by Swan 40 Replies latest jw friends
Dear Capp,
Thank you. I wrote the story about the sheep as if it were to the young children I once knew. I know that most of them are grown up now and beyond fairy tales, but I am hoping to reach their hearts and the memories of me with this story. If they ever do want to leave the cult, then I want them to know I will be there for them. If they do not, I accept their right to their beliefs, however painful they may be.
Tammy
Dear Beck,
I think you are right. In their view funerals are just another chance to witness to unbelievers.
Death is a terrible thing...no matter what side of the fence we are on. Its just so sad to see the WT tell people how to mourn like its some kind of show...i hated that.
It is a show. It is all about bringing unbelievers into the KH where they wouldn't normally be caught dead, but come out of respect to the dead person and their family. It is also supposed to be a wake up call to the disfellowshipped and inactive family members to mend their ways or they will never see their loved one again. It is really a very diabolical way to manipulate people's emotions, rather than to give them a chance purge their emotions and to begin to heal.
Thank you.
Tammy
Dear Mulan,
Thank you very much.
We cooked meals, made gallons of coffee I think, and began planning her memorial service. For the adults it seemed good, but my brother's teenage daughters were left feeling that they shouldn't cry, and it wasn't good for them. We all went to the meeting at their KH that night (Ministry School and Service Meeting). We went on with our lives as though she hadn't died. I know now that we all just suppressed our grief. That isn't a good thing. I will never forget the blank faces on their girls. How they got through it, I don't know.
So, I am glad you are taking some time off of work. I am so sorry for your loss.
Her memorial was on Saturday night. How much do you want to bet (knowing that you just got back from Vegas) that my family showed up at the meeting on Sunday morning? My grandmother died in the hospital while we were all at the Sunday meeting. Life goes on in the WTBTS. What a crock!
Tammy
Dear Cassi,
Thank you for the lovely song. I appreciate the sentiment. We need to stop and feel the breeze often in our hectic lives. People come and go so suddenly here.
Tammy
Dear Nikita,
Thank you for the flowers. I love cheery daffodils. It makes me think that even though they are here for such a short time, they grace us with their beauty and our lives are enriched for it. That was very much like my niece. Now you have me crying again, but it is kind of a happy cry.
Tammy
(((((((((((Tammy)))))))))))))
Don't know what else to say other then I'm sorry
-Rick
(((((((Tammy))))))
Sabine and I are so very sorry to hear about the sudden death of your niece. It is especially tragic when death claims someone so young.
You are such a sweet person. We really enjoyed meeting you at the NW Apostofest. Please be assured of our love and wishes for comfort.
No one, a person or an organization has the right to tell us how to grieve. It's a personal thing, and differs so much. I played the piano or organ at numerous funerals starting when I was 10 years old and saw both ends of the spectrum. When our daughter died, I was an elder, wife was a pioneer. We shed many tears before the memorial service for her- but strangely very little at the service itself, and then many more in the months following.
There are many kind and helpful thoughts expressed on this thread. Please remember that you have friends that care very much for you.
Mak and Sabine
Oh, Tammy, this is so sad. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tammy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Hang in there.
((((((((((Tammy))))))))))
I have found (maybe you will too) that it is very helpful to write a letter to the person you can't communicate with (for what ever reason) and lay everything out (also very good for anger). Maybe you can go and find the prettiest card that says what you want in it, then sit down and talk (write) to Krystal. My Dearest Krystal................... tell her how much you loved her.........................how much you missed her................how sad it was that you couldn't see her grow up.................tell her everything you feel.
Give it a kiss, fold it up and put it in the card (or just an envelope) and put it away in a special place. You may want to do it a couple times. Give yourself a release to let her know how special she was to you.
I hope this is of some help to you. My thoughts are with you as you grieve.
KY Been
{{{{{Tammy}}}}} I am so sorry for your loss.
My deepest condolences.
Tina
