YES!!!!!! Shunning has backfired!!

by Dawn 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • Hmmm
    Hmmm

    Dawn,

    Not much to add except "good for you, and good for your son!"

  • Dawn
    Dawn

    Hi Gary:

    Fortunately, my husband never did join in with their games - he refused to go also when I wasn't invited. But somehow it didn't really hit them until my son decided he wouldn't go either.

  • JT
    JT

    U GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    Congratulations on your integrity-keeping ways!! Your son has seen who is Christ-like and who is not. Unfortunately, its not a game, so there are no winners or losers, and no one really comes out on top. I hope your son continues to see how your patience and long suffering have not been easy but they have shown what you are made of!

  • gsx1138
    gsx1138

    AWESOME!!! Your son sounds like a stand up guy. You are correct on the manipulation. The thing with JW is they think the world must revolve around them. Even if you've been gone for 150 years they'll try to force you into what they believe. I'm amazed you even conceded to letting your husband and son go but it seems to have paid off.

    gsx1138

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    Dawn you wrote: < Fortunately, my husband never did join in with their games - he refused to go also when I wasn't invited. But somehow it didn't really hit them until my son decided he wouldn't go either.>

    Glad to hear it. I hope you remembered to tell them that their standing by you while your relatives snub you is appreciated. To hear of another family staying together in spite of cruel parents and controling relatives makes me very happy. Thanks for sharing the good story.

    gb

  • saltiest
    saltiest

    Kudos to you and your son! I would've loved to see her face on the other end of the phone.

    It's interesting how JWs in general will treat those who have never been witnesses BETTER than those that are DF'd or DA'd. In your case, your husband and son. My mom will talk to and even ask about a good friend of mine from school who has never ever been a witness nor even religious. Shoot, she had a kid when she was 16 and my mom still loved her. But when I had my baby shower last year and invited a friend from an old congregation who was DF'd she said she couldn't come. And she never did. The funny thing, she missed out on the only baby shower I'll ever have (not having any more kids) just because someone MIGHT be there...and that friend never made it.

    I will never understand her "thinking".

    Alicia

  • dmouse
    dmouse

    Glad to hear it!

    I fully concur with what DakotaRed said.

    However, that's not the way they will see it, unfortunately. They will say that your son has been influenced by your evil apostate cunning and has turned to the dark side.

    Be ready for it.

  • Amazing
    Amazing

    Thanks Dawn, for sharing that outcome. It is great when our children see the religion for what it is and choose to see the difference between love in the family and brain-dead religious rules. You son's choice is not just a testament to him in making a loving and brave choice, but to you and your husband in giving him values that come out on top. Good job!!!

  • Lollylou
    Lollylou

    I am so happy for you as a Mom to have had your son not only stand by you, but to stand up for you!! What a great thing.

    I am previledged to have a son also who stood up for me and also by me when I was disfellowshipped. Michael was always a very loving and affectionate son. He would always save me a seat at the meetings when I was df'd. He would hug me when he saw me come in and even put his arm around me as we sang and hold my hand when we prayed at the meeting. Michael lived on his own at this time and was 22 and a devoted JW. After one such meeting, an elder approached Michael and told him if he didn't stop being so "affectionate" to his mother that the elders would view him as condoning my wrong doing (I remarried after my divorce without giving the elders any proof of adultery) and he could be DF'd too. Michael told him no one could tell him not to love and respect his mother, and that the Bible encouraged us to love and honor our parents, no ifs ands or buts about it. Michael never went back to the KH. He wrote a letter to the elders explaining how unchristian their behavior was. He proceeded to devour "outside" knowledge and investigate the Bible independently. He just graduated from the Speed School of Engineering at the University of Louisville.

    GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT!!!!! Congratulation on doing such a great job on your son and to your son for being a strong independent thinker!!

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