The following is a letter written to the eight man Judicial Committee set up on Monday night to deal with the Pandelo family. (typically there are three members to a Judicial Committee) The Committee was handed this letter and the Pandelo family walked out. They have yet to receive a response as to a decision.
May 6, 2002
Body of Elders of the Bradley Beach Congregation
English Congregation
Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Watchtower bible and Tract Society
200 Watchtower Drive
Patterson, NY 12363-9205
To the Elders of Bradley Beach English congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses
This letter is in response you your “invitation” to meet with your Judicial Committee concerning “allegations of apostasy”, based on your “evidence” and “witnesses” that you will bring forth.
First, I, Carl Pandelo and my wife Barbara Pandelo deny any allegations, or charges that you bring forth concerning the accusations of apostasy. We have done nothing to be ashamed of, immoral, or unscriptural, and we will not answer any charges except that we emphatically deny this accusation.
Second, in your letter to our attorneys you stated that you would “like us to be present and would like to help us if we have sincere doubts.” In response to this, we feel that as “shepherds” of the congregation, your statement that you want to “help” us is hypocritical since my wife has not attended the Kingdom Hall meetings since 1998 or I in the last two years or so. With the numerous visits of the Circuit Overseer during that time we have never once been contacted by the Bradley Beach Elders nor the Circuit Overseer to “help” us following the litigation of a civil trial against my father, one of Jehovah’s Witnesses accused of pedophilia, and sexually molesting our daughter. Following the trial involving the sexual molestation, I met with a Judicial Committee in Hackensack Congregation of Jehovah’s witnesses to being charges against A. V., the Presiding Overseer, for being untruthful on the witness stand. In the Judicial Committee, A. V. admitted before me and the other elders, W. G., and A. S. that he had indeed lied, when they pursued it with Brooklyn they were told to drop it. This was told to me by W. G. He informed me that although he indeed heard V. admit to lying, he could not do anything because he was at the mercy of Headquarters who did not get back to him.
Thirdly, in view of this and in view of the continual untruthfulness of the elders at the direction of Headquarters over the issues of the sexual molestation of our daughter, my wife suffered emotionally from the spiritual abuse inflicted on our family by those we loved and trusted. This was hurtful and damaging to us emotionally and spiritually and physically. For that reason, we have felt betrayed by our religious leaders, not just a few individuals, but especially from the total corrupt behavior of those taking the “lead” within the congregation and also at Bethel regarding the issues of child molestation. Being coined an “apostate” and shunned by those we cared about and trusted is unjust.
Fourth, I and my family have received letters and death wishes from “friends” (JW members) for speaking out about sexual abuse within the congregation. We were approached by the media and asked to tell our story regarding these issues. We did not seek out the media. We told the truth, which is what elders are unable to do. It is our right as parents to speak out and protect our children from predators who have been protected and hidden and given implied permission to molest again by your treatment of victims who came forward. If a predator is a family member in the Christian Congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses, other members of the molester’s family are expected to be silent even if they are victims, so as not to “bring reproach on Jehovah’s name.” The Bible warns against this saying, ”he that loves father or brother, sister or mother, more than me is not worthy of me.” Those are Christ’s Words. It is against Christian teaching to allow sexual abuse to perpetuate within the Congregations and discipline the ones who come out and speak out about it. It is my right as a parent to protect my youngest daughter from being exposed emotionally, and we, for this reason are unable to return to the Kingdom Hall meetings. Your choice has been to shun our family for taking this stand, and now with the program airing this month on Dateline, Watchtower has seen fit to send out letters with charges of “apostasy” and “causing divisions” to those of us who have given an interview with Dateline. It is you yourselves who have caused divisions within families, and you yourselves who have become apostates and you bear a heavy responsibility before our Grand Creator.
We will not go and meet with the body of elders or talk to them because they have betrayed our trust many times over the years in our ordeal over the sexual abuse issues. This culminated recently when C. H. called and tried to entrap us into saying what they wanted to hear for their Judicial proceedings, by having S. S. on the phone without our knowledge for several minutes before. This is shameful and unchristian and worthy or our highest lack of trust and respect for someone whom we loved and trusted.
Warm Christian Love,
Carl and Barbara Pandelo
also signed by daughter.