A Newbie Introduction

by patricia 35 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Nemesis

  Hello Patricia,

  If you have been a JW for so long you will need to detoxify yourself from all their programming. Your guilt is self created from beliefs you have allowed them to place in you, you will continue to feel this way until you re-evaluate your belief system. It will help you if you get some good information showing how God is not with the Watch Tower organisation, trust me this will help with the negative feelings a lot.

  Here are three books I recommend for you:

  'Crisis of Conscience' by Raymond Franz (He worked at the New York Bethel for 15 year, and was on the Governing Body for the last 9 of those years if you didnt know)

  'In search of Christian Freedom' by Raymond Franz

  'A Guide to Rational Living' by Albert Ellis, and Robert A. Harper.

  They can all be found at Amazon, or ordered via a good bookshop.
• 

  Mimilly

  Welcome to the board Patricia! Pull up some comfy pillows and spill your worries. Those who care will definitely be there for you. The rest - nevermind them.

  I had a hard time with prayer after my separation from the borg. Try the books other posters suggested, and in doing so, you'll be able to separated actual prayer from the horrible experiences you went through. It WILL come back to you, when you are ready. I now pray from my heart, and pour out my heart, when my heart needs such - not just for the sake of setting a good example etc.

  I'm looking forward to getting to know you. I'm in Canada too. Nova Scotia exactly. My email is open if you want to write.

  Welcome,

  Mimilly
• 

  patricia

  Lovely poem Bugs, thanks.

  What do you hope to find here, Reasurance? Most of the people who visit these boards have the same kind of problems and difficulties you have experienced. By coming here have they become wiser or redeemed from that big bad monster...Not Likely!

  This is a good question. Thinking about it I don't think I am looking for reassurance as much as feedback. I am quite confident in my intellectual personna but have lost my sense of spiritual worth. When I was a spiritually strong person (and yes to a point brainwashed by the borg) I sincerely thought I was saving lives by going to people's doors. There were some instances were I quietly rebelled (eg shunning those who were trying to come back into the congregation) but I didn't have a "crisis of conscience" about those things because I honestly didn't believe that Jehovah wanted me to behave in that manner being the God of love that He is.

  But the society seems to have totally changed their direction. I remember an illustration of the child being compared to a spring. The parents were like the hand that was compressing the spring and trying to control it. If they compressed it for too long they became tired and had to let go totally losing control of the spring (child). The spring bounces around with no direction until it finally comes to rest again. But if the parent gradually let the pressure off the spring (child) there would be no uncontrollable activity. The organization (our mother) has forcefully been compressing us as congregations to an extreme degree in recent years. The society has had to let go of some of the stronger individuals (springs) and in some cases these ones have bounced around uncontrollably never having this freedom of movement before. Others have gradually released themselves from the society's control with a view to taking back their lives and renouncing the hypocrisy of the borg. As each new squeeze is applied to the congregation (eg. even harsher dealings with df or those that have ds themselves) the borg is in danger of losing all control over all of its little springs. When that happens there is going to be an explosion of anger and bitterness. But I believe it will happen!!

  JW's started out as a very small group of Bible students. Now there over 6 million. We are a very small group here, but we have many more resources to reach people that the original brothers did. I think we have to be prepared for this influx of "sincere" people looking for answers. I feel the need for association and fellowship and I think those coming out of the borg in the future are going to need this too. It's great to talk to others on the board but do we have a responsibility to all those still in the borg, to not only try and rescue them, but to be prepared to offer direction and stability and some alternative for their faith? Do we do this with an organized but subtle attack or do we just do what we can as individuals? I don't know what the answers are but I think its something that needs to be considered.

  Edited by - Patricia on 5 July 2002 9:10:16
• 

  NewWay

  Welcome Patricia!

  Simply put, I live my life day by day content now to leave matters in God's hands. I have not lost my faith in Him because when I was an active JW I developed a personal relationship, like you. There are also times in my life when I believe our heavenly Father gave my family a 'helping hand'. When I got baptised, the intention was genuinely to dedicate my life to the service of God, not to an organisation. I've realised that service to God is not dependent on a piece of paper and cold-canvassing the local neighbourhood, but on displaying Christlike conduct towards those who come my way who have a need that I can fulfill whether spiritual or material. I've found that help can come from some quite unexpected quarters at times, so I try to keep an open mind and listen to what other people are saying. Don't forget that God knows his own and it is not for others to judge who does and who does not belong to him, although Jesus did say that 'by their fruits you will recognise them'. I no longer believe that he has any human 'representatives' on earth in the sense of a group of specially appointed people - like a new type of Governing Body - but rather I believe that individuals (not religous bodies) can work with us to support us spiritually. Those individuals are spread out like 'wheat among the weeds' and are not concentrated in any particular area of the world 'field'. Hopefully you will find at least some here to associate with who will prove to be like 'a hiding place from the wind'.
  
  Kind regards.
• 

  AjaxMan

  Welcome to the Board Patricia!!!

  You can post any questions, post replies. Because this is a forum, don't let arguments around here get to you as there are many kind of people and you have the freedom to express you thoughts even if it disagrees with others.

  Welcome and regards,

  Ajax
• 

  ozziepost

  G'day Patricia and let me add my welcome aboard! You're gonna have yourself a ball here, I'm sure!

  That was a great story you posted. Many thanks for sharing. The Borg has much to answer to God for, but please try and disociate Jehovah from Organisation. Jehovah God was NEVER the WTS, even though its officers act as if that were the case. You can be assured that God listens and answers prayer. Just try it. Don't be bound by the Borg's rules about prayers..just do it.

  You also have many thousands of board posters and lurkers to talk with and we look forward very much to hearing from you.

  Cheers, Ozzie
• 

  borgfree

  Hi Patricia and welcome,

  I lived a life similar to what you describe in your opening post. I was born into a family of JWs in 1938, I was baptised at age 11 and really believed the teachings of the Orginazation, most of my life. I can feel a book sized post in the making because I have experienced so much of what you talk about, but, I will not make this post that long. I will give my personal experience leaving the WT, in the hopes of making my post more brief.

  When I left the WT, I still thought, they were the only possible true organization, all the rest were of course, babylon the great. I knew something was very wrong in the organization and thought Jehovah would correct it in time, but I could not stand to be a part of it any longer. (too long here to give the reasons) I intended to just live my life the best I could and have nothing to do with "religion"

  Because of some wonderful people, ex-jws, I attended an ex-jw conference, then went to a bigger ex-jw convention in Pennsylvania where I heard some very good talks, actual bible based talks, that changed everything for me. I did something I would have NEVER thought I would do in my life. I went to the alter and gave my life to our Lord and Savior, Jesus.

  The Brother who encouraged me to give my life to our Lord was Eric Grieshaber, he told me at the time "your life will never be the same" he was absolutely right. At another ex-jw convention I was listening to a baptism talk given by Paul Blizard, I thought at that time I would not need to be re-baptised but, (for those of you who have heard Paul speak, you will understand) I changed my mind and was baptised, this time in the Name of The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit.

  I have been very happy since taking those steps. There have been many troubles and problems of course, but my hope and faith is in our Savior, and I am happy to leave everything in His hands. Most of my family are still in the Borg of course, but I was sooo blessed and happy a little over a year ago when my son left the WT and also gave his life to our Lord.

  I want to include what is known as the "sinners prayer" here. If you should feel the need, or if you are being drawn to the Lord, you may want to pray something like this. I have clipped it from the newspaper, it is only a guideline, you can use what words you choose to use.

  ____________________________________________________________________________

  God's Plan of Salvation

  1. Tell God that you realize you are a sinner, separated from Him because of your sin.

  2. Tell God that you realize there is nothing you can do to earn your own salvation.

  3. Tell God that you believe Jesus Christ died on the cross and shed His blood to pay the penalty for your sin.

  4. Ask God to cleanse you from sin, because you accept His offer of salvation through Jesus Christ, and tell Him that you want Him to take control of your life.

  When you pray this prayer of repentance and acceptance of Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, God will make you His child and the Holy Spirit will come to dwell within you.

  __________________________________________________________________

  That is something like the prayer I said when I gave my life to our Lord. I, like you, had a feeling I was close to Jehovah from the time I was a child. I have felt much closer to our God since taking the steps I mentioned above. I really fell the presence of our God in my life.

  I hope my experience my be some help to you Patricia. I wish you all the best.

  Borgfree (Roy)

  Edited by - borgfree on 5 July 2002 10:20:43
• 

  Lady Lee

  Welcome Patricia As you can see there is a lot of support and as you probably already realized many similar stories.

  Finding our own sense of God is a new experience. I think getting to know him after leaving the org. is sort of like getting to know someone you thought you knew but realized you didn't. The WTS presents a false image of who God is. I would think the best way to really get to know him and have a relationship with him would be to read your Bible (preferable different versions) and just talk to him.
• 

  Makena1

  Hello Patricia - welcome to the board - I really enjoyed your post. The atmosphere of the "org" did feel a lot different in the 50's. I was only 3 when I attend the Yankee Stadium convention in 1958, but I do have some strong memories.

  Finding a path after leaving the WTS is a real challenge. Like you, I always considered myself a spiritual person, believed strongly in the power of prayer etc. I have only prayed a handful of times over the past 2 years. Most of the time, I do not think about - however, at other times, it really bothers me.

  Reading Ray Franz's books helped me quite a bit to sort through all the conflicting feelings. I have not read it yet, but Greg Stafford's new book looks like it describes what we are going through - disconnecting Jehovah from the WTS.

  AlanF started a thread about it: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=25201&site=3

  This excerpt from the book in particular caught my attention:

  No one human alive today is given authority by the Scriptures to require that others accept all of the different teachings of an organization in order to be considered a true Christian. A person's belief in the importance of God's name should not be affected by whether they accept or reject the Watchtower's doctrine concerning 1914 CE. And no Christian should feel they have to abandon faith in God and in the Bible simply because there may be a question about the Watchtower's blood policy. Yet, many Witnesses who doubt the correctness of certain Watchtower interpretations have subsequently lost their faith in clear Bible teachings, including God's name and identity. Or if they have not lost their faith then they may have lost their zeal in proclaiming what the Bible does clearly teach, because their faith in God and in his Word is so closely aligned with a belief in God's use of the Watchtower Society to dispense "food at the proper time" (Matthew 24:45-47).

  When such doubts manifest themselves in one area of a person's faith, they can spread and infect all aspects of that faith. Since there is no outlet in the Watchtower organization to discuss doubts or express differences of opinion over what the Watchtower has deemed to be a sure biblical understanding, then any person who finds him- or herself in such a position is likely to either leave the organization in search of another or gradually disconnect from the organization's activities. This precarious position is partly due to the fact that Bible teachings which exist independently of the Watchtower are directly connected with acceptance of the "faithful and disreet slave" among Jehovah's Witnesses. So, if a Witness loses confidence in the "faithful slave" then his or her faith in basic Bible teachings may waver or falter altogether.

  I look forward to reading more of your posts and wish you all the best. You are a real survivor!

  Mak
• 

  moman

  Welcome Patricia, look foward to getting strong & you will have the satisfaction in helping others seperate from this DESTRUCTIVE CULT!