Any Suggestions on what to say if elders ask why you stopped going in FS?

BU2B

I was curious what might be some good things to say if I am questioned by the elduurs about my decline in FS. Anything too honest may get me a JC (although that would be for the best in the end..) The CO visit is this week so they may be getting more agressive than usual

jollyj

Too many creative ways to count time for their question to even be a factor.

quellycatface

Say you are depressed and anxious, you've therefore lost your confidence in the ministry. End of.

Wasanelder Once

Use their own strategy. Pad your time, it doesn't mean anything anyway and it will get them off your back. Eventually make them call you for your time in six months and just dont be available. I assume you are missing meetings like a good little preapostate. Just say you are doing more informal witnessing due to a busy schedule, they will back off, then gradually let it go down an hour a month or so and then skip a month in three months. Just let it flow. This will get them off your back so you become lousy association and people leave you alone, they sure as hell wont try to help you. Otherwise tell them to shove it if you like. Man I hate that feeling of having these self appointed saviors on your ass.

ABibleStudent

Hi BU2B, DITTO what quellycatface wrote. Within the last 6 months someone suggested acting as if you are incompetent when performing WTBTS duties.

Last November I greeted two JWs at my brother's house. One JW appeared to be a Bible Student (new recruit) and the other person appeared to be more experienced. The Bible Student (new recruit) gave the sales pitch. She mumbled and seemed very scared during her presentation. I could barely understand her.

If you told the elders what quellycatface wrote and behaved a little distracted/frightened/incompetent, would the elders pressure you as much in the future?

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

Giordano

What Wasanelder Once said.

Or you could point with pride at your 1039 posts here......lol

Oubliette

The depression card is a popular and largely successful play, but it only delays the inevitable and makes you appear weak.

Consider this line of reasoning:

YOU: There are some things that have happened recently that I find disturbing ...

Elder: What are those?

YOU: You see, that's the problem. I feel neither comfortable or even safe discussing them with you!

Elder, confused: Why is that?

YOU, laughing at the irony: Well, obviously I can't tell you that because I don't feel safe!

At this point the discussion is essentially over. You've made a valid point that the elders cannot address. You've also reasserted your own personal boundaries in an unassailable way.

I suspect the elders would, feeling very uncomfortable themselves, offer a few vague platitudes and beat a hasty retreat.

If they press it, you could reaffirm, "Look, I've told you all I'm going to tell you and I'm not going to talk about it any more," and add, "I suspect you're going to be hearing a lot of people telling you this in the near future, ... if you haven't already!"

jgnat

Hubby's planned to lie, lie, lie. He told a Witness that we lost our renters and he's been living in the apartment out of town (and conveniently without a Kingdom Hall) for the past few months. I tell him this will all catch up with him sooner or later.

BU2B

^^^ Very good Oubliette.. Thats thinking outside the box..

I report around 6 hours a month but the last few months have maybe gone out once a month as a passenger rolling around suburban/rural areas rolling to other peoples calls. Then its break time at a local diner and then home. I do this to keep peace in the home which unfortunately is important to me. I hve not been out the past month at all because of my wifes pregnancy, but she is riddled with guilt that she isnt doing enough.. So fustrating. I have had it. I dont really want the elders to even think I am active. I want this all to be over, but dont want to stress out my wife too much, but that is at the expense of my sanity. My daughter is now 4. That about the age of remembering things. I cannot lie to her. I fear my wife will leave me, afraid for her childrens future. I m afraid to lose my wife and be all alone. My parents will cry and wail and shun me guaranteed. Its going to be so hard to take. I am agnostic and do not pray.. Its a lonely feeling. I have no siblings. My moms entire family is JW. My only bright spot is that my dad is the only one on his side of the family who is JW. Although we were never as close s we should be with most of them at least some people from my past will still talk to me, and will likely gravitate to me when they hear my story.. None of them ever liked the JWs anyways. My late Grandfather told my dad he would have rather him be gay than to be a JW.. Anything but them. They will be happy about my exit, but sad about me losing my family. I will try to contact some DF JW on facebook when the time is right. If I did that now I would be outed.

----I just lie and report something like..

6 hour

4 magazines

1 Study

4 RV

Enough to keep questions at bay for now.

Watchtower-Free

Play the depression card .Most elders do not know what to do and avoid you .

Any Suggestions on what to say if elders ask why you stopped going in FS?

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