Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story) (page 9)

m0nk3y

northern girl I feel sad for you. You said -

The wagons have circled. I give up but only because everyone of you are so close minded. Ravyn, I read your post ... youv'e had enough life time experiences for a few people.
Who would all of you have to blame for all your problems if it wasn't for the big bad WTBS. Don't you think it's time to shut the door on the past and move on. Really, there is more to life.

The reason I feel sad for you is that you cannot accept that my story isn't about my hatred of the WTBS. To be honest I don't know how you got that impression from my story. It comes down simply to me being brought up to believe with all of my heart that my god hated who I was, being taught that Jehovahs Witnesses are the most loving people and sadly most of them are not living by the reputation that they constantly profess. As far as I'm concerned when I express my anger about it I don't see the WTBS .. I see the people that failed me despite promising they wouldn't. I see the faces of those peoples that I grew up with turning their back on me in my greatest time of need.

I'm sorry you are the type of person that despite my pain and anguish that I have gone through to write this story and share it with others feels the need to tell me that I need a reality check when clearly it's you that doesnt understand reality. I am very sorry. Stop labeling people with ideas and comformistic impressions .. get to know each persons story and feelings .. at the heart of that lies understanding for you fellow man and within that lies your salvation.

Josh

ESTEE

after your last comments ... I rest my case.

She rests her case?....as in judgment?

When I was a dub I tried to comfort a gay man dying from AIDS. I realized that there was no comfort from the Bible to be found. It was another foot hold....another turning point in my dub-ish life. The dub life simply does not work for a lot of us. That is a reality of life. I'm glad I had that experience...it supplied another crack of light into the dark dub world I lived in. Dubs don't have answers to all the problems of human living, and resist admitting it. I believe that is when they turn to blame and judgment....blame and judgment turns the tables away from the failure of their religion. Like walking with a broken crutch. Their limp becomes more pronounced. They continue to live in denial a little longer. Put their ostrich-head in the sand a little longer. Maybe it is just a matter of time before they open their eyes after that point in time....like with me. By degrees...over a period of years....

Anyway, since ng is lurking here, she is having independent thoughts and actions...independent of the borg. She is well on her way to becoming "one of us"....at this point she is still resisting...it is only a matter of time...and we will be reading her story! Like so many other past lurkers here!!! And we will welcome her for having the courage to take her head outta the sand and see the reality!!!

Josh!!! I feel very proud of you for having the courage to share your story here. You are safe and supported here!! You are loved!!!

ESTEE

Jade

(((((((((((((Monk3y)))))))

Thanks so much for sharing your story. As a mom you have reminded me that the words/actions of a parent, especially at certain times can critically wound or heal our children's pain. We really have to be "in tune" with our kids, with all they go through growing up. Being raised a JW I was reared with nothing but guilt and affection was withheld for not behaving like a "good witness." After I read your story I went and hugged my teenage son and reminded him how much I love him. I got the biggest smooch back. Life is good today.....thanks.

Jade

m0nk3y

Awwww heheh good for you Jade. People like you make me proud. *hugz*

Josh

be wise

Thankyou so much for your story monkey. I t must have taken so much out of you writing that - but you did it and have helped so many people. I read your story yesterday and I couldn't get it out of my head. I'm very open minded but not always with true understanding. It really has changed me as a person deeply and opened my eyes in a big way. I'm really sorry for how you were treated but I feel things will just get better and better for you from here.

all the best

be wise.

Hamas

he he

See you have become a 'chick with a dick' monkey !

Country_Woman

((((m0nk3y))))

You have dealt with extreme pain and troubles.
I can only say that you are “a grown-up” person yet.

To read your story learned me too: Before I was baptized I had gay acquaintances - during my time as a JW, I had a gay friend and found it difficult to act like I always did (knowing that the WTBTS won’t agree) - today he is still a friend (I am glad I never condemned this friendship - I only told him he was a loss for all woman) What I now understand is that he (he has a JW-brother) must have underwent a lot of pain and criticism.

I think no parent will enjoy the fact that a son of daughter is gay or lesbian - most of the time with that kind of relation, there is no “further” there will be no grandchildren no further “joy”.

But all parents, who really love their children, will accept the loves and partners of their children when the out came of that love is that their children are “happy”.
(For JW-parents it is extra difficult because the WTBTS don’t approve)

m0nk3y, thanks for sharing - I wish you and your partner much happiness.

Branda

Garnet

((((Josh))))

You are a very brave man, it takes so much to talk about your problems, esp. with other people. I admire your strength and your willingness to share such a dramatic personal experience with all of us out here on the board.

We all go through trying times in our lives, your experience was not an easy one, but you made it through...as one poster said "what doesnt kill you , makes you stronger". I am a firm beliver in that statement, throughout my own life, I have battled bouts of chronic depression and substance abuse, I also made it and I am a stronger person now than I was before. Keep your head up and stay strong.

Much Love

Garnet

Brummie

Josh I hope you dont think my comments to NG are underestimating this thread? I'm gonna quit communicating on it now as its suddenly dawned on me that this is not the thread to joke around on, I apologise.. You are a brave guy and I'm very pleased for you to have finally gotten to where you are now, just sorry that you had to go through that hell for so long.

Brummie

shera

Wow,that was very moving.I had tears in my eyes....

I admire you very much Josh....(((((((JOSH))))))

Glad your happy and you deserve it!

Heather

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

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