Could it be that Jehovah is punishing me for leaving his religion?

by Julia Orwell 43 Replies latest jw friends

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  cultBgone

  Julia, you rock and you know it. It's just that we were all taught to respond to how "others" viewed us, we were never taught to trust in ourselves and our abilities.

  I mean, the crap that happened to people (as someone wisely pointed out) was NEVER big j's fault, why....it must be SATAN (a little church lady humor for those in the US). Really??? How stupid is that. Good things must be a reward from j but never bad things, nooooooo. It's all so stupid but we all ate it for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks. No wonder it's so hard getting out, we are all full of this nonsensical thinking!

  You, my dear, obviously have better things ahead! Everything happens for a (good but not-yet-understood) reason.

  I'm old. Trust me. You will continue to be awesome. And when things work out so much better than you planned....you'll see what I mean.

  For now, go have fun with dad and spend his money. Keeeeeeep smiling, Julia girl! It's gonna be great! HUGSSSSSSSSSSS
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  NAVYTOWN

  First of all.....there is no 'Jehovah'.....whatever happens,happens......there is no Sky-Daddy causing anything to happen, whether good or bad.....just remember that it is your own effort that will determine your future. Keep plugging away and don't get discouraged. Best wishes!
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  Pete Zahut

  I completely understand your thinking pattern. After being a lifelong Witness, I left the organization on my own about 7 years ago and expected, in the back of my mind that things might fall apart because God would no longer be blessing me (as if he was anyway). A few weeks later I got the best job I've ever had. Full benefits, pension, great people, interesting work etc. Then the economy fell apart a few months later and while thousands were getting laid off all over the City, I got a big raise. I then began to wonder in the back of my mind if Satan was helping me !! I realized that they (JW's) had it set up so that whether things were going well or going badly, you could find a way to blame it on some magical outside force. Other than losing my old network of friends, it's been one improvement after another and little by little the old superstitious mindset is wearing off.

  Seven years later, things are still going well but once in awhile I catch myself going back to that old mindset when there's an earthquake somewhere. The years of "disaster preparadness training" will probably always be something we deal with but with time, one gets better at counteracting the old mantras we had cemented in our minds.

  I hope things improve for you soon and you won't feel that the universe or God or anything is against you. I've had times when it seems like that is so but then for whatever reason, your efforts pay off. Then just as quickly you can start to see reasons why the universe or God is helping you. I think it's all about persistance, timing and being prepared when some good coincidence happens your way, you're ready to go.
• 

  JWdaughter

  Life is tough sometimes. For those in and out of the Borg. The beauty of your situation NOW is that you are out of the Borg, so it is just one LESS shitty thing to have to deal with while dealing with the others. Good thing is that you have a dad who will take you out to play. Family is worth more than a job and you still have yours. So many JWs just abandon theirs if they don't play the game. You didn't do that. You are not any kind of screw up, its just a cycle in your life. You are in the agitating cycle. After the spin out, you will start filling up again!
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  Hortensia

  That sucks! Keep looking, one foot in front of the other. You'll get another job soon, and you're right about getting more qualifications, too. That always helps.
• 

  smiddy

  Julia

  Jehovahs witnesses breed superstition . Only good things happen to JW`s and not bad things ? You know thats not true.

  Take heart girl , one door closes , another one opens up . (sooner or later )

  smiddy
• 

  berrygerry

  A few weeks later I got the best job I've ever had. Full benefits, pension, great people, interesting work etc. Then the economy fell apart a few months later and while thousands were getting laid off all over the City, I got a big raise. I then began to wonder in the back of my mind if Satan was helping me !! I realized that they (JW's) had it set up so that whether things were going well or going badly, you could find a way to blame it on some magical outside force.

  I ALWAYS wrestled with Matt. 6:33 and the tests of Job. Are they not contradictory?

  The lesson of Job - if you serve God, you will receive tests of immense suffering and deprivation.

  Jesus said if you serve God, don't sweat it, everything will fall into place.

  I've asked many experienced elders and the OPOMC this dichotomy.

  Over DECADES, never a satisfactory answer.

  One sincere, ex-missionary that I respected - I shared a quote that I love: "If I would have known that life would give me what I asked, I would have asked for more." (Sadly, he said: "That's a worldly quote")

  Life IS what you make it.

  PERIOD.
• 

  Julia Orwell

  Hey all, thanks for understanding and supporting. I'm much better today as I did some work in a local school and then went to a job interview. I know the Jehovah thing is a load of hooey but losing my job triggered that old primal fear of the unknown and unpredictable that cults play on

  So once again I fall back on my teaching degree, the degree I was naughty to get as a jw!

  Ok, the reason they instantly terminated me from Movie World: I picked up some glasses that had fallen on the track of the slowest moving ride after I had moved the cars along. That's it. I think they just wanted to get rid of me. I've since heard that they fire people all the time for stupid stuff. Well screw them. It was like being in a police state anyway. Everything you did was jealously scrutinized and reported. It was actually starting to get to me. I might wait til the big year 12 tests are over end of September and then seriously start working on a long term career.
• 

  punkofnice

  Could it be that Jehovah is punishing me for leaving his religion?

  Sure. Why not?

  Well, TBH as you said it's the old mind control taking over.

  Jehovah is a strange god if he punishes you but hides paedophiles in the congregation.
• 

  Julia Orwell

  Also my cat was very sick and spent five days in cat hospital. She pulled through and although she's a bit haggard she's here with me now having a huge purr. If she had have died I would have really lost it yesterday when movie world sacked me. But she's here and I'm so relieved.