My Wife Wants To Go To The Memorial! (page 4)

gitasatsangha

Minimus,

The last meeting I ever went to was a memorial. Maybe it's a nice way to cap off your JW career.

Phantom Stranger

Not counting funerals, that's true for me as well.

Was your last Memorial, the last one on purpose or did it just work out that way? Personally, I remember sitting there, in this hall where there was no one I even know, thinking "What the hell am I doing here?" It was my last attempt to go back to the meetings. I managed to dodge the handshaking gammut of welcomers at the door, and that was the last time I was in a Kingdumb Hell.

Phantom Stranger

'Bout the same here, g. I had pulled off a successful fade... but was getting pressure from my parents (we lived in different states) to go to memorial. I went for the same reason Min is thinking about going, and I, like he and you, also went somewhere where no one would know me. I avoided being known, too. As I left that night, I knew that I would never go back - for me personally, escaping the pressure was not worth the bullsh!t - and aside from my dad's funeral, I have not. I think that was 18 years ago this year.

And I appreciate, min, that I was not married at the time...different situations, I know.

family_man

Minimus,

I don't know much about much in the way of the difficulty of fading away from the memorial, but I think it's great your being supportive.

I know it's especially tough when it's an issue you don't agree with. Even though my wife is rapidly coming to her senses we still read the NWT and she pray's to Jehova God (w/ head covered) - I just keep quite and mind my own business.

We were thinking about going to the memorial, but I think she wants to experience it as an objective observer... although she still acknowledges it for the special day it is meant to be....I will likely go just out of support ... and If I get hungry , well?

Just my $ 0.02 ...

FM

jimbob

Hey Min. I know you've got all kind of suggestions and opinions on this subject. But I wanted to give you mine and my experience with my wife.

After we quit the borg, my wife still had a spiritual side, as a lot of women do. She wanted to go to the Memorial when it finally came around. It was like the one thing she wanted to hold on to, and she said she felt somewhat guilty if she didn't go. She even made arrangements with my mother to go to her hall for it. Well, the week of the Memorial, she started getting cold feet, as she felt that going back to the Kingdumb hall would make her feel somewhat uncomfortable. When the big day came, she totally backed out and gave my mother an excuse as to why she couldn't make it.

My point here is.....once she actually missed the memorial, she realized she didn't feel as guilty as she thought she would, and now she has no desire to go at all. She doesn't even give it a second thought. So hopefully your wife will realize she shouldn't feel guilty for not going, and if she really wants to celebrate it....celebrate it at home with some really nice red wine and bread. Nowhere in the bible does it say you have to do it with a bunch of hypocritical fools! Anyway, I'm sure she'll find her way......good luck to you!

Black Sheep

When your wife looks at you in such a way that shows she feels a certain way but would HOPE that you might accompany her to something you don't believe in, then sometimes, you do something for the benefit of your family, to please, yes---even to compromise..........

I know what you mean Minimus, having been to many Memorials for the same reason.

I haven't been invited yet. I doubt that I will be now that I have come out and said I believe the Borg is shonky.

jaded

The Memorial was the last meeting that I attended after missing meetings for many months. I was very uncomfortable and knew that I would never again set foot in a KH. Haven't regretted that decision for one minute. Maybe your wife will feel the same after attending.

eyeslice

I am sure I will be going.

My wife was very supportive of me after I stepped down as an elder and went through a very difficult period still attending the meetings, assemblies, etc. Therefore, I am happy to support her on occassions when she will feel uncomfortable on her own.

eyeslice

minimus

Thanks again for all the positive feedback! We'll be discussing this over the weekend.

My Wife Wants To Go To The Memorial!

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