Disfellowshipping and reinstatement

by Lynnie 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  Lynnie

  So I was visiting my older cousin who has been out of the JW's for many years but is still favorable

  to the whole nonsense and seems to be on the fence still after 35 years and she asked me "have you ever

  thought about going back?" and I told her that I was far too damaged from the treatment over the past

  35 years to consider it. And I said "well if I didn't have to grovel at the elders feet for a year or more before I

  was left back in that would be a consideration too. First she said that "oh you shouldn't focus on the human aspect"

  Really? Then she said "oh I don't think they do that anymore (meaning having to grovel at the elder's feet)" and I'm

  absolutely certain they still do no matter how long you have been out. I asked her if she was going back and of course

  didn't get a definitive answer! She was the one that told me oh so many years ago that you could leave the JW's

  at anytime and she did with absolutely no consequences. When I did a year after her I was stalked by elders for

  2 years! Has anyone else heard of this? That you can just start right back up where you left off?
• 

  LostGeneration

  So she is not formally DF'd right? That is what I'm getting from the "she left without consequence" part.

  If you are inactive, they won't hold a formal reinstatement committee, so it could vary wildly on what they would do with/to her if she came back to the hall. It could just be a brush up study and then back into service/meetings/the rest of the bull.

  But a formally DFd people have to go sit in the back of the hall, then grovel at their feet after probably six months minimum.

  Not sayin' it makes any sense! Just sayin' how it works.
• 

  jgnat

  Hubby was never disfellowshipped, simply faded away. When he came back it took more than two years to be approved for field service. Now, there was some complicity on my part. I made sure the elders knew about at least one of his indiscretions when they were on the verge of approving him the first time. They were so ticked off he had to change congregations to get approved.

  So yes, grovelling, very human and humiliating grovelling is involved. No Holy Spirit discernment in sight.
• 

  Crazyguy

  You need to get this woman some ttatt asap.
• 

  Lynnie

  You are correct, LostGeneration. She met a nonbeliever and married him 3 months after

  she met him to avoid any meeting with the elders (PO at that time) regarding premarital

  sex I"m sure. But no one bugged her or stalked her like they did me after she got married.

  I've heard of the inactive ones getting "reactivated" but wasn't really sure what that meant.

  In the meantime I need to let my naive cousin know that it's just not as simple as she thinks for

  me to join back up like she thinks it is. Yes she needs the TTATT badly but I don't think she would be

  receptive.
• 

  a watcher

  jgnat, did your husband ever find out that you sabotaged him?
• 

  nonjwspouse

  wowsa jgnat, that was, um, a potential blow up. Did he know? How did he react?

  I have't been in a position to cross that line. At one point I would have, now I doubt I would..... potentially counterproductive.
• 

  Apognophos

  With all due respect, Lynnie, your cousin has a point. It's true you shouldn't have to grovel at the elders' feet and sit in the back of the Hall for 6 months or more to be reinstated (if you are indeed DFed, otherwise things may be easier), but only because it isn't the truth, right? If it were the truth, shouldn't you be willing to humble yourself to get back in?

  See, you gave her an easy clay pigeon to shoot down by making it sound like you're just too proud to go back. Next time, if you are better prepared, you can give her a response like, "I couldn't go back, knowing what I know now. There's no way they have the truth." And when she asks what you mean, you can have some TTATT prepared, whether it's about the blood doctrine, flip-flops, etc.
• 

  jgnat

  He had not told the elders about me and at that point we'd been married several months! I did not think it right that the take a spiritual role where that sort of deception was over his head. Oh, he knows that I blew the lid on that one. I showed up at the Kingdom Hall and sat beside him. He hustled some elders together to confess. Problem solved.

  I did not sabotage my husband; I sabotaged the WTS's programming.
• 

  Lynnie

  Yes I'm DF'd Apognophos. I was most amazed by my cousin's lack of knowledge that there is still that policy in place that

  you need to sit in the back of the hall forever until the elder's decide you are worthy enough. She was trying to tell me

  "things have changed so much" but couldn't really say what. Perhaps more lenient or some such? I'll have to follow

  up with her to see what she meant by that. oh and I do find it interesting that she's not exactly running back herself!