by Methof15 25 Replies latest jw experiences
Meth
Perhaps you can take comfort in this line from The Master's Notebook which is contained in Richard Bach's book, Illusions.
"The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life.
Rarely do members of one family grow up under the same roof."
Hi Meth:
It only hurts when I'm breathing....
My heart only breaks when it's beating....
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming....
So, I hold my breath......to forget.......
These are lyrics from "It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing" by Faith Hill. I was listening to it today, and it reminded me of your post. I am so sorry you are hurting. The WTBS has broken up many families, many hearts, many dreams. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone.
Take care.
Mrs. Shakita
Meth,
I'm so sorry to hear about your predicament. It must feel really bad for you.
I wish I had some words of wisdom to pass on to you. But I'm just "riding the storm" myself.
At least you will find some encouragment and similar types here.
Dear Meth,
As you can see you have friends here. Many have lived through similar and are so familiar with the pain. Many hearts go out to you and welcome you, including mine.
We want to fix the hurt in others and mend broken ways, especially in our families, but too often we just can't. People do as they do. Stay aware of your own heart, be true to you Meth. Try not to let the shunning and actions of other family members harden you or cause you to be bitter. Be aware of and acknowledge your inner pain and sorrow, do not run from it. Be at peace with the fact that you are open, caring and loving. Allow your sad and painful circumstances to compel you to be more open, rather than less. This may seem contrary to what many do, but in time you will see yourself bloom. You will be like spring rain on the parched souls around you.
As has already been mentioned, as time goes on, you will come to find a closer family, one that rings true. People who resonate and are in harmony with the deeper sense of freedom, joy and compassion that is so evident within you.
The situation may not look so good, but you Meth are a fortunate and lucky person. I wish I was as wise as you at your young age.
JamesT
methof15,
Welcome to the board! I can relate to your situation for myself. I've been disassociated since July and have been in very difficult situation with my mom who is a devout jw. She calls me and sometimes stops by my house. My youngest brother is staying with me so that makes easier. She is the only jw in our family. She doesn't have meals with me anymore. And she seems to be depressed whenever I see her. I have been shunned by my friends and students - I teach piano.
When one of jw kids quit without notice ( they were supposed to give me 30-day notice), I sent a letter to her parents that they need to pay me for the month. Her mom called me "inhumane". Can you believe it? I stood up for what was right- for the children and trufulness. Then, here I was called "inhumane".
I can understand how hard it has been for you and your family members. Try to support eachother. Never be an avenger but play a victim instead. Let the world see that it is you who are suffering and vitimized, not the jws. And try to move on with your life. You are 17? You should be going college pretty soon. Go to a good one or transfer to a good one after a few years of settling down and preparation. Get a good career and keep close to your other family members and friends.
And do not shun your mom and brother. Also stay away from drugs, immoral sex, smoking and alchohol abuse. Then someday you'll meet someone who would give you all the support in the world and love. Then you can start your family and new family tradition. And that'll be a good start away from the WTS/JW. It is not going to be easy. But remember that you are not alone and there are people out there who care about you.
sunshineToo
Welcome Meth
I wish I had the glue for you. You are definately at an advantage (17 yrs young) to have realized how much this cult has torn your family apart. You have a long life ahead of you. Anything is possible and only time will tell if you can "save" your family. I know how hard it is to realize that the reason why your family is torn apart has much to do with the borg. My mother is the only one still in the "troof". My dad was df'd for alcoholism, and he is beating his head against the wall trying to get back in. I also have a younger brother and sister who are currently not going to any meetings. Sis is married has no intentions of going back. Lil Bro is 21, I doubt that he is going to return. My advise to you, heal yourself first. Also educate yourself. I am sure you are thinking about college. The one thing that I think baffles family is seeing you having a good life and being happy not being a JW. I know, my mom gets really surprised (upset) when I tell that I'm having a great time, and I'm happy with my life. So take baby steps. Start by building up a relationship with one of the family members available. Who know this may cause a domino effect on the rest of the family.
Good luck on your journey.
Hi Meth,
Bummer about your family! I know where you're coming from.
Please email me: [email protected] . I may have some news of interest for you.
AlanF
Welcome to the board, Meth, and may the people here bring you comfort. I agree with some of the other statements, and I hope someday it wil not hurt so much to understand that "family" is not always about blood. Your family are the people who love you, support you, and believe in you. Don't stop showing love to your "family" members that are still brainwashed, but understand that it is their choice not to show love to you. Trust me, though, when I tell you you can and will find love outside, and it will bring you joy. Much love.
Welcome Meth,
Sorry for the situation you are in. Many here including myself know what you are going thru. One thing to be grateful for though is that your not 40 and just figuring out what you already know about the WTS. Alot of people including myself raised our children in it and not only do our parents shun us but our kids too.
So take advantage of being young and go forward with your life and raise a wonderful normal family away from the WTS. Also keep the faith, you never know when Jesus will change the hearts of your loved ones.
Good Luck on your journey!
Robotnomore
Welcome to this forum Meth.
It seems that almost everyone at some time in their lives, reaches a point where they need to focus on, their own well being and on what is best for them.
At 17 yrs of age this is a good time to think of and plan for, your future. As others here have stated, and education or training in some specific field is needed to make ends meet in todays society. You didn't make mention of it, but I assume that your dad is there for you, in this situation. If so, you two can work together in your's and his best interests.
As for the healing of a disrupted family, only time and your demonstrating a happy and sucessful life will work in this direction. Also if they see in you an accepting and loving attitude towards them as persons, This leaves the door open for healing.
In my case it was the passing of time that in many ways brought most of us back together.
At your age this is a sad situation. But at your age you can do the necessary planing and work to achieve what you need. When you feel down or about to give up, turn to those adults that you can trust, have your best interest on all things.
Posting your feelings and fears here on this forum will be a good way to get things out and you will receive a lot of suggestions. Most of them will be good. Let us know from time to time how you are doing.
Outoftheorg
