by love_ever_wanting 53 Replies latest social relationships
I haven't got any theocratic privilleges yet.
Talk about an oxymoron- theocratic priveleges.
Find out what congregation he goes to. Call the kingdom hall, and ask about him.
If this was the regular world and you were calling up his church to in inquire about someone, they would tell you to take a hike-- no personal information would be given out to a stranger over the telephone.
try JW match, that is where my EX-CO found his hot wife
I have looked into JW Match, you have to pay in order to contact people though. And yes I agree, about calling the congregation, the elders would not be doing their protective duty if they answered an inquiry on someone who appears to be "love struck" by one of their congregation members over the phone.
It is advised though by people I know, if I like someone, go to their congregation and ask about him that way.
Okay so here is another question up for debate.
How do you tell if someone in the congregation has a crush on you? I mean just because I am a Bible Student and technically "Off Limits" doesn't mean someone is not crushing and waiting until I am baptised.
Is there any signals that would differ from how to tell if anyone else likes you? I just think the signs would be different.
I'll bite: if they stare at you.
Hi there.
In your post you spoke of the sister who said talked about how her husband was all spiritual goal oriented, a pioneer, etc. Is that really what any woman is looking for? C'mon.
My brother is that type of jw man, in fact his wife often remarked about how spiritual her husband was. By the way, she was his second wife. They're divorced now. A spiritual man (in jw-speak) is not necessarily a good man, or more importantly, good husband material.
Bottom line, decide what You want, not what some organization tells you is what you should be looking for in a mate. You know yourself better than they do.
Adiva
You seem too confused and insecure to be able to commit to anybody. How old are you?
I have never been a JW nor will I ever become one as there are so many things with this cult that are just so wrong.
I met my inactive JW husband on eharmony. He presented himself as a Christian which I think was misleading as JW's don't worship Christ so thus cannot be called Christians. I never knew much about the JW's when he told me that he was a JW, I never gave it much thought as he wasn't attending meetings so I saw no signs of any problems.....wrong! 8 years into our relationship and 4 years into our marriage, one of those Bible pushers shows up at our door, he says that he is a baptised JW, he starts attending again, I start researching, learn that he is involved in a cult not a religion and my world falls apart. My wonderful, kind husband turns into someone that I don't recognize whenever he discusses his beliefs.
FYI, he started attending in November. Ironic as it may seem, I was diagnosed with a rare blood disorder in January which is preventing me from having a needed surgery until my team of doctors can determine how to operate without me either clotting or bleeding out. Needless to say, I have instructed all doctors to not confer with my husband in case of an emergency! I do not believe that he would deny me life saving transfusions but I want to be safe.
My husband is a wonderful man who loves me very much and he too is being torn apart by all of this. My doctors have told me that stress aggrevates my condition so the timing for his return was bad. There has been incredible stress and tension in our house and I had a huge meltdown yesterday and I was ready to move out. My wonderful husband stepped away from his cult personality, took me in his arms, told me that he couldn't stand to see me like this and said that he would not attend the Hall for a while. I was totally shocked and appreciative and I know that he means what he says. I know that this is a temporary fix but perhaps we can work something out in the future.In the meantime, I can focus on my health and have him by my side.
What I am trying to say, is if you are convinced that being a JW is what you want to do with your life, although it is beyond my rational thinking why you would do this, pick a JW man only and find him wherever. Don't go ruining a non JW man 's life with all the baggage that this religion brings. Why ruin two families?
I'll tell you a story from my church. As a bible-believing church, we took the "be not equally yoked" scripture very seriously, and interpreted it to mean someone in our church. This immediately limited the pool of available partners. There were about 300 members, so it was a sizeable congregation, but even so. I watched over the years as there were two waves of "pairing off". As the alpha couples picked each other, the rest quickly snapped up the leftovers. There were a few singles, at the bottom of the pile, who had to pick from the leavings. I wisely (or luckily) remained single.
Many of these fast marriages failed.
I've concluded that there's more to being compatible than religious compatibility. There has to be a match of temperament, and a zing of difference. Mix with maturity all around, and you have a winner.
Here I am, in a mixed religious marrige, but compatible in so many other ways.
Jgnat - Sounds identical to the KH on how your church members pick mates
It was even worse for our kids. They'd been raised together, gone to school together, played together, gone to church together. Now that we are all grown up with grandchildren I'd mentioned to another parent that our kids dating each other was like dating their brother! Yuck. Our children proved to be smarter than we were and cast their net wide to find unique mates.
Avida:
I personally don't care about their "spiritual status", especailly since I have not been raised in this religion, but for those who this is all they have ever know, apparently its a turn on because you can see how much they love Jehovah.
But it also goes to show, how some people can really manipulate an organization, I am not just talking about JW, but it just demonstrates how deceiving one can be.
