number of vagrants, street people, alcoholics, etc. flow into the library and remain all day. You can see them prop a book in front of them and pretend to be reading while they sleep.

  Nearby is one of the Mission outfits where you hear a sermon and get fed. It is difficult to look at the lives of people in this condition and compare it in any way to my brief bounce to the ground and back. I don't know what the solution is--or, even if there is one. An amazing number of people devote themselves to homeless charity in our city. Whenever I hear Jehovah's Witnesses dismiss mankind as "birdfood" at Armageddon I immediately think of the kind souls who are actually doing something real to help others---and there is no comparison!

  Wasblind....Thank you for sharing your opinion.
• 

  Terry

  Caliber:I appreciate your kind, reasonable and balanced approach to this situation cheers !

  Here is the thing some people don't quite grasp. The most difficult person to deal with is one who uses covert hostility as an agenda.

  The insinuation, the back-handed suggestion of bad intentions, the pretense at concern while sticking the knife in.....these are things

  that don't confront directly so as to be grappled with and worked out. You let it slide. You pretend not to notice. You zip your lip. All the while--like the Trolls on the internet--the object of their "game" (for want of a better word) is to provoke you, bait you and then condemn you if/when you slip.

  Cowards and bully's may or may not have mental problems. Who really knows? Some people just get off on exerting malevolent power. Power? Yes,

  to manipulate a reaction.

  What else is there but to be kind, reasonable and balanced? The alternative is very ugly, indeed!

  I was living comfortably in my own apartment in Fort Worth when Deb asked me out to lunch one day and tried to persuade me to move in. She gave many positive arguments. The one that most appealed to me was being surrounded by family. Otherwise, the move from Ft.Worth to Arlington was no advantage to me whatsoever! I put way too many miles on my car and spent gas money by the handfull! The idea of living with a family member who offered solidarity was a winning argument. Did it work out that way? No. But, then--how many people get along with family anyway?
• 

  wasblind

  The insinuation, the back-handed suggestion of bad intentions, the pretense at concern while sticking the knife in.....these are things

  that don't confront directly so as to be grappled with and worked out. You let it slide. You pretend not to notice. You zip your lip. All the while--like the Trolls on the internet--the object of their "game" (for want of a better word) is to provoke you, bait you and then condemn you if/when you slip.

  Cowards and bully's may or may not have mental problems. Who really knows? Some people just get off on exerting malevolent power. Power? Yes,

  to manipulate a reaction.

  What else is there but to be kind, reasonable and balanced? The alternative is very ugly, indeed!_____Terry

  Thank you for your opinion Terry

  There's alway two ways to look at things, and the both of us are entitled

  to voice ours on an open discusion board

  I'm not trynna be mean , by leavin' out the sugar coat. But to much sugar can effect what need to be seen

  and bein' too bitter may cause the person to reject what he needs to see

  I understand your desire to wanna be around your family

  Here's the thing. Debbie seems not be be as educated as you

  From what you posted above, she didn't seem to realized that you were

  set up nicely where your were. And that the only advantage what so ever for the move

  was to be around family , not a money issue

  Unlike you, She didn't pose the question " How many people get along with family anyway ? "

  What may have turned her off when you brought up the Opera

  is the fact you didn't explained to her that you never ever attended one. It was only a demonstration

  Debbie seem like plain folk, and you came off as uppity

  Regaurdless of your religious beliefs. If not GOD, you should at least give thanks to Debbie

  for allowin' you to move outta her house on your own steam

  You coulda left on a stretcher and she in hand cuffs

  .
• 

  Terry

  Wasblind: Debbie seem like plain folk, and you came off as uppity

  Well, I'm a high school graduate. Deb is also. I had profound feelings of inferiority growing up without a dad at a time when you were shamed if there was divorce.

  I tried to compensate by any means of self-improvment I could find. Deb's mom gave her to the babysitter! When mom remarried and the new husband discovered there was a child given away--he made her go get Deb. He adopted her and treated her like his own little angel. I think there was some sort of twisted competition between mom and daughter that ended badly for her. I escaped my family by joining a cult! Deb married an abusive husband. I went to prison. Deb got the hell beat out her and divorced him.

  Long story short? I don't think there is a "straight-line answer" to my personality and Deb's personality or the quirks of our relationship. My need to be close to some sort of "ideal" family and Deb's need may come from the same source--however--the (let's call it) pathology isn't compatible to the extent it can be achieved without conflict.

  I'm simply ill-equipped to understand. I make many many wrong choices in trying to communicate and it seems like I pay for every one of them.

  So too with Deb. A polite distance has always worked best for us. We shall retreat to a neutral corner.
• 

  wasblind

  We have quite a few thing in common Terry

  I too came from an abusive home as a child, and like you I

  was sucked into a cult as an adult

  The great thing is we both got out of those situations. The other great thing is

  You can once again find your own space, and appreciate it more than ever before
• 

  wasblind

  I"m thinking I've had enough of walking on eggshells. I am going to view this as Opportunity and not tragedy.

  I haven't been happy in Arlington. I've put a lot of miles on my 98 Honda driving to see my kids in Fort Worth every day._____Terry

  The next time your cousin try to convince you to move back to Arlington to be close to family

  let her know that you are already as close to family as need be , and wit your own place

  And I really do wish you the best, without the added sugar of course
• 

  soft+gentle

  wasblind, thanks for understanding what I was trying to say.

  Terry, i apologise for going too far. i am glad you are bouncing back. - flowers for your new home
• 

  Terry

  soft and gentle:Terry, i apologise for going too far. i am glad you are bouncing back. - flowers for your new home

  Thank you! Everybody is entitled to have their say and think their own way.

  It is the best of friends who will tell it "like it is". None of us wants to hear we are wrong in our assessment, but, how will we

  grow and change if we can't face our failings in the first place. Your words are appreciated.

  Wasblind: And I really do wish you the best, without the added sugar of course

  I've known about your sweetness all this time; you can't keep it a secret. Thank you!