How do you glue together a broken home

by Methof15 25 Replies latest jw experiences

  • jurs
    jurs

    Hi Meth,

    I just wanted to welcome you to the board. How awful to be DF'd at 15 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its funny how when I was a witness I never looked at that as child abuse. I do now!

    jurs

  • ESTEE
    ESTEE

    (((((Meth)))))

    It is not your job to glue your broken family together. I, too, know the pain of a family that the jws have torn apart. I have two children that won't speak to me since I left the jws. I follow them on the internet, since they move around a lot. It boils down to choices. I love them very much, and still won't let myself be blackmailed by their "conditional" love, as in "we will love you only if you are a jw". Some good advice I was told was to carry on with my own life. Give myself the best quality of life in my power to have. I choose happiness for myself, and fulfillment. I do things that I enjoy doing, such as ballroom dancing. I include other people's children in my life, treating them as I would treat my own, with tenderness and love. That feels very rewarding to me.

    The more your mom says "I know you will come back" the more you will resist, I feel sure. That is just human nature. If she would simply "let go", it would feel easier for you. If she won't let go, then you may choose to put physical distance between the two of you. Make a happy life for yourself and carry on to the best of your abilities. Your pain will heal. Your mom is hurting. It is her job to deal with her pain. It is your job to live your life.

    Welcome to the board and keep us posted!

    ESTEE

  • dhset44
    dhset44

    Perhaps the parents of younger witnesses should ask why Jesus wasn't baptized until he was thirty years old. More later.

  • Beans
    Beans

    I left when I was 16 and never looked back, luckily my family still talks to me as I was never baptized!

    Here's my story! http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=41100&site=3

    http://Quotes.JehovahsWitnesses.com

    Good Luck man!

    Beans

    Canadian District Overbeer

  • starfish422
    starfish422

    Beans, just read your story. I missed it when you first posted it, I guess. Had to LOL when you were talking about Quotes' brothers, I used to call them The Apostles, there were so many of them. :)

    And (maybe I need another cup of coffee) the last paragraph about hooking up with Quotes again after all that time made me cry! :) I have been hoping for a similar experience with any of my close friends from my Borg years (one in particular, perhaps you know him?). I keep searching for friends; on the exJW databases, etc. I left almost ten years ago; I hope my time will come soon! :)

  • gumby
    gumby

    Hey Meth,

    First of all............you need to change this nickname you have already aquired here......what a nickname eh?

    What do you do when your family doesn't feel like family anymore?

    Sad to say my friend, but the answer is........DEAL WITH IT. You can't change it.....but......you can keep it from getting worse....and perhaps"better". How? Do not push those who are Witnesses away from you by making any trouble.Keep religion out of your conversations for now and be loving and kind.

    My family will still at least talk on the phone and allow me to visit them I am fortunate however. If I was a pain in the ass and made trouble when I saw them....it would be over. I try and be happy, loving, and kind to them , and it really surprises them! It works for me and this is the way we should be anyways to them . They are lost.....not us.( at least in this catagory )

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