Yes twenty-five years ago today we sent in our DA letter. Some regrets, not about leaving the cult obviously, but sometimes when I read about people slowly fading and keeping in touch with family and friends I wonder if we should have done that. Of course it was before the internet in 1989 so we didn't know about people fading.
One day we were driving along and we had been talking about moving congregations because we knew something was wrong but of course we thought it was local. Then I suddenly said why don't we just rent a cottage somewhere, just us and the cat, in the countryside, not go to the meetings and just be on our own for a while, just us. Yes my authentic self was surfacing. My husband said no we can't do that. Now if I hadn't had my brain turned to mush by illness and five years of clinical depression I would have argued with him. I gave in, we moved congregations, they were just as bad.
We found CoC in the library, saw TTATT, sent in our letter and the rest is history. Sometimes I see that moment in my mind as one of those pivotal moments, you know? I wish we'd got away by ourselves in that cottage with our little cat and slowly deprogrammed and faded.
Having said that, phew quite emotional, I think my family would have hounded us and knowing the people we were we would have blurted it out that it's corrupt and a false religion now. Then the shit would have hit the fan anyway. So I suppose because of the way we were, honest, straightforward, that was probably the only way it could have gone. We were born-ins, taught not to lie, that's what I mean.
Anyway we left, got degrees, good jobs, bought a little house, had a beautiful baby girl, did some travelling. Had almost twenty years together out of the borg before he died. So I suppose we did alright. We were shunned by my family and it was hard work making new friends. Nothing is perfect is it?
So how about you, any regrets in the way you left?