by Strawberryfieldsforever 57 Replies latest jw friends
Just tell that you left the WTS. more on your initiative rather than listening or reading apostate information.
Tell her you don't read anything much about the JWS, that you left out a lack of believability and that your fine
with her still being a devoted believer.
.
All you can do from this point, if your really want to keep a line of communication with her.
Express yourself not as an opposer but accepting of her own personal beliefs.
Be kind and open .
All the best.
Deny, deny, deny!!!! (lawyer speak).
Don't give volunteer any information. You are keeping the truth from her NOT to hurt her feelings, instead of upsetting her and putting her in an awkward poistion.
My Mum does'nt know I am disassociated because it would break her heart. I shall burn in hell but hey ho!!! At least it'll be warmer than here.
Seriously though, keep posting on here and venting. I can understand you feel guilty for not fessing up but in this case, it's truly the best option.
Take care. X
In this case I would lie, lie, lie. Simply answer you are not reading any apostate material and then change the subject. Ask more about her.
She said this in a seizure of cultishness, meeting her obligations so to speak. I think deep down she would be just as devastated at the loss of contact as you would be. So soothe the wild beast and keep talking to the natural mom.
OTWO - I love your Bill Clinton solution: 'You can define "apostate" on your own and be telling the truth.' I think it is better to deflect than to lie outright. But if some theological warfare is necessary that is a matter for strawberryfieldsforever I guess as to whether she is comfortable with that and also whether she can carry it off.
I can flip a Witness (temporarily) out of cult mode in a snap by changing the topic of conversation. I figure the longer they are "normal" the longer they get used to how it feels. It feels pretty good, as I am a smokin' good conversationalist.
This mom needs the contact, even as she stupidly tries to find a reason to cut it off.
Agree with other posters. She is too old to change. Just assure you are not doing the things she is afraiud of and then ask about her or tell a funny story from the past couple days in your house.
This mom needs the contact, even as she stupidly tries to find a reason to cut it off.
Totally agree Jgant but your kind of playing a game of Russian roulette by taking that discerning chance.
It has to be done so by a capable person and be directed toward a flexibly minded receiver or you risk
having the whole effort back fire, creating an even worse situation.
Maybe it would help to assure her that you have no intention to trying to push any apostate ideas on her.
You just want to be her daughter.
Yep. DO NOT TELL HER TTATT. She can't handle it. You must use "apostacratic warfare" in dealing with her. Your Mom will need you as time passes and none of the WTs predictions come true. You need to treat her as you would treat someone with a mental disorder. DO NOT TOUCH HER EARS!
DD
Thank you for the advice. I am writing down so many things on paper from all of you. I need to have it beside me when I write her the letter. I like your advice "searcher" and "a bible student". You have all been so kind. I will keep writing idea's down and not be too quick to write my Mom. I have to be very careful what I say.
Do you think I am on the right track trying to make her remember good times and the love of her family? If I can keep the lines of communtication open, should I keep trying to snap her out of this fog she is in? I know there are so many of you in pain like I am. I appreciate your coments and will listen to your advice.
Strawberry
