train up a child...with a squeegee...

by wheelwithinwheel 35 Replies latest jw friends

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  bitter mango

  hmmm wheel, don't be too quick to jump to conclusions. i home schooled for 2 years and i completed my 4 years of highschool during that time. i also home schooled for part of grade 6. i found that it was a lot harder work than going to a regular school.. but i also found that i had a lot more privledges than all my buddies who went to mainsteam schools. i didn't have to do my work in the same hours as all my friends, i got to sleep in because i always got my work done at somepoint during the day.. it didn't matter if i started at 8:30 in the morning or 8:30 at night. and yes, i could even fit 2-3 days work into 1 day and could take a day off without having to explain myself. so maybe the kid was going to do his work later that day, or maybe he really was given the day off.. but you have no idea what their arrangement is so you can't say that this is such an awful thing.

  about the kid being at work with his pops, i think that's fine too. i went to work with my dad every single day when i was a kid (once i started going to school, i got dropped off at the shop after school). and i was usually doing some work for him too, helping out around the shop and what not. big deal. when i got a little older i was lucky if i saw my parents at any point during the day. mom worked two jobs so i only saw her on the weekends, if that (she was always busy running errands and stuff). dad moved out and i didn't see him for months at a time, sometimes years. it's like that for a lot of kids these days, so don't get all pissy about a dad and son spending time together, even if it is spent doing 'work'.

  as for you thinking that home schooling is a 'crying shame' .. i have to agree with you in some cases. i had a ton of friends who were home schooled but it just didn't work out and by grade 8 or so they we're just dropouts (and most with their parents permission). and sadly, too many of these kids never went back, a lot of them work their asses off at low paying jobs now. but it really depends on the kids (how they learn, how focussed they are, etc.), the parents (they MUST set a stable and fuctional working enviroment, as well as basic school-like rules for the kids to follow and ensure they follw them, etc.) and like lisa said, resources. you've got to have the proper resources when you home school a kid!

  but home schooling isn't always a bust. it also works for a lot of people too. i dropped out of school in grade 9 and got myself a job without any intntions of ever going back. after a year i got really bummed out and thought i would give it another try. after being turned away from 5 highschools because of my 12% GPA and my highschool record i decided to take a few correspondance classes. it took me awhile to get used to it but when i did, i did very well. after finishing grade 9 in 3 months i started taking advanced section b courses. 2 years later i finished highschool with a 94% GPA. i went from being a 13 year old droupout to getting a full paid university scholarship. many of my friends also decided to do home correspondance courses and they all in university doing very well now (expect for one ). so it DOES work for some people.

  runningman, that yahtzee = a math lesson is so funny it's sad.

  when you blow out like a dead star it reminds me how uniform your beautiful is
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  RunningMan

  There are cases where home schooling works well. For example, a child may learn more by living in another country and home schooling, than they would with a more traditional upbringing. As well, some parents are very disciplined and skilled at teaching.

  However, now that I've got the exceptions out of the way, there are numerous drawbacks:
  - lack of development of social interaction skills
  - lack of diversity in viewpoint of teachers. How many of you had some teachers who really reached you, while others just didn't get through? Well, home skilled kids have only one teacher.
  - lack of discipline. I'm not talking about the rod, here, but the schedule of getting down to work every day.
  - lack of skilled teachers. Most parents are not trained to teach. They are also not trained in specific academic areas.

  Really, home schooling gets an unjustly bad name. Many home schooling parents use it because they are afraid of the world. They want to over protect their children and ensure that they do not get influenced by outsiders. This is the wrong reason. If you hide most of the planet from children, you are preventing their normal development.
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  KistByQpid

  Bitter Mango,

  I couldn't agree with you more! I'm not a JW, never been a JW...so maybe my opinion doesn't carry much weight here. However, I do homeschool my kids and have for the past 6 years. Prior to that, I worked in the public schools. I believe parents who choose to homeschool and then fail to uphold their responsibility, give homeschooling a bad name. As far as I know, homeschooling IS legal throughout the United States, with each state having various conditions. Every year, I must file a letter of intent. This means that I MUST comply with annual standardized testing (meanwhile the kids in ps are only subjected to these tests 3 times throughout their school career), I must maintain attendance, scope and sequence of studies, as well as their test scores. If I fail to do so, guess what? My letter will not be signed by the Sup. of Schools. Does it matter that I worked there? No. A parent must have a minimum of 1 year college/ 45 credit hours OR take a State approved course in homeschooling. I have a B.S. in Human Development...no problem. Does this mean I am "qualified" to make a comment of "socialization?" Yes. I believe it is a word that many people use without much consideration. What about another big word, teleology? What is the purpose of education? If I remember correctly I was often harshly reminded, "Your not here to socialize!" LOL. Unless you live at the North Pole, social interaction, maturity and development occurs naturally...institutionalized education does not have a monopoly on socialization or learning. Truely, education occurs WHEREVER learning happens. I live in an area that has slightly more than 3,900 homeschoolers in three school districts. They are extremely organized and offer a wide range of support services and activities. Actually, most homeschoolers I know have as many, if not more activities and lessons than most ps kids I know. Maybe JW homeschoolers are different? I'm not homeschooling for religious reasons or attempting to isolate them from worldly people.

  However, I believe homeschool parents need to excercise discernment when it comes to taking their kids with them during normal school hours. My husband and I own a business and our kids enjoy going with their dad from time to time. I'm a stickler about only allowing this on Saturdays...rarely during the weekdays. Otherwise, people who don't know that we school 6 weeks on and 1 week off, year around, may wonder what we're doing. It doesn't matter that ps kids have regular "inservice days" off as well as various holidays and break times...in our neighborhood, these are the kids that are left at home/latchkey kids. The general public KNOWS and accepts this as the "norm" and doesn't pass judgement. Homeschoolers on the other hand, are scrutinized and held to a higher standard. Anyone who chooses this educational option, really needs to do what works best for their children BUT understand the level of commitment and resources homeschooling requires.
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  bitter mango

  runningman, that's a good post! and very very true. i re-read my last post in this thread and realized that the people i know who did not succeed at all in home schooling were the ones who started at a young age. the ones who did do well were those who went to regular schools as kids and then decided in their highschool years to homeschool.
  interesting.

  i agree that when parents are trying to shelter their children from the outside world by home schooling, it will backfire and cause more harm than good in the end because the kid's development is prevented. though i'm sure some home schooling jw parents would argue that their children get enough "social" interaction at meetings .

  kist, i'm glad you follow the rules and the laws. however, a lot of home schooling parents don't.. people cannot see how many hours you are putting into teaching, they don't see how many hours you are making your children put into the work, etc. that is where the problem is. too many parents don't follow the rules and they let their kids fall behind, and those are the ones giving it a bad name.

  when you blow out like a dead star it reminds me how uniform your beautiful is
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  Yerusalyim

  The overwhelming vast majority of those whom I've met that homeschool have well adjusted intelligent kids who are generally well advanced compared to their public school peers. Most homeschoolers have some sort of group "studyhall" and play time with other homeschoolers so the kids do get social interaction. Field trips, etc too, plus their regular neighborhood friends.

  I've also seen some REALLY botched home schooling. Neither I nor my wife have the patience to home school. At least we're smart enough to know that.

  YERUSALYIM
  "Vanity! It's my favorite sin!"
  [Al Pacino as Satan, in "DEVIL'S ADVOCATE"]
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  forgetmenot

  I've never been home schooled. Lately we've had a continuous wave of home schooling in our congregation. I guess it can work but it is hard to tell. You have to admit that a lot of JW's are schooling their children for "the new system". This will cause problems.

  On a side note, when I tell people I used to be a Jehovah's Witness, they tell me that "the saddest thing about the JW kids is that they didn't get to celebrated holidays." I say, "no" it was being alienated from having a real social life. The congregation setting basically gives you three to five (if you are lucky) people who have to be your closest and only friends. If you aren't compatible, so sorry, you still can't make friends with THOSE worldly people.

  I would guess that home schooling adds to these isolated feelings.
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  144thousand_and_one

  On a side note, when I tell people I used to be a Jehovah's Witness, they tell me that "the saddest thing about the JW kids is that they didn't get to celebrated holidays." I say, "no" it was being alienated from having a real social life.

  Sadder yet is the rampant exploitation of children that is encouraged by the JWs and implemented by parents. The organization avails itself of free child labor by encouraging parents to require their kids to "go out in service." This despicable practice is only one of many inappropriate child-rearing tactics espoused by an organization interested solely in its own continued expansion and financial success, regardless of the human cost.
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  Carmel

  Would a JW home schooling qualify for the "blind leading the blind"?

  carmel
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  terafera

  I have a ton of respect for the parents who are successfully homeschooling their children. It is a tough, thankless job that will produce rich rewards in the future.

  In the very beginning, when my son was 4, I fleetingly thought of homeschooling him. I couldnt stand the thought of some obnoxious bully snatching his sandwich during lunchtime, kids pushing him around or teasing on the playground. Then I realized how much he would suffer socially and changed my mind. I'm so glad I did... the teachers said because he is an only child, he was very shy and this year (first grade) he has come out of his shell alot. His teacher is wonderful and tells me he loves being around other kids.

  I dont look to public school as the main source of teaching for my child. I look at it as a 'social' thing for him. If he learns anything in public school, great. I try to teach him everything at home, not in a strict or structured setting... just make it fun and interesting. When he was 3 he could read and he will be in a gifted class next year. The main reason was because I teach him things at home and dont rely on the teachers to do it.

  A funny thing about (some) homeschooled kids though.. I knew a family that was ultra-spiritual (or so they thought) and wanted to protect their son and daughter from the evil world. Those poor kids never knew how to relate to kids their age. During the assembly you could see them talking to adults, they didnt know how to talk to kids their own age. They were a little ..... um.. different. They didnt act like 'normal' kids.

  
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  target

  I homeschooled my son after 8th grade. He was 16 1/2 when he got his diploma. He went on to tech school and is now a highly paid computer engineer with a very outgoing personality.
  I saw many cases that were failures because the parents expected the kid to do it all on their own. Someone still has to play teacher.
  I homeschooled because of the bad enviornment and the constant fights that left him so stressed that he was constantly sick. All that changed when he got out of school.
  Ours was a success story.

  Target