Would you be willing to admit it if you've been a hypocrite?

by onacruse 52 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    I suppose because I hate hypocrisy so much, I've worked hard in my life not to be one. I think I've largely succeeded. As a witness, I was sincere and did not preach what I did not believe, I did not answer with words I did not agree with. Not being someone who was "taking the lead" may have made this more easy for me.

    When I grew a beard, I disagreed with the society's position on men wearing beards. I let pretty much everyone, the CO's included, know that. I asked them to reason and change for the better. They wouldn't, and the cognitive dissonance of it all almost killed me, but I don't think there was any hypocrisy in my staying for 6 years or so with a beard.

    I freely went to R rated movies my entire adult life. I didn't tell the elders I did, but I didn't particularly hide it either. When it came up, I argued (accurately too) that the unwritten rule JW's follow was not biblical, and for that matter, didn't harmonize with the WT's writings. I think now, more and more witnesses play it pretty much the way I did, although the unwritten rule is certainly still in place. But really, they're only hypocrits if they go about telling people it is wrong to see R rated movies, and then do so themselves. A fairly common hypocrisy among JW elders with dvd machines, I'd guess.

    When I finally read a reasoned rebuttal of the blood issue, I spent about 3 days reading everything I could get my hands on about our blood doctrine, and decided that I would no longer consider myself a Jehovahs Witness. I never went to another meeting.

    In the post above by Hillary, don't be too quick to dismiss the cat story. (btw Hillary, my cat Maggie is a boy as well, lol) It's just that sort of everyday ho-hum hypocrisy by parents (as opposed to cat owners), that churns out future generations of future hypocrits of America (FHA) with ill will towards adults. I'm sure most reading this thread so far have naturally thought about hypocrisy in terms of our fellow adults.... but imo, a real sickness on this earth is parental hypocrisy. Kids of course see it... but it's when they inevitably have to accept it that it causes such mayhem with lives. Any 18 year old will tell you how disgusting hypocrisy is, but many have had 18 years to accept it as normal because so many parents believe they have some automatic moral authority over their offspring. They don't. So many parents say they don't need to be "friends" with their kids, just "parents". Perhaps it's because they know that years of hypocrisy have left the door closed to friendship? Think about it, it's really hard to feel friendship towards anyone you consider a hypocrit.

  • teejay
    teejay

    So, Six...

    ... would you be willing to admit it if you've been a hypocrite?

  • talesin
    talesin

    It seems to me that people who are struggling to free themselves from the oppression and brainwashing of a cult are NOT hypocrites. If your escape was difficult and/or agonizingly slow, why beat yourself up?

    but if you insist ...

    then please allow me to say a resounding thank you to all who felt they were hypocrites! Hypocrasy is the reason I fled the JWO at 18, and all the crap that went with it. The hypocrites drove me out. Yippee!

    That being said, I echo the opinions of Brummie, KGB and others. We're all capable of it. I am human and embrace the frailties that are part of me. Although I was never hypocritical abt the JWO, I have been about other issues in life. Just don't be nasty - call me on my behaviour and don't label me 'hypocrite'. Label me 'strong survivor'.

    Peace & love

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine
    oh, to live with integrity, when your every thought, behavior, decision, and action align with your conscious beliefs; very difficult to achieve in our imperfect condition, but something for which to eternally strive.

    So true, nowisee, but also so much easier when one is not torturing one's conciousness with bible contradictions or JW moralisms borrowed from bible contradictions.

  • Xandria
    Xandria

    So us this going to be like an AA meeting ? Hello, my name is Xandria.. I am and ex-jw and ex- hypocrite thank you. (Xandria sits down meekly and crosses her legs like a good girl.o0(now that is an hypocrisy thought X as she straightened her apostate horns.)

    X

  • GinnyTosken
    GinnyTosken

    Here is a recycled post on a closely related topic.

    Ginny

    How Do You Handle Hypocrisy? appears in the November 15, 2001 Watchtower. The article intrigues me because instead of a clear-cut condemnation of hypocrisy, the article wavers back and forth.

    First, the writer defines hypocrisy:

    Judas was a hypocrite--a person who pretends to be what he is not, someone who hides his bad motives behind a mask of sincerity. The Greek word rendered "hypocrite" means "one who answers" and also denotes a stage actor. In time, the word came to refer to anyone who was simply putting on an act in order to deceive others.

    The scribes and Pharisees are cited as examples of hypocrisy:

    Consider the religious climate when Jesus was on earth. The scribes and Pharisees pretended to be loyal teachers of God's Law, but in reality they filled people's minds with human teachings that drew attention away from God. The scribes and Pharisees scrupulously insisted on the letter of the law, but they ignored fundamental principles that reflected love and compassion. In public they pretended to be devoted to God, but in private they were full of badness. Their deeds never measured up to their words. Their objective in doing things was "to be viewed by men."

    Insisting on the letter of the law but ignoring the principles of love and compassion? Why is that so familiar?

    An example is given of a family who had not learned to identify hypocrites. This family hired a lawyer who was also a preacher in a local church. When the family received a $3.4 million settlement, the preacher pocketed most of it. The article says:

    Regarding this lawyer, a law journal stated: "If he preached the kind of conduct he practised . . . , his message would have to be this: let us prey." How can we protect ourselves from people like that?

    "Keep your eyes open," was the advice Jesus gave to those in his day who were confronted with religious hypocrisy. (Matthew 16:6; Luke 12:1) Yes, we must be cautious. People may profess the most noble aims and ooze sincerity, but we need to exercise reasonable caution and not immediately accept everyone at face value. Would we not carefully check our bank notes if we knew that counterfeit currency was in circulation?

    Hypocrites have appeared even within the true Christian congregation. . . .

    Oh, dear! What should we do if we encounter hypocrites within the true Christian congregation? Expose their hypocrisy as Jesus did with the scribes and Pharisees?

    "Stop Judging"

    How easy it is for imperfect humans to point out other people's failings while ignoring their own! . . .

    When others at times do things that seem hypocritical, we must be careful not to label them hastily as hypocrites. The apostle Peter, for example, "went withdrawing and separating himself" from Gentile fellow believers in Antioch so as to please visitors of Jewish background from Jerusalem. Barnabas 'was also led along with Peter and others in this pretense.' . . . But this slip on the part of Barnabas and Peter surely did not put them in the same category as the scribes and Pharisees or Judas Iscariot.

    Oh, I see! Hypocrisy is a matter of degree and frequency! I wonder if this defense can be used in committee meetings?

    The article assures us that all hypocrisy will eventually be exposed:

    "There is nothing covered over that will not become uncovered," said Jesus Christ, "and secret that will not become known." (Matthew 10:26; Luke 12:2)

    So, if a religious organization bears hypocritical fruit, should we leave it? Does not a little leaven ferment the whole lump?

    Meanwhile, why should we allow the hypocrisy of others to affect us to the point that we are deprived of the genuine love of true friends? We can be cautious without becoming overly suspicious. And by all means, let us keep our own love and faith free of hypocrisy.--James 3:17; 1 Peter 1:22

    Cautious but not overly suspicious? No mention of boldly exposing hypocritical behavior? How strange . . .

  • minimus
    minimus

    Hillary, you haven't failed me yet......Regarding being a hypocrite, we all are at one time or another. I felt like the biggest hypocrite everytime I gave a talk or part on the value of the ministry when I, myself, didn't enjoy service or want to go. I was hypocritical when I would agree that a brother should not have certain responsibilites because he was not exemplary in the ministry. And I was also getting below the congregation average. I've been a hypocrite with myself and people, but no animals.

  • drwtsn32
    drwtsn32

    Yes, I think all JWs are hypocritical in one way or another. eg, JWs tell those of other religions that they shouldn't be afraid to seriously examine their current faith to find fault with it. (JWs of course won't do this themselves.) Also, ever have someone at the door say "My minister told me not to talk to you JWs." That was frustrating as JWs, but we of course would blindly accept anything our "leaders" say.

    One of the things that I can be proud of since I'm not a JW is that all of my opinions are my own. I don't have to tell someone they should/shouldn't do something when I wouldn't even follow my own advice.

  • Balsam
    Balsam

    This is a subject that I have really felt bad about at times because of my children. But in all honesty, it was only toward the last that happen.

    I remained true to the witnesses direction till the last 3 years of being a JW. I was considered a good JW my most people who knew me during that 29 years. I did gradually slip away from the forced mentality. Most of all I regret not being honest with my sons, because they could see I was acting hypocritically in the end compared to how I was in the years before. I did not have the heart to tell them I was having doubts about the JW's form of religion. As a parent I felt I had to take the lead, trouble was I was not sure where I was heading. It wasn't until my middle son died from a car accident and refusal of blood for him as he was dying that I knew I was absolutely going to leave. It was the event that was the catalyst to forcing me to make decision. How sad that JW's have to face tragedy to make them wake up.

    But yes I feel I was hypocrite at least for time, but it was out of indecision. I know it is such a pain in the behind to those who knew me well, to see the complete turn around in my life. Even proclaiming the WTS is wrong. Such a slap in the face of active witnesses. No wonder they look at us with distain calling us apostates. They just can't fathom why. I remember myself wondering the same thing about people who leave the JW and become what I viewed as hateful. It just boggled my mind. I had some ex-jw's who left look with pure hatred at JW when they saw them. I didn't understand, but I do now.

    That is probably why I will not give any JW I run into hateful looks, I remember the puzzlement I felt when they did that to me when they left the congregation or was disfellowshipped.

    Balsam

  • freein89
    freein89

    I am willing to say here and now that I was a hypocrite and a self righeous bitch. Pardon my lanquage but it is what it is. When I was an elders wife I was just like all the rest, then when the shoe was on the other foot, after he was disfellowshipped, I got a taste of my own medicine. I had been a nice and kind person, caring-really. But power corrupts, even the vicarious power of an elders wife.

    I have felt much shame about my attitude, I wasn't mean to people but I had a mindset and an attitude, I had worked very hard to be the perfect wife in the perfect family, what a sham and a shame. I don't know if there is a god, but I do believe there is a force in the universe that keeps people humble, and I got what was coming to me and I am grateful for the lesson.

    By the way, I had helped my husband with many of his talks, when he didn't know what to say he came to me and I supplied, I wonder how many other "elderettes" are out there?

    with a humbled heart

    Deb

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