CO want to talk to me (page 3)

ruderedhead

I hope everything works out for you, goodsoul. Please send your letter stepping down quickly, before the co gets there. Is it possible for you and your wife to be away from home for most of the days and early evenings during the week of the co's visit? Browsing at stores, movie night, just anything so as not to be caught off gaurd by an unexpected visit? You sound like you are simply not ready to speak to anyone, and it might stress you out too much. All the best to you and your wife in your fade.

goodsoul

Thanks again to all!
Your advices makes my mind more clear, since after yesterday's elders visit I am still too emotional.
Thanks a lot, RayPublisher for your PM!
Thanks, problemaddict, I will follow your advice and will specify, that I brought my thoughts to "older men" as instructed. Finally, it is truth, I did it only to not bothered others, since it doesn't have sence. But it didn't have sence to met with elders either..but they were my "friends"..
My native language is slavic.
Good thought,ruderedhead, I am going to send letter this week. And I will try to escape(mama mia, from whom?!!!)during these days.
It is so ugly..If I knew these things before I stepped into this sect..But there where good things too. I found there my dear wife, who is with me in all my(our) JW matters. Hope to help her family too.

problemaddict

We are all with you bud. Try to think it through like you are doing and cap the emotion to the extent you can. You do not "owe" these guys anything.

Maye we ask out of morbid curiosity, what was it you developed an issue with to bring you to where you are now?

Newly Enlightened

Welcome! It's difficult no matter which way you choose because there is no 'Good' way to leave. We have been trying to fade for 5 months now and our family are all asking what is going on? Are you leaving the org? But the minute you say anything, they will shun you & turn you in to the Elders

peace be with you on your journey and we wish you the best.

Bob_NC

I read good advice from all so far. I want to echo the advice already given by problemaddict not to go into the specifics. do not let them drag you into a conversation about how you feel about about the organiztion and the FDS. That always comes up.

Say you are not there to comment about anyone's relationship with Jehovah or claims, that you can speak only about yourself. Say that you do not have a message that you think needs to be heard, that you have personal issues that you already talked to the elders about that prevent you from speaking before the congregation. And that you are content to let the matters rest. You have to be somewhat content to let the matters rest simply because you cannot change the organization by attacking it locally. You could add, as you already mentioned, that you really don't want to talk about it any more.

I was similar to you, an elder a long time with many privileges in the Circuit. When I stepped down the CO also talked to me. He did not dig too much. He was most concerned and looking to see what threat I was going to be to the congregation. Once I relieved him of that concern he was done and ready to go. Bob in NC

OnTheWayOut

Hello. You seem to have a good handle on this already.

The only clear advice I might add is that you don't need to go backward, trying to fade more carefully. You are already where you are. If your main goal is to not be DF'ed, then cease contact with the C.O. beyond an email or text you might send him. Don't even have a back and forth phone conversation. Someone else will listen and you might say something they can say you disassociated yourself on. Just send your email. I would highly recommend you make things easier for them and clearly spell out in that email, "I resign as an elder." That will suffice.

Then stick with "I am fine, I know how to find you guys if I need you" on all matters.

whathappened

Isn't it amazing that in an eight hour span how much love and support you find here on this so called "apostate" website? The Watchtower lies about its apposers. They lie about everything. Just refuse to meet with them. Tell them you will get back with them when and if you are want to talk. Be firm, don't give them the upper hand. They are not gods servants and you owe them nothing.

Best wishes to you and welcome. Keep us updated.

Aussie Oz

it has become more and more evident to me that it really is a cult you know.

one does not have to plan and make strategy to leave a bonafide religion.

i wish you well, you have already tipped their hand, they know. raising 1914, 1919, generation etc is an automatic red flag, i would think you should have known that as an elder though. You dont have to be causght talking to anyone. THOUGHT CRIME is enough.

the CO will tell them what to do.

Oz

goodsoul

Thanks to all of you, guys! Now I almost confident, that things will go the way we need.
Newly Enlightened, thanks, I see you on a same boat. How I understand you...
Thanks, Bob_NC, OnTheWayOut for your clear thoughts, it makes easier for me to formulate stuff.

Thanks, Aussie Oz! I shared info with guys, who I thought, were my friends(at least one of them. I supported him so much and he was really appreciate. So I didn't think things will go that way).
I intend to write pretty clear letter about my feelings, confusion, hard times and ect. without any mentioning about teaching or WT at all. I don't have to be sincere with them. I don't have anything against them, but they are blind and I am not a doctor.

2+2=5

I intend to write pretty clear letter about my feelings, confusion, hard times and ect. without any mentioning about teaching or WT at all. I don't have to be sincere with them. I don't have anything against them, but they are blind and I am not a doctor

Well said. All the best with your step down and exit. Like Aussie said, it has to be a cult when you need a strategy to leave.

CO want to talk to me

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