One thing JWs do, and especially elders, is COUNSEL people. Everything is all about setting a person straight. Even Bible students are conditioned to be counseled and to do the same toward any that ask them questions as to what they believe. Older sisters are to counsel younger ones. Families are continuously helped to see that they need counsel, either from the head of the house or Jehovah himself........Do you recalled being counseled because you didn't measure up or because you were deemed to have a bad attitude???
Were You Ever Counseled For Your Attitude or Because You Didn't Measure Up?
by minimus 36 Replies latest jw friends
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JH
My hours in the service varied greatly because of my job. So, some months I spent less than the average in the field service. The elders didn't like seeing my hours vary from 60 hours a month to only 2 hours a month. They wanted stability in my hours.
They said that I should never go below the congregations's average of 10 hours a month. I told them, that if the average is 10 hours a month, then some do more and some do less. They didn't accept that logic.
The moment they started criticizing me, I did less and less. I knew my capacity and they didn't accept it.
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Phantom Stranger
Amazingly, I was never counseled for a bad attitude... must be a recent development. Iwas a star in the making - #4 talks as a teen, in charge of audio, etc.
I was counseled for having my car parked outside a single sister's house late at night... but that's another story.
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seeitallclearlynow
I don't remember ever being counseled for my bad attitude, I just knew I had one about a lot of things, but of course, I felt justified!
They did mention once not to "interpret" any world events, as I was doing after 9-11. But mildly, and not directly to me alone.
If they bothered with me at all, they pretty much just seemed to try to be real nice. I didn't make it very easy for them, though, because of extreme shyness. I found it very very hard to even look at elders, except when they weren't looking!
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seeitallclearlynow
Come to think of it, I was officially counseled, together with my daughter, for talking and laughing with my disfellowshipped minor son at the Kingdom Hall. I wasn't supposed to even smile at him, and not even talk to him in the parking lot, even though we lived together, and rode together. We could talk once the car door and the windows were closed.
Brother.
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outoftheorg
For some reason, none of the elders ever counseled me on anything. Maybe my bearing and personality made them reconsider going that route.
I got lots of looks that weren't friendly and saw others talking and both glancing at me, so I assumed they were talking about me.
I always lifted weights and worked out, so I was muscular. A few times when this happened and I did not have a jacket on, I would stare back at them and casually flex my upper arms.
For some reason this always seemed to disturb them. ????
Once another young elder turned down my invitation to bring his family and meet mine in a restaurant.
He told me that he and his family would not associate with us. He never gave a reason and I was not about to ask.
Each and every episode like these, are responsible for my not staying in the borg.
It got to the point that I no longer wanted to associate with them.
I haven't for the last 13 years now.
Outoftheorg
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minimus
Seeit, isn't it a shame that the elders tried to legislate to parents even smiling, laughing or talking to a disfellowshipped child? It's SICKENING!
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ScoobySnax
Minimus.....It might suprise you to know that I was NEVER counselled. I was a good boy. If they could only get a hold of me now......Lordy. Where would they start?
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minimus
Scoob, what do YOU think they'd counsel you for?
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ScoobySnax
Where would they start?
Erm.....
Drinking too much
Smoking
Loose Conduct...... emphasize on this one
Fraternising with apostates ( ! )
....................... more will come to me I'm sure........etc etc