For those who feel that their life has been stolen

by stillin 47 Replies latest jw friends

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  LoisLane looking for Superman

  Oh, Okay. We are glad for that.

  Since you are hidden and we do not know you, might I ask about the rape angle? Did your friends do it? I understand it is about making the person feel power over someone.

  It certainly is not about sex.

  What kind of home environment did you have, or not have? (You do not have to answer. It is none of my business).

  I studied with a girl who's only son ended up in Pelican Bay, during the riots. He was in the riots. Proud of that. I knew him only as a sweet little boy.

  LoisLane
• 

  stillin

  You know how guys are. Some like it easy. Some like a challenge. But they all like it. For the purpose of this thread, let me just say that I was the "easy" type before the JW thing. Then I married and began a long, long journey into monogamy. I am rather pleased with myself for maintaining my loyalty to my wife. Although it has become more of a celibate thing lately. But that is something that I don't think I would have if I had never gotten into the Witness thing.
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  stillin

  While I'm at it, I may as well include alcohol and drugs. Being a witness for 30 years kept my drinking moderate and I stopped using drugs recreationally completely. And that's how things will stay unless marijuans is legalized...then I'll think about it. The Witness life kept me out of prison.
• 

  Violia

  I live in the Bible Belt and Stillin, you could have received all kinds of help from any Fundy religion. Many function very similar to jws.

  If that was the case you'd be on some other board telling folks how you gave your life to Jesus and he has kept you from womanizing and drug and drink all these years. Everyone needs a reason to get up in the am, if Jws are helping you , great. But you could have gotten this help at any decent religion and or AA, a good therapist.

  I knew elders who lived double/ triple lives and smozed with the Bethel folks, fringe jws and died all honorable men. The wreckage they left behind them is all under a rug that maybe one day will be looked under.
• 

  snare&racket

  ...we are the fish that got away.....

  Thank Zeus then drink, be merry and marry.....
• 

  stillin

  I have been saying the same thing through this whole thread, Violia.
• 

  blondie

  In my case, my childhood was stolen from me in a horrible way. According to the WTS people can die and be resurrected and get their life back, but not your childhood, the WTS teaches you come back as an adult (unless you died as a child) so you won't get your childhood back ever. I found though that holding onto resentment over this was poisoning my current life and thus my future. I refused to let my father or the WTS poison the rest of my life. I never said to "get over it" that's impossible to do completely. But you can reduce the effect and find joy in today and tomorrow's today.
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  Violia

  Not exactly Stillin. I am reading that you find a bit of good in a glass of posion( to use one of the wts favorite examples ). Since you have not been hurt, well ok. The wts is not so bad b/c it has helped some folks- folks who could have received this "help" from other sources. I believe Outlaw's post was the best on this- nothing really good has come from the wts . They kept many of us in the Org. b/c " where is there to go?" Lots of places Stilla, lots of places. The same people who helped you destoryed others lives.

  I was born into the working poor. We were not trash, just poor. My father worked everyday of his life. I got my work ethic from him. My mom was ill all my/ her life. I turned to the jws at an early age for a family. The jws were happy with me ( I was a wonderful example for young people) until I was old enough to date. I was then Selma from Peyton Place, the poor girl from other side of tracks who they liked and were ok to clean their homes , but not date their sons. I saw then that jws were no different than everyone else. In fact, for a religion who was so supposedly raceless and classless, they proved to be just like everyone else. Liars. I should have left then but it is hard to leave when all your family are jws. also, I thought I could prove to them I could "rise above" my beginnings . I tried so hard, but failed. Many other things happened to me as a child and teenager/adult in this Org. They hurt my parents, me and my family . I will not forget or forgive. They don't deserve it. They gave me nothing...nothing. There is a saying " you can't kill me I am already dead.". That is what they did to 3 generations of my family.
• 

  whathehadas

  I feel for you Magnum. I was so angry after reading your post, I laughed in pain. I'm still young but I feel the same way. Born in and having some good years taken away from me by that cult. My years in may be small in comparison to yours but it stings the same. I TRY to not think about that cult day to day, but it's hard when you're constantly reminded of it. When you come across people in convos about their life and think of yours. The experiences they had growing up with their friends from school. Just thinking of my experience in high school is just a empty blur. I had chances to connect with so many people but passed it up because of the WT rules. I was SO scared of the "world". I kick myself(figuratively) everyday because of this. The journey to rebuilding your life after the WT is so tough.
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  stillin

  metaphor, anybody?

  We all made a journey, let's say in a Toyota. Some have suggested that it could have been a Ford, and they're right. Another religion may have done as poorly or worse Or better. But it was the Toyota that got us where we are. Yes, it was a high maintenance trip for me, too, in that vehicle. I fixed and adjusted and changed tires constantly, etc, and got this far. Some of you had unbelievable problems with the vehicle. Sorry to say that I may have driven past some of you while you were on the side of the road. (I was told that you might be dangerous!)

  yes, the Toyota I drove was a piece of crap! I'm. never getting back into it again. Yes, they were lousy years in general and I really don't think I need a car at all(or another religion.) I stopped making payments on it when I realized how over rated and over priced it was.

  When I tell you that it ran and that it got me to another place, I'm not lying or imagining things. If you resent me for that, so be it. I'm sorry if I could have helped you at any point and I missed the opportunity.

  I take my wife to meetings and assemblies. I make no bones about greeting most of the DF'd kids that walk in. I want them to see that there is love OUTSIDE of the parameters of the Borg.