"Secret Online Affairs"

by YoursChelbie 53 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Prisca

  Dmouse, don't you see what you wrote?

  I have had an 'affair' for over five years now with a woman that lives in another country.

  We can never meet. But she fulfils all my spiritual and emotional needs. I love her in the deepest sense of the word.

  My wife knows I communicate with her but not that we are any more than friends.

  She is my light, my warmth, my sound, my whole sense of being.

  No religion has a truer or more noble advocate than this woman, a woman who has garnered my deepest respect and has stopped my atheist tendency in its tracks due to her sincere and deeply held convictions as a Christian.

  I hurt her recently with my sheer thoughtlessness and it nearly killed me when I realised.

  Susan, I cannot say how much you mean to me...

  You're in love with this woman. And if your wife knew how much you cared for this woman, she would say that you've already cheated on her emotionally.

  Ask yourself this: If distance wasn't a problem, would your relationship with "Susan" still be purely platonic?

  You and Susan are much more than "friends" IMO.
• 

  TresHappy

  My coworker told me today that she is no longer going to try to contact this stamp guy. She told me that he figured out that she was contacting him under that other screen name. He then called her up here at work and said that if she contacted him again, he would tell her husband! She said she is planning to separate from her husband anyway, but she doesn't want any further conflict from this stamp guy. I asked her how she was going to deal with it, and she said she is getting rid of her home computer for the time being because she finds herself on the Internet for 2 hours a night. I am glad she got her act together, but it took the threat from jerky stamp guy to get her into reality.
• 

  ESTEE

  You and Susan are much more than "friends" IMO.

  What Prisca says is also my perception of your situation, dmouse ... You are waaaaay past friends. An emotional affair is well under way here!

  ESTEE
• 

  Nosferatu

  Online affairs don't make sense to me. It's just a conversation with descriptive words. How in the hell is reading and typing text on your computer monitor cheating? In my opinion, it's just a sexual conversation with flirting. I find it amusing, not stimulating.

  In my opinion, an affair CANNOT occur unless sexual touching is involved.
• 

  stillajwexelder

  in fact you could say it is either e-flirting or e-foreplay
• 

  xjw_b12

  Well I guess if I replied to this thread, it wouldn't be so secret anymore ........
• 

  rocketman

  Fascinating topic.
• 

  dmouse

  You and Susan are much more than "friends" IMO.

  I'm not disputing it. I said I loved her and I meant it. But there are different types of love.

  I love Susan as I would a very dear sister, combined with a strong friendship built up over the years. Is that wrong?

  I first started talking to her on the old H2O board and we had many theological discussions. After the board went pear shaped we kept up communication. But we have always behaved properly (she is married and a Christian). Of course we have raised this issue of propriety, neither of us want to be deemed as being unfaithful to our partners. I asked for my wife's permission to maintain contact and she said yes. My emails have always been open and I would have no worry about my wife reading them.

  If I get no emotional, intellectual or spiritual contact with my wife (and she went cold long before I met Susan) what am I supposed to do when I find a lifeline in the form of a friend?

  I can honestly say, in answer to your question Prisca, that our relationship would stay platonic even if we lived next door to each other because that's the sort of people we are.

  Or do you believe, as did Nietzsche, that men and women cannot be friends without sexual intimacy?
• 

  Pistoff

  ah mr mouse, I fear you are fooling yourself. Human nature is much stronger than the social conventions and religious convictions we have; if you were in person with this woman, your mutual love would seek it's most complete realization.
• 

  Athanasius

  Nothing secret.