by minimus 19 Replies latest jw friends
My daughter was DF, i was an elder and never stopped communicating and doing things with her,
Those in the congregation also knew about it, elders knew but no one ever said a word to me.
They also knew i would tell them to go F$%$ themselves.
I wasn't about to throw my daughter away because of an interpretation of a few verses in the bible from idiots in NY.
It never really came up for me because I didn't really know any DFed ones, but in principle I refused to shun anybody unless I personally believed that they were not a good person. I did once try to engage a DFed person in a short (spiritually-oriented) conversation while at the Hall, but he politely shied away from me. I realized then that, while I might not see a problem with talking to DFed ones, that they might not want to be talked to.
I think only the Elders could with the purpose of helping them to come back into the fold. However,I did not shun anyone.
I let a young woman live with me and my wife for awhile that was dated raped then DF'd for it after she became pregnant and was to ashamed/embaressed (how many young girls go to the police after being raped not many) to go to the elders about it until the baby was starting to show. They obviously had no empathy and threw her out with the trash. This Cult is evil and I should of quit back then but just blamed 3 asshole elders instead of the whole religion.
i always talked to my aunts that were discoed i had about 3 that were discoed at the time
I never got how they would say you can talk to your disfellowshipped relatives if they live with you. If they didn't live there or moved away, even for a short time, they were shunned......Scripture to back that up??
I always made it a point to talk with disfellowshiopped ones, even helped a couple of them from one part of town to another. They were surprised that I did that, One in particular asked if I was worried about being disfellowshipped for talking with and helping him and his family. I told him I didn't give a damn what the elders or anyone else thought about it, You were my friend when a Jdub and now that you have been ejected you are still my friend. I don't let others pick out who I can and can't have a friendship with. His wife eventually left the dugs too, and they made sure to try and get rid of any residue of the bullshit that had gotten into his childrens mind. He started his own business as he had been working with/for a jdub elder prior to being ejected, so he started his business and became successful. Good for them.
I remember back when they started this nonsense saying shunning was actually an act of love, I even asked a visiting CO about it, asking how could acting like someone didn't exist be an act of love. I told him that was ridiculous and just an excuse to be hypocritical. It's a wonder I wasn't called to the back of the hall after that. No one ever said anything to me about it. Which is probably a good thing as i would have unloaded on them and probably gotten myself ejected.
After my wife's death several years ago and a complete lack of caring on the part of the local congregation that started my fade and I have never been back to a hall and never will again. The witnesses are acidic they are so blinded by bullshit they cant smell it evidently.
It depends. I wouldn't shun a family member, and I wouldn't withold assistance/help towards them if they needed it. I realize that it would cast me into bad status within the congregation for doing so, but, that wouldn't stop me either.
That being said, there are some in my cong that have been DF'd for smoking crack, and if you were to show them any invitation of kindness they would abuse that. They do get a smile now and then, and a coin is tossed into their cup when I see them downtown.
One of my best friends has beed disfellowshipped and I continued to talk to her like nothung happened. I do not believe it is a sin to talk to somebody and I think it is a missinterpretation of that verse they use. I hope it will be corrected at some point.
Pedos and drug dealers no. "Normal" types yes...on the sly.
