Son in Hospital.

Gordy

On New Years Eve morning, my son (28) ex-JW, DA'd 3 years ago, went to see the doctor, he hadn't been feeling well for a while, tired and run down.

They took some blood for a test, at 5:15pm the doctor rang him up to say their was an ambulance on the way his blood count was only 5.7, should be 13. He was very aneamic, which would explain the tiredness. Next day they gave him 2 units of blood and another 2 units the next day. He had no hesitation in accepting the blood.

He wondered how his JW mother would react to him having blood, he was ready with all the arguments. She came to visit with his younger brother. He told her what treatment he had had, his brother sort of held his breath, but she never said a word about it. Nor mention it on other visits. This is a woman who at one time wouldn't buy red coloured sweets because she believed that blood was usued in the colouring, or certain brands of tinned meat, or stock cubes etc.

Incidently she would time her visiting, so that she didn't run into me when I visited.

Another difference was that at the church we both now attend, when I walked in I was inundated with people asking about him. Giving me cards for him. They even prayed for him during the service. Also he had many from the church visit him in hospital.

I remember when I was very ill, for about 2 weeks, when I was a JW. When I went back to the KH most of them didn't even notice I hadn't been there. One Elder said "You missed a couple of important meetings" even he didn't know I had been ill, and I was a MS!!

Anyway my son is now recovered, his blood count was up to 11 by the time he left hospital, and they have put him on a course of iron tablets.

blondie

Sorry, to hear about your son, Gordy.

I'm glad your church knows how to show their love.

I remember when I was very ill, for about 2 weeks, when I was a JW. When I went back to the KH most of them didn't even notice I hadn't been there. One Elder said "You missed a couple of important meetings" even he didn't know I had been ill, and I was a MS!!

Did they even looked embarrassed when you told them, Gordy?

An elder told me this story about the congregation where he first was appointed an elder. There was an older sister with a non-JW husband. She had been attending for faithfully attending for years. Then suddenly she stopped. No one knew why. Finally, after 6 weeks this new elder grabbed another elder and they went to call on her. The husband answered the door saying, "It's about time you guys got here, we buried her 3 weeks ago." I guess no one had phones or knew how to use them to check and see about this woman. It certainly taught the husband something about JWs.

Blondie

Soledad

gordy I hope your son gets better soon

The husband answered the door saying, "It's about time you guys got here, we buried her 3 weeks ago."

how sick is that.

mouthy

Glad your son is on the mend now.That is good news Thank God he wasnt a JW now. I remember when I was in hospital having my ulcers operated on ( Vagotamy & Polygotamy) Just One old brother ( one of the remanant ) came to see me.Very old brother & he had a big hill to climb to the hospital. I had to go out scrubbing floors a couple of weeks after that operation as we had no money!!!! NO one sent a card or called or anything. Yet they all used to say I was a Wonderful sister. RIGHT!!!! What is that song called "WHERE IS THE LOVE"? NOT at the Kingdum Hell that is for sure.......

blondie

I don't know if I gave the wrong impression, but this non-JW husband had spent 3 weeks wondering why no one had checked to see how his wife was doing, Soledad. He was trying to make a point to the "brothers" and their lack of interest and concern.

I can remember reading on a JW board recently the sad cry from a sister who had been sick for 2 weeks and everyone had assumed they had been on vacation although the congregation knew they had no money for food let alone a vacation. That happened to someone in my family. They were sick for 3 weeks in the hospital, no one had noticed they were gone. I have a million stories about the lack of concern or notice ill ones have received from those in the congregation. I always thought they should have an elder position called "Apostle to the Sick."

Blondie

medstudent

Hey Gordy,

I'm glad to hear your son didn't get ill when he was still a JW, because it would have been a lot harder to treat him without blood!

My grandfather passed away awhile ago and he was an elder and a very lovely man to everyone. He and my grandmother used to pick up whoever wanted for the congregation and always visited and helped the ill JWs (and non-JWs they knew). He literally did everything for everyone until he got cancer as well. He sometimes had arguments with other elders because he thought differently than he did and sometimes they made him feel horrible while he was the most wise and lovely man i ever met in my life. When he was in the hospital many people came to visit and also to the funeral when he died. An elder who my grandfather considered to be his best friend gave the lecture at the funeral. When he came over to the house to talk the speech through he wanted me to leave the room. My grandmother refused and told him I was her dearest grand child, JW or not. After the funeral he left immediately and my grandmother never saw him again. A month after he died a sister called her to ask why she hadn't be to the kingdom hall yet, she just had to get over his death (even though they were together for more than 60 years!) and go to the kingdom hall because that would be the best for her. Even though brothers and sisters lived approximately 3 minutes away from her house, my parents used to drive up there (an hours drive) every weekend to do her groceries, otherwise she would have died of hunger. In about 2 months after my grandfather died she hadn't had a visit of more than 3 sisters. An elder called her 6 months later and asked for my grandfather, didn't even knew he died! Luckily my dear grandmother moved near to my parents so they can take care of here. She now is even more connected to the cong of my parents than the one in which she and my grandfather put so much effort for 48 years!

Sad isn't it. May my grandfather rest in peace

medstudent

acsot

I have a million stories about the lack of concern or notice ill ones have received from those in the congregation.

I have another one for ya Blondie! In March it'll be a year since my mother's strokes and heart attack. No shepherding call, no elder's wives have visited, not even the C.O. came by. The P.O. asked me (as he was walking by my house one day) if the C.O. had been to visit (shouldn't the P.O. be aware of those who need visiting and inform the C.O.?) When I replied in the negative he seemed a bit embarrassed and said "oops, somebody goofed". I felt like saying "you goofed you indifferent apathetic idiot" but my mum was listening. I said nothing, just stared at him. I think I made him uncomfortable, you know how people start to stutter and look for their words when they don't know what to say? Well, haven't heard a peep from him since.

This has been to my advantage, since I have no desire whatsoever to be around elders or even go to a meeting, but sometimes I wonder how much my mother clues in about the lack of attention, or if she even cares at this point.

I feel really bad for those older or sick JWs who don't have anybody. What was it Jesus said, we'd gain mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters by being his followers? Well, at least we know where not to go.

Oops, Gordy I am so sorry! I hijacked this thread and didn't even acknowledge what you posted! I am so happy your son "saw the light" and is doing well. Isn't it awful how JW emotions can be shut on and off so easily!

blondie

Make that a million and one, acsot. I'm so sorry. If I were nearer....

To you Gordy, your son, acsot, her mum, and all those out there suffering.

Blondie

acsot

Thanks Blondie, I know. But I am determined that one day you and I will meet!

Sassy

I am glad your son is going ok too Gordy. It can be so scary with stuff like that so when the situations gets positive, we sure are thankful..

Regarding missing meetings do to illness: The first two and a half months of last year I was out sick. I probably should have been in the hospital.. no one cared either.. no one called.. it was ok though.. I went to one meeting the week before memorial and no one talked to me.. I attended the memorial and only one person even said hello.. and that was it.. never went back.. No one has bothered to call and see where I am either.. oh well.. now I know I don't need to be there any more.

Son in Hospital.

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