Where do I go for support??? (page 4)

Ephanyminitas

One thing that you might consider, if it's feasible, is moving. I'm sure some will pooh-pooh the idea, but it would be much easier to start over if you really did start over. Just an idea (not necessarily a good or feasible one).

Shakita

Welcome to the forum scared:

My husband and I were where you guys are about 10 months ago. It seems longer than that when I think of it. We are still recovering from all the emotions from leaving an organization that you put your whole trust and future (and your children's future) in. Like Farkel said, it is a lifelong process. Take it day by day. Rejoice in your new freedom of thought, and in your release from the fear of never living up to what God requires of you. I am so happy that you are making this journey into the "real" world with your children. They will now get to enjoy all the "normal" things that all kids enjoy.

Take your time and I applaud you the courage it takes to take a stand for what is right, knowing the journey might be painful at times.

Take care.

Mrs. Shakita

Big Tex

Scared

You're getting some great advice so I won't add much. I only want to say that realize by standing up for yourself and leaving the organization you are actually showing more faith in God than if you stayed. You are now trusting him, and asking him to show you what the real truth is. Remember the Boreans in the Bible were spoken of favorably. God does not have a problem with people who ask questions. I know it's hard for you right now, but it does get easier and better. You'll find your outlook on life, the universe (and the restaurant at the end of it) improves dramatically. Please let us all know how you're feeling. Everyone here has been where you're at right now. Take care.

Chris

Far North

I too am caught in what seems a situation with no escape. (This is my first post.) I have been baptized for almost 40 years and no longer have a love for the 'truth' or a strong trust of the organization. I have pioneered, been an Elder and served at Bethel.

I would leave today, but my greatest fear is what it will do to my family. All my family and friends are in the organization. How can I leave without tearing apart my family. How can I tell my grown children most of what the were taught is incorrect?

My wife thinks I am just bitter over people and organizational procedures but my problem is not with the people but with the mind-control, the false doctrine, the false dates and the way I let myself be manipulated all these years.

It's like knowing you need an operation but wonder if the cure is going to be harder to live with than the ailment.

Far North

LoneWolf

scared --- I've been DFed for about 15 years now over something that I didn't do. That doesn't matter though, as I'd blown the whistle on a few elders and they had to get back at me somehow. (Got them removed too .) It was a great relief from the get go.

I can't add a whole lot to the others, but do wish to send my best wishes and encouragement.

Far North --- What part of the far north? If it's Alaska, we may know each other. My name is Tom Howell and my email is open. [email protected]

Don't put your name here though, even though I did. The Society monitors these sites and would probably catch you right away. I don't care myself, as I've been publically thumbing my nose at them for a long time now.

Take care.

LoneWolf

justhuman

Welcome to right place

We are here to help you, all of us have been trough the same process...it takes time, and it is painfull, but you "will know the truth and the truth will set you free"

It is better to know rather to be in WT lies and spend your rest of your life into the lie

You can do the follow:

1.Fade out, start to miss meetings and field service

2.Don't tell your doubts to any one they will not understand(their minds are closed and controled by the WT

3.Try to make new friends(they are many in this forum that they are willing to help you) so that you will start to replace the WT friends(they cannot love you unconditionally, friendship is offered with the condition as long as you are a member of the WT club)

4. Read the Bible(not the NWT, that's not a translation) ask for the Holy Spirit for guidance, and pray to JESUS.

5.If you have relatives and friends and you don't like to loose them completely just FADE OUT it is the best thing to do. Propably they will say that you have material spirit and that's it. They will keep talking you and still talk to them.

6. Or if you don't mind, write a letter of disassociaton and send the Watchtower to HELL, and no one will talk to you and consider you as spiritual deads

Shakita

Welcome Far North:

You said,

I would leave today, but my greatest fear is what it will do to my family. All my family and friends are in the organization. How can I leave without tearing apart my family. How can I tell my grown children most of what the were taught is incorrect?

You will not be able to leave the organization without being scarred in some way. We all are. That is the legacy of all JW's who leave the org. Unless your family can see the truth about the WTBS like you have, you will have turmoil in your family. But, it will not be because of you. The blame is totally put on that very wealthy publishing company that controls every facet of each and every JW's life.

Our family has come to this new realization in the past year. Our grown son and his wife were first to learn the real truth about the WT. They helped us in little ways to see that to stay with this org. as JW's is to live a lie. Because my husband and I were having problems in our congregation, we were ready to hear what my son had to say. We will forever be grateful for him for the way he gradually approached the subject. It must be done delicately, like you are introducing a new food to a baby. If you try to shove it in all at once, it will just be spit up back at you. Baby steps with your family is always best. We still have a daughter and her husband still in. They are happy being JW's right now. Little by little, I hope to drop some hints about the things I have learned in the past 10 months. But, I know it will not happen overnight. She has told me she will never shun me. I believe her. I expect that to work in my favor in taking those baby steps for her freedom also.

Do your research and use the Watchtower's quotes to provide proof their dishonesty. Use certain situations within your congregation to show that this is not God's only channel to salvation. We were very upset by the way many good people were treated and how they were punished by the elders. Put a human spin on things when speaking with your family members, not just doctrinal things.

I am sure that many others here will have better advice then I have given you. Just ask, and you will receive. I wish you the very best, I know this is an upsetting and emotional time for you. Take care.

Mrs. Shakita

sunshineToo

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I've been DA'd for about 5 months now. Only my mom is a jw, and the rest of the family is pretty supportive to me, which I think I am quite lucky. I can only imagine what you are going through. But I'm so glad and applaud you for your and your husband's courage. I practically grew up like a jw. My mom was disfellowshipped, but she always thought the Watchtower had the truth. I joined the Watchtower later in early 20s and encouraged mom to reinstated. She did. And you know what that's going to be like with a disassociated daughter.

I married a wonderful man. Fortunately he's not a jw. We are celebrating our, more likely my, first Christmas in 12 years. We don't have children yet, but we would like to start our family tradition, and I've been researching for a while - mostly Food Network and Home and Garden TV. I still need some help on how to decorate the tree.

Spiritually speaking I'm lost. What I had been believing for all my life proved to be false. I don't know what to do yet. I'm still praying. I would like to keep God in my life and in my family.

Email me if you wish. I'm sure we can talk about many things. Where do you live? I live in the San Francisco Bay Area, CA, U.S.A.

sunshineToo

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You have to make the decision. For me even though I knew that my relationship with my mom and "the friends" would be in danger, I couldn't live a lie any longer. I didn't want to be guilty by association. But some people still go with the flow. Their heart may not be in the organization, but they act or stay for the sake of family.

I wasn't all alone, though. I had my husband and a very supportive friend. I was very lucky for that. For me finding and talking to people who would listen and understand was a tremendeous help. This forum is great. I hope to see you around.

mouthy

First let me take JT in my arms & give him a big hug You made me feel "young" again .lol

second Country Girl to answer you I am Grace Gough on the list http://www.jwinfoline.com/Page/audio.htm have a laugh...

Far North so glad you joined us. You sure have a problem knowing what to do!!! I feel if you tell any in your family your doubts you may lose them-It will be like all you love dying....But I would NOT continue going to the Kingdum Hell even for their sakes.... I would keep showing them the peaceful love you will experience with out the Borg telling you what you must feel,wear, do, etc:etc: I do hope you will continue to pray about them--- God works in mysterious ways His wonders to perform.I would like to add I dont always agree with HIS ways -I would wipe the lot out if I was God.I also want to tell you I love the JWs VERY MUCH -I just hate the influence of the Devil on it. God be with you friend

Where do I go for support???

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