My wife just told me to move out... (page 5)

Londo111

I'm really sorry you are undergoing this.

Maybe you can share with her the July 2009 Awake, page 22, which says, " No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family. Does study of the Bible read to family breakups? No. In fact, the Bible encourages a husband and wife who practice difference religions to remain together as a family."

Ask her if she believes this. Tell her you made a vow to God and do not intend to break it.

The Searcher

Just two things I'd say to her if she was my wife;

Darling, I don't want you to jeopardise your relationship with Jehovah, so please, for all our sakes, read Ephesians 5:33. It says that a wife should have "deep respect" for her husband, or in Greek, "reverential fear". A wife should have a reverential fear of God's headship arrangement, not her husband. Was Esther not faithful to her husband the king? He wasn't one of God's Jewish nation.

I'm sorry if I've upset you with my doubts and questions - I just want to be certain that I really do have the truth. Please be patient with me! (while she's being 'patient', make token attendances now & then, because more and more GB inspired utterances are going to start affecting more and more Witnesses. Then she may want you to discuss what you know)

problemaddict

Good advise here already. Do NOT move out. Cool it on the rhetoric. It is an automated response that takes her brain out of the equation and allows her to do something she would normally never dream of......end her marriage.

Play ball a little. Don't push too hard. Follow the advise here, and give her a cool down period before you do anything. Reassure her of your love for her.

sspo

I went thru the same thing six years ago...there is not much you can do to make her happy now that she knows you're an "apostate" and " she's spiritually endangerment by your presence in the house.

Remind her that even if you are an unbeliever the apostle Paul encourages the believer not to leave his-her mate.

Do not move out, don't make it easy for her, don't try to be nice and give in with the hope she will change her mind.

Tell her to move out if she cannot handle it.

After 26 years, my marriage fell apart due to the same problem you are experiencing.

Good luck and hope your wife comes to her senses.

BluesBrother

The good advice has been said already.......stay put, be firm but be caring to her. Try and make an accommodation eg. both drop the subject and let her do her thing unapposed.If she is like mine, she would be the one to keep raising the topic!

In time, when she sees that you have not grown horns or changed into a debauched person , no doubt she will mellow. Perhaps a lot of this fear and shock.

NB Isn't it strange that the only J W in this conversation wants to break the God-given marriage tie, and us "wicked apostates" are the ones who are advising to try and save it??

bigmac

ignore my advice !

empty any joint a/cs

pack all her stuff and leave it in the doorway

change all locks.

but--get in quick--pre-emptive strike.

i learned all this the hard way.

Roberta804

Make sure from now on that you do not have any children until you and your wife settle this or seperate. Children deserve BOTH a father a mother.

nuthouse escapee

Stay put. Do NOT leave the marital home or give up your bed. She knows how you feel about "the Truth" so there is no need to harp on it. Let things settle, assure her of your love, and take it from there. I know you desperately want her to see TTATT but shoving it down her throat will not work and will give her the "spiritual endangerment" card to play. Be calm and let things unfold the way they're going to. Positive vibes to you, Leslie

Stealth

'i learned all this the hard way.'

Same here, Even though at the time I was ready to be done with both the JWs and her.. I moved out when my loyal JW wife asked me to for the exact same reason yours has asked you to.

The hand she was playing was to a) get me back in line with JW or b) My leaving the home would lead to my giving her grounds for divorce.

After I left, I spent the next year deprogramming myself and reading everything I could about the religion, I was busy but not like she thought. I had no desire to date or get involved with another person, I remained single while she became lonely, got involved with another man and she got DF.

To this day, I have not been DF nor have I DA myself. She is still DF and now an Xjw herself.

One of my biggest regrets was leaving the home when she asked me.

Don't make the same mistake!

MsD

As a JW man/husband aren't you supposed to be the head of the household?

It seems to me that she wants to dictate to you what she wants when at the end of the day she is supposed to submit to you.

Unless of course if you were abusive. It's a shame that she would rather be married to a man that is Goes to show how much the organization has brainwashed her. At least you've been able to help other family members recognize TTATT. If anything she should move out if it is her choice to leave you. You have absolutely no obligation to leave since you want to work on your marriage.

So sorry your going through this... Hope everything works out for you

My wife just told me to move out...

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