Last night I asked about getting reinstated...

by Gadget 45 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  BluesBrother

  What does your girlfriend want to do?

  It seems that she is the one most likely to be affected by your decision . If she is really committed to the relationship then it is up to her to be brave and face the music.

  Carry on the relationship. When ready, get married. Work towards joint reinstatement if you must, then fade away so you can speak to your Inlaws.

  Reminds me of a girl who was seeking re instatement at my last congo. She had been dissed, married the man , got her reinstatement . We never saw her at meetings after that.
• 

  PurpleV

  I wouldn't lie about it, personally. To me, that means they're controlling you too, in that you are forced to lie* to avoid the repercussions that they determine upon you

  This is absolutely true, however, JWs feel no compunction about lying theocratic warfare when necessary. If it will spare the fiance from the pain of DFing and losing her family, I think a little lying untheocratic warfare is justified.
• 

  free will

  "If you do continue to see your girlfriend, do not go to where she lives, because she could have elders watching her place."
  
  amazing- that "men of god' act this way.---when i read that (knowing it could very well happen) i couldn't help feeling like i was watching a crime drama.
• 

  l3gi0n

  I can feel your pain, My wife is D/Fed and when she applied for reinstatement, after 6 months ( IT TOOK 6 MORE MONTHS TO GET AN ANSWER!!) She was turned down, for talking to my parents. My parents were also counseled. Since then, she has given up, she cries almost every day, some times for hours on end, she has stopped going to meetings (only proving to the bastards she is demonized) because she just feels worthless, she is constantly talking of suicide, and she has lost all motivation in life.

  I want to kick there ass's
• 

  bebu

  ((((((((((legion and wife))))))))))

  PLEASE get some counseling for your wife! My JW neighbor was suicidal, and I think that talking with someone else (even me, a non-JW) and finding that people CAN care about her unconditionally kept her from going closer/over the edge. .

  Her talking of suicide is a real plea for help. If she doesn't work and is alone all day, she can work herself down deeper. If she works all day and it sits in the back of her mind, unaddressed, she is still at great risk when it all comes out.

  Call around to counselors and see if any of them have had experience with JWs; let them know she is sensitive about seeing a non-JW. Then tell her that, as her husband, you are directing her to see this specially selected person. Let her know that YOU want her to be around!!! I hope you've done something like this already; congrats if so. Doing nothing means nothing will change for her.

  My biggest hugs to your dear wife! I'm pulling for you.

  (I do not mean to hijack a thread.)

  bebu
• 

  avengers

  Here's my advice:

  If you don't then watch out:
• 

  freedom96

  I do believe that true love can overcome just about anything. I liked what a previous poster said, and that was just going ahead and getting married now. At least then you have each other. If you still want to get reinstated, they will eventually, even with you both married.

  The problem is though, it sounds like these elders are on a power trip, and they are going to tear you and your fiance down no matter what. Even if you get reinstated, they will still cause problems with you and your fiance.
• 

  JT

  this thread truly illlustrates why a person needs to get as far away from the wt org as possible

  here we have a guy who has a natural desire to be with a woman -yet due to being involved with the wt he has 3 CHEESE AND CRACKER MEN who control his life

  Just consider and not to dog this poster persay, --for his fate is the pretty much the same for any jw--

  here we got one guy who works at HOME DEPOT, another BLOCK BUSTERS and the third -- Local ConEdison power company

  avg level of education 11th grade and to think this is the type of life that WE USED TO SUMMIT OURSELVES TO

  my dear man -MY ADVICE IS consider very seriously taking control of your life and not leaving it in the hands and whims of THE CHEESE AND CRACKER MEN
• 

  Gadget

  www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/53757/1.ashx
• 

  Gadget

  For the last few weeks I've been talking to my fiance about this situation, and how it makes her feel, and also what she feels about the witnesses in general. Whilst she is so p***** off about what has happened, she thinks that this is a human failing, and not something to do with Jehovah. She doesn't want to follow every single rule in the past, and says she is weak, but wants being a witness to have a big part in her life in the future. This is after long discussions on hypocrisy among witnesses, constantly changing doctrines, ect. We split up tonight.