My mother and her reaction to me being "gay"

by logansrun 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • logansrun
    logansrun

    No, I'm not gay. Still, this story is interesting.

    Recently I began dating a very fine young lady -- my first "girlfriend" ever, really. I'll spare the onerous and boring details of my life, but as some of you know I still live at home with my JW mother. (no comments from the peanut gallery ) For whatever reason I decided to not tell her that I've been seeing a "worldly girl." I probably should have, but I didn't. I know my mom's worldview and simply didn't care to deal with her reaction to me living a normal life and all that that entails (read: sex).

    So, it's been about four or five weeks. I've been getting home a little on the late side due to the luscious lips...er...my car that just wouldn't get out of "park." My typical excuse has been that I was at my best friends house. My mother's suspicion grew.

    Well, on Saturday my beau and I went to Wrigleyville to watch the Cubs playoff game and then met my best friend at the Green Mill -- a marvelous jazz bar in Chicago, do see it if you visit -- for some drinks and music. We left around 1 AM and we were just exhausted. I didn't feel like driving her all the way home and then have to drive back to my house, so we went to a hotel. Something told me this would not be the best time to tell my mother that I had a girlfriend and we would be at a hotel having a wild, orgasmic time before we hit the sack, so I called to let her know I was staying at my buddie's house.

    Big mistake.

    She calls my buddie's house in the morning and...well, you know the rest. "Where are you, Brad and where were you last night?"

    I get home on Sunday around noon and the questions begin. Blah, blah, blah....

    "I just want to know one thing...."

    "What's that?"

    "If it's true, then I don't think you can live here anymore....I mean, I just don't think I could accept that."

    "What is it? Just spit it out."

    "Are you gay?!"

    Holy shit. My mom thought I was gay. As I started laughing she proceeded to tell me her reasoning -- how I "never notice a pretty girl" and "once said George Clooney was 'good looking'"....hehehe....

    I assured her I definitely was not gay (I'd like to say I'm a lesbian nymphomaniac at heart ), although I said I was offended she would put me out of the house if I was and that I have no problem with homosexuals. I told her I had a girlfriend and showed her a picture to prove it. She was relieved.

    Evidently, she made the connection that I spent the night with her. For whatever reason she seemed alright with that. (I guess she didn't like it, but viewed it as "normal") Her final words as our conversation ended, "well, I'm glad you're not gay."

    Seriously, I don't know if I should be relieved or appalled. I'm relieved she's okay with her son being an immoral, apostate heterosexual, but appalled that she is so incredibly homophobic and was ready to kick me out of the house (!) if I was swinging the other way.

    This made me appreciate what a hard time GLBT folk have in the world. My mother could stand me rejecting her god but she would not tolerate me if I got off on men. There's just something wrong with that.

    Bradley

  • sens
    sens

    arh well...stranger things have happend

  • SanFranciscoJim
    SanFranciscoJim

    Tell her you're straight, but that the Fab Five gave you a queer makeover.

  • JH
    JH

    Maybe in her mind, if you're gay it's for life, but if you're an apostate, you could one day come back.

    The lesser of the two evils in her mind.

  • logansrun
    logansrun

    JH,

    Maybe in her mind, if you're gay it's for life, but if you're an apostate, you could one day come back.

    The lesser of the two evils in her mind.

    But, think about it: If I was gay and it was for life that would mean I would have no choice in the matter (my mother once said she thought homosexuality was genetic). She should be more accomodating then, not less. On the other hand, being an "apostate" (lol) was my choice (sort of). That, in the typical JW's mind, is the worst sin possible. Strange. Bradley

  • JH
    JH

    27 y
    Birthday!

    Happy Birthday Bradley.

  • Swickley
    Swickley

    Since you're 27 yrs old, I'm surprised that she still "polices" your activities...???

    For your own sanity, move out of there! Otherwise, you'll not escape the analized tunnel vision of the programmed JW mother.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine
    Well, on Saturday my beau and I went to Wrigleyville to watch the Cubs playoff game and then met my best friend at the Green Mill -- a marvelous jazz bar in Chicago, do see it if you visit

    One can understand her confusion, lol. "beau and I"? "marvelous jazz bar"? *poor mom*

  • Swickley
    Swickley

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY

  • bittersweet
    bittersweet

    wow...that's terrible. This is the reason a lot of gay people stay in the closet so long.One would hope that a parents love would be unconditional, but it isn't always the case. How sad. I guess you should consider yourself lucky that you're not gay, otherwise you'd be out on your behind.

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