My son contemplates suicide. (page 2)

ashitaka

dman

same thing happened to me. definitly keep him busy, and get him involved in other things...tell him to make friends in school, let him do what he needs to be happy.

it's a shame, but obvious that they are finally shutting him out.

professional help may be the right thing to do, but talk to him about it first...just don't assume. He may be proud, and his pride may be one of the few things he has left. If he thinks that you and him can work through it together, try that first.

This is just the first thing that is happening to him to show that he is in a world of bastards, with a few good people in it that he can trust, including you.

Like I said, I got through similar, and worse situations, with suicide being the only consolation in my mind for a couple of years. I got through it on my own, but he may not be able to...

good luck to you

ashi

lauralisa

Hi dmouse,

Most people who contemplate suicide do NOT really want to die; they are hurting so very badly that they want the pain to stop.

If rank and file witnesses are even remotely aware that their stupid "he's bad association now, don't be seen with him in public" edicts result in so much heartbreak, they are guilty of emotional blackmail, intentional abuse, and loathesome evil. If a young person succeeds in an attempt to "stop the pain", then they are guilty of murder.

If this was my son (I've been in your position - my son had other issues, not jw-related) I would do some real coaching with him as to what REAL friendships are about: loyalty, extending benefits of doubts, affection and concerns for NO reason other than they are their individual self!!!

"Friendship" within the borg is entirely conditional upon arbitrary and unpredictable capricious "customs" that have everything to do with FEAR AND CONTROL. A True Friend will support him wherever and however his own personal journey for truth takes him... intervening only if there are reasons for concern that the road he might take could be harmful to himself or others...

Not inviting him to events because he has some kind of goofy "label" on his forehead now (he had the AUDACITY to be honest and open! How evil!!) is all about their protecting their OWN backsides. It has NOTHING to do with his spirituality or worth as a person....

Echo on the professional intervention asap advice, too, dmouse.

Please let us know how he gets through this....

lauralisa

patio34

Dear DMouse,
I'm so sorry you and your son are having to go thru this. But he's fortunate to have such a caring family to help weather this storm. We're all thinking of you and your son. I hope he can continue to cultivate his friendships at school & overcome the cult treatment.

Pat

anewperson

ONE SOLUTION: Since Benjamin sees it's bad but doesn't want to lose his mother and half-friends, one possibility is to not lose them, but to get them out as well as himself or at least make them friendlier to his views and less to the pedophile-upholding elders.

The internet is full of liberating material. He can start mailing and leaving it about. When his mother and some of his half-friends are out, then he can also become free. And even if they don't exit they may break the disfellowshipping code of silence and associate anyway. Once people know in particular that all elders to stay elders must hide pedophilia, that is very liberating.

What would be best would be if he just left the Watchtower half-mother, half-friends. But again, if he can't do so at once then he/you can start preparing for it now. Also if he's considered suicide he might have a chemical imbalance requiring medication and counseling or, as you may also sense, he may simply be deeply depressed because of the situation. You and he know best. Keep the lines of communication wide open.

SEE?

anewperson

Many thousands of these type items have been emailed and otherwise distributed to help people liberate their loved ones from the Watchtower Society, after which there is less depression if simply because the distributing persons no longer feel "helpless" or hemmed in by the Watchtower Society. As said, one can also make up his/her own stuff but having something in hand at once can be invaluable, so here it is. Best to you and your son:

SHOCKING FACTS TOLD OUT OF LOVE TO THE CONGREGATION & PUBLIC: The Watchtower Society (WTS) over Jehovah's Witnesses (JWs) covers up child molestation and let pedophiles go door-to-door as proved at http://www.silentlambs.org (toll free 1 877-WTABUSE). WTS leaders say God opposes the UN but, until exposed, in 1991-2001 were a formal UN associate not just to use the UN's library as proved if you read the Nov 22, 1998 Awake magazine and 2nd entry at http://www.unhchr.ch/udhr/materials/articles.htm. 1 Cor 6:1 only says judge "trivial" things as in business, James 2:4-13 calls judging harmful, and Paul says the "majority" (2 Cor 2:6) followed his advice to shun a wrongdoer, meaning a Minority chose not to and yet he nowhere condemns them. In contrast the WTS has formal Judicial Committes destroying families via numerous formal renderings of disfellowshipment (severe shunning).

Acts 15:20 says abstain from blood but 1 Sam 14:32-5 says Saul's army ate unBLED meat to not starve and no verses show God not forgiving them. Christ says God also forgave David's eating temple holy bread and that God wants Mercy Not Sacrifice. (Mt 12) The May 22, 1994 Awake tells of 26 JW kids who died without transfusions, and by common sense in massive bleeding as in car wrecks blood expanders won't save lives http://www.ajwrb.org. About 3 JWs die daily earthwide from the unscriptural policy! (Blood On The Altar by David Reed) Why must anyone be endangered? JWs can form nonWTS groups united by LOVE, join another group or decrease donations & support to the WTS. Please make and use copies of this for years ahead. It was written out of love for our JW families and friends as well as the public's - yours too!

Francois

Yerusalyim and the others are right. Your son needs to be taken to a cult deprogrammer, someone who knows what they are doing, a professional. No plain old psychiatrist is gonna do the trick in my opinion. Your son is programmed. He needs deprogramming.

You're apparently the only person in his life that's got any compassion - get the boy the help he needs. And remember: jumpers don't talk, talkers don't jump. This could leap out at you as a surprise after it's too late to do anything about it.

Go, go, go, go.

Francois

sf

Excellent Lauralisa!

I concur fully with your post.

{{{{{dmouse and son}}}}}

sKally

anewperson

If he has the money to pay to get services from a deprogrammer that is good but if not truthful literature also deprograms, and a father's genuine loving concern is also powerful.

lv4fer

DO take this seriously and get him some professional help. Talk, Talk, TALK with him, show him you are there for him and that you love him.

"The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself."

Rita Mae Brown

anglise

Hi DM

Yes your son needs lots of help both professionally and from those of his family who still love him unconditionally.
Does he still want to go to the meetings?
If not is it possible to get an agreement from your wife not to take him?
We were able to get a legal undertaking from my ex sil that my gchild would not be involved in any JW activities when she is in his care even prayers at mealtimes and 'incidental' witnessing by other relatives etc. Could you do anything like this.
We also got a report from a psychiatrist which was given to the judge showing what a detrimental effect the dub teaching could be on a child.
Maybe its time to take the gloves of to protect your precious son.
Please feel free to email me if it might help.

A

My son contemplates suicide.

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