The other night my mom called me to just talk. My mother is a Jehovah's Witness still, so it is not unusual for that to be obvious in the conversation. Now I love my mom very much, and enjoy any time I can spend talking to her. The problem is, what Jehovah's Witnesses want to talk about, or what they can talk about can be very boring. I will be sitting there thinking, "what can I say next?" and have thoughts come to mind like ... "How about mentioning that book you just read?" Then I will remember that book is something they might consider demonized, or feel that it is a subject that they should not touch. So it just fades away. "How about mentioning your plans for the next few months?" Then I will remember that the next few months involved the Holidays and she is trying to act like we do not do observe those days. "How about mentioning that raise your wife got at work?" Well that might work, but didn't she say recently that all we ever think about is toys and money. Which as I know from my past, is a attempt at saying we are now materialistic. ... so as I sit there talking to her and having these thoughts go through my mind, I have to wonder, "what did we talk about before I left the religion that seems so time consuming and interesting to my mind?" Have you ever had one of those moments in your life where you just drank so much that even a fly buzzing around the room seemed like the most fascinating experience of the day? I know this happened to me once, and when I was more then "three sheets to the wind" I had a great idea to write something. I thought it was something I needed to get down on the word processor at that very moment. I barely remember even turning the computer on, or what I wrote. All I knew was that it must be the most important thing I wrote all year. I typed for hours, and hours. Until I was done. Then I crashed and went to bed. Well the next morning I woke up not feeling to good and spending a couple of moments at the porcelain god praying to it that I would never do that again. Later, I wandered into the computer room and found my masterpiece that I barley remember writing. I read it and I have to say, "explaining why red was a better color then yellow for three pages was not that interesting." Yet I know when I was drunk it was the most fascinating thing I ever thought of. This type of event is how I kind of see my Witness days. When I was in and having long conversation about whether or not pets would be resurrected into the new system, or whether or not Adam and Eve had belly buttons. I was thinking "stimulating conversation" and yet now I think "what a bunch of useless dribble." Basically, I look to those days the same way I look to moments of being completely drunk. You really need to be drunk to understand them. Now if you have ever had to be the sober one in the group to drive you friends home, than you will also relate to this. You are sitting there with your drunken friends and they are laughing about everything, and most of it you just don't get. It might be the fact that someone had a funny look on their face, or that such-in-such passed some gas. In all, you spend most of the night annoyed that all of your friends are so drunk that you can not relate to anything they are saying unless you were as well. Well this is how my conversations go with my mother at times. I love her like I said, but when I talk to her and have to censor out 90% of my life. The conversation can be so boring. How many times are we going to just sit and talk about the new recipe she came up with, or the talk on pruning her trees. Sometimes I want to scream, "can we talk about something deep?" Yet I know the answer would be ... "I don't understand what you mean?" and she would be saying the truth. Now I know I am not alone in this and I know others I talk to, that are Jehovah's Witnesses make me feel the same. Does this happen to you as well? My thought Dragon
Edited by - kenpodragon on 24 October 2002 14:14:29