As for JWs don't go to war ... the bible doesn't say GOVERNMENT/NATIONS, which are comprised of people/citizens, shouldn't go to war. In order for you to perhaps re-direct your wife's thinking on these issues you yourself have to know where you stand on this. Do a research on war within the Christian perspective, read papers, articles on the theory of Just War ... Jesus said: Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends. Jesus was not jus speaking about himself, he was talking about love people just as he has loved us to the point of dying for others, SOLDIERS do this. The bible says that government exists because God allows it, and they have the SWORD. Government MUST defend its citizens. JWs treat soldiers as they treat the blood banks, they only enjoy their benefits!!!!!
On being the only ones preaching ... they are NOT unique in going door to door ... as far as really preaching the GOSPEl they don't do this... look at Trinity Broadcasting Network spreading the Gospel through Satellite all over the world, look at the Christian ministries that put bibles in air balloon to be dropped in mountains, amazone, forbidden places, etc. Look at the Christian ministries that give away solar powered radios like ipods with the bible and the message of salvation, the TRUE CHRISTIAN GOSPEL ...that God has provided by the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ a way for human kind to be restored invididually into a forgiven relationship with Him through personal faith in JESUS CHRIST (not mention of a WATCHTOWER CORPORATION IN NEW YORK CITY). In summary, learn what's the true Christian Gospel is and if really JWs are preaching it ...