Have I really left?

KateWild

It was a meeting night last night. I didn't go nor did I stay on JWN instead. Nugget gave me her time. We chatted for almost two hours. It was nice girlie human contact and more positive and wholesome than going to a meeting and sitting on the back row being ignored.

On Sunday, we are going swimming instead of the meeting. I am never going back to that destructive place again. Likewise I am not going to replace meetings debating on JWN about God's existance.

I am at work now, I have seen a JW couple on the ministry, they understand why I have left and told me not to give up. They told me to change halls. Humpphhh!!! They have seen me around the local comunity 3 times in the last two weeks. They have made the descision not to talk to me again. I have left things open with them, but if they are scared of Jehovah the GB. It's with them now. I pity them.

Once again, I want to give a big forum thank you to Nugget, she's great!

Are you struggling to leave? Have you had enough? What have you planned on a meeting night?

Kate xx

Julia Orwell

It's been said on this forum that you can leave the JW religion, but the JW religion doesn't leave you. It's hard to break free of what controlled your mind and actions and life for the best years of said life. I'm finding it hard too, but have been assured by many like Smiddy and others that it just takes time.

happy@last

I'm an all or nothing person, it is hard as my eldest child still goes to keep her mother company, if it wasn't for her I wouldn't give it a second thought about what day it is. Enjoy the freedom

KateWild

it just takes time.-julia

I would agree with that, I suppose we have to do something pro active and put effort in. But I don't think the JW in me will ever leave.

my eldest child still goes - Happy

My youngest goes with his dad, he is an Atheist now, and is being forced. I suppose I will always know he is there against his will on a Thursday.

Kate xx

quellycatface

Hiya Kate. My thoughts are with you. You sound like you've had a rough time.

I started making Sunday's special. Plan a meal, a day out or a film you've wanted to see for a while. I always found Sunday afternoons lonely after the meeting but now I enjoy them, as I am in control. It will take a while. Great start about the swimming. Not in the sea, I hope!!!! I really love a good Sunday lunch, so maybe you can do that after. Ask your guests to bring a contribution. If I was local, I'd bring a nice bottle of wine.

As for midweek meetings....I honestly, used to find them a chore. Does'nt that sound awful?? I never felt better when I came back either (like they say you should)!!! I also LOVE reading. Not many JW's seem to read fiction....Cos it's bad, or has swear words, sex etc in it... That pretty much sums up most modern books though. Unless you like Jane Austen, yeugh!!! Just a few ideas anyway.

Have a great day on Sunday okay? Thinking of you. XX

KateWild

Thanks quelly xx

AlphaMan

I am never going back to that destructive place again.

That is good to hear. You are too good for them and their blackballing of you to keep from RI'ing you back into the cult.

DJS

Kate,

Doing almost ANYTHING is better than wasting your time with the mind numbingly boring tripe dished out at the JW meetings. I don't know your situation but the sooner you leave completely in body, mind and spirit the better you will be. Your body needs to leave first. The further you get from JW land and its oppressive control the more you will wonder how it ever had any control over you.

KateWild

The further you get from JW land and its oppressive control the more you will wonder how it ever had any control over you.-DJS

This is a sad reality you point out DJS, my 12 yrd old will still be forced to go to meetings weekly with his dad. I can no way keep my distance sad to say. I need to know what they are filling his brain with and teach him critical thinking alongside the repetitive indoctrination. It's a shame, but I won't risk him getting baptised and the shunning me when he gets older.

I suppose I need to accept the GB have some element of control over me, but I will use this to the advantage of any who are waking up. Looks like I am in the x-JW community for the forseeable future.

Kate xx

Phizzy

Someone once said on here that for every year you were a JW it takes a month to get free, 20years=20 months.

I am sure this is Scriptural, there must be a "Month for a Year" formula in that there Bible somewhere ! LOL

This is only a "rule of thumb" obviously, but use it, because if after the required time, (in my case I am just about at the End of the Appointed Time), has elapsed, and you are still thinking "Oh, its Meeting night, what shall I do?" then you have some work to do.

It never occurs to me now that it is "Meeting Time", it has faded away, that feeling.

The closest I get to a flash back is when driving around my area I sometimes think, " We used to call on all these homes !", but even a thought like that is now rare.

Time really is a great healer, don't be one of those that they can say about: "You can take the girl out of the religion, but you cannot take the religion out of the girl".

Continue your journey away from the cult in a steady way, physically there may still be a connection, but make yourself mentally free, one day you will feel as though you never were a JW.

Have I really left?

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