OMG, when we were fading, the worst thing that could happen was a surprise visit. Now I believe they purposely did not schedule a convenient time. My mom would always find someone to stop them if she knew. One JW male ended up screaming at our door, with attached houses, imploring her to "love him" and return to Jah. The neighbors must have big ears. She told him to leave immediately.
I will never forget my much younger sister ripping a Pilgrim construction paper creation from school off the wall and discarding it in the trash with all haste. In fact, when I was in law school she telephoned me in a panic. We have a Christmas tree we loved up for the holidays. My JW aunt decided to use a family bathroom. Altho I was out for almost a decade, I told her to wrap it in old sheets and throw it off the fire escape.
If it were me, I would like to have a choice whether to shave or not. I was a coward. My aunt pretended she did not see our glorious Christmas tree. Friends of friends flock to see my personal tree. I assembled it with such devotion. Sometimes I am glad in the aftermath that I had to make a moral choice. People pleasing is my addiction.
If it were my spouse, not telling me would go to the very core of marriage. Mulling over a decision helps. Of course, an email will stop the Witness from calling. Maybe your hubbie can bring someone else out. How close can they be if the JW friend has no clue to your husband's mind set.?