i understand scooby's comments. I actually am a still active witness and will continue to be because I have so many friends and relatives I do not want to leave. My husband has turned me on to this sight and I have been enlightened in many ways. But I do not have the hate and contempt many have because I have not experienced what many have. i have been raised not to feel the guilt . i was always taught the blood of Christ covers our sins, elders are not policemen in our lives , and we do the best we can, and to NEVER be judgemental. Maybe I'm a rare jw but I don't let others control my life. I enjoy having religion in my life and haven't found another that interests me as the JW's do. I do feel for the hardships many have had and believe they did go through these things. I wish I could have been around to show them love. My love goes out to you. I sincerely mean this. Even though there may be some who will jump on me. that's OK =^..^=