JW Boyfriend is being brainwashed !

Camay

My boyfriend and I live together and have been for about 3 years.
He wants me to convert, after research I will not. (I was raised bapstist) He hasnt went to the Hall in two weeks, last nite he went because a "Elder" called him, why did they have him in a meeting till
11 at nite, he came home and told me he CONFESSED and he is in trouble. and excused me of HINDERING his faith..WHAT IS GOING ON !!
I have always been supportive & respectful in regards to his choices.
I think they told him I was evil or something..Is this common practice
? What happens when a Elder wants to talk ?!

ianao

*** NOTE: The following is only an idiot's opinion!!!! ***

Your boyfriend is guilty of independent thinking.

You are being blamed for the doubts he is starting to realize in his own mind by the elders. Soon you will be public enemy #1 in his own mind, if he takes these superstitions seriously. (You can't compete with one's perceived creator.)

I wish you the best of luck, as your lives together are already being compromized, IMO. Those witnesses are playing on guilt and his natural fear of death just as a catholic or a protestant plays on guilt and fear of eternal burning.

I'm sure others will be willing to offer some helpful advice for you if you are really "hung up" on your "lover". If I were in YOUR shoes though, I would *LEAVE* as it will save you and him BOTH the trouble.

Just my .025 cents/pents worth.

fodeja

I think they told him I was evil or something..Is this common practice

You needn't be "evil"! You're an unbeliever, which means you're "bad association"(TM) by definition. They don't even need to know you at all, the way you live or whatever you happen to believe in. You, as a person, do not matter at all. You're bad association simply because you're not on the JW member list. And of course, premarital sex is one of the all-time favourites of JW "judicial" committees.

Your boyfriend has broken the rules, and now he's torn between loyalty to his group and his relationship to you. Since you've done some research, you should understand by now that he's in acute danger of being excommunicated. Which, of course, is a very serious thing in JW circles - once you're out, you're considered a pretty much worthless person, headed for destruction.

I know all too well how bizarre this may seem in our oh-so-enlightened 21st century society, but that's the way it is.

f.

stephenw20

Camay,
welcome!

sorry it has to be on such a tough subject..........
but then most who have association with the JWS....... if they are honest with themsleves...find SOMETHING that doesnt sit right.......

it sounds like your BF has been called on the carpet about your relationship. ITS REALLY HIS DECISION..to LISTEN to them or NOTt.......he can chose to HAND Over his energies...thinking ability and choices to them if he wishes......but it wont EVER end if he caves at this point......
not until he SEES for HIMSELF what the ORG is all about.....

I Imagine it may a bit tense right now..but if he could take some time to research the org on his own his OWN opinion may change about the JWS..

there are plenty of places to look...and if you need pointers just ask we will be happy to give up a list......

the elders...... are no more qualified to decide your life ...his life or anyone elses....... they just have ASSUMED the position...

we all know the assume story.......

slipnslidemaster

Oh honey! I feel very bad for you. You are in for a bumpy ride. I hope that he has the strength to see them for manipulative, brainwashing, controling cult that they are, but the odds are against it.

Dating one of Jehovah's Witnesses is never easy and I hate to say it, but you should consider ending the relationship. If you are strong enough to hang in there, I hope it works out for the best, but I have little hope and you are just going to go through a very prolonged heart breaking experience.

I am an ex-JW and it still hinders my relationships with people.

. o O (slipnslidemaster)

SixofNine

Camay, don't worry about it, you've been excused.

Seriously, I think it is time for boyfriend, emphasis on boy, to figure out what he believes, and start living by it.

You might start there, ask him just exactly what it is he believes, and then be willing yourself to get out of the way of those beliefs. He is obviously either confused as to what he believes, or not up to the task of living up to his beliefs (and his beliefs are a hard taskmaster).

ps. research is a great thing, isn't it?

humble

You two are fornicators. That is not anti-jw, but anti-biblical. Of course, the situation can be fixed by following God's commandments and just doing what is right. If you love each other, get married. Marriage is wonderful.

Camay

I understand that we are both fornicators, however I cant make him
marry me and he will not unless I convert, but I cant convert to something I dont feel comfortable with.

I care about him and I understand that he must leave. Its just
sad that he feels like he must confess, I tried to get him to
look at the information I have found but he refuses.

Its really sad to see him cry & vomit when I started to share this
information about the JW founders and the Watchtower. He needs to be
strong in whatever faith he chooses. I am faced with something
I already knew. He is weak, insecure and easly influnenced.
and that is not someone that would make a good husband anyway, but
it still hurts me to see him feel so bad, If a religion brings you
so much pain why would you even want to be in it. but he was raised
that way.

I was just hoping that someone out there has went thru this and could
offer me some sound advice.

HUMBLE:
As far sin we all are sinners in some sort of way, but I am not a bible thumper.so please save yourself rightesous comments for someone
who wants to hear it.

larc

Camay,

I don't think people were condemning you and your boyfriend for living together. They were trying to show you how the JWs think. Your boyfriend will likely be disfellowshipped for what his religion, not us, consider to be serious wrong doing.

larc

Camay,

In my last post, I neglected to notice who made the comment to you - Humble. He is a JW, so he is one of the few here who is taking their official position.

JW Boyfriend is being brainwashed !

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