ist time!

by lee 31 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Winston Smith :>D

  it was all about what should i be doing to please whoever,

  It's a new thought for most people to try to find what their AUTHENTIC INNER SELF really is.

  It is easier to attach your ideals to a group mentality than to find and then carry through with what you really truly believe in.

  Some find comfort leaving the JW's and then becoming a member of another group that is closer to what they perceive God to be.

  To me, I didn't want to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire, namely trade one counterfeit religion for another one.

  So I feel it is important to search out points of view that you would have never considered before as a JW.

  Plus it is enlightening to be able to look into other belief's free of judgment as a JW.

  did you struggle with confidence or is that just me?

  I do. It's humiliating to admit that you were 'duped' into a cult a good part of your life. It's a tough pill to swallow admitting that all the while I was condemning others door to door I was really in a cult.

  But such an experience isn't a total loss. Realizing that all of my hard work as a JW was for a lost cause is teaching myself humility and understanding of others.

  Compassion and empathy are things some never learn in life. Enduring such an experience has given me a lesson that I may have never have learned otherwise, therefore enriching my total life experience.

  I am finding that confidence should come from interdependence with humanity and not from independence to just stand on my own.
• 

  reganashe

  I really understand and I think all of us do. I remember the first christmas tree I bought, my girlfriend who was still a JW came over and I picked up the tree and hide it in the closet because I felt guilty that I had it, damn pine needles were everywhere. Really it will pass, I promise.

  Regan Ashe
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  pc

  Lee, This is one place you will not feel alone. Almost everyone here has some of the same baggage. It's like our own secret society. (I really hate that word)! It's probably one of the only places where people can understand exactly what your feeling. It is a great place to express your feelings and also get some incredible information. All I can say is WELCOME and here's to much better days!

  (I'm so proud of my technical advances since joining here LOL)
• 

  peacefulpete

  We too found the feelings overwhelming and confusing. We benefitted much from learning about high control groups and how they use techniques (consciously or not) that suppress rational thinking and personal development. I recommend a web site ,"American Family Foundation (AFF), as it deals with this topic in depth, offering the newest and best psychological expertise. There is a section there that defines what a high control group is and how they work. Print off articles by leading researchers. You can also buy lectures and materials for a small amount used to support this nonprofit organization. Also many have found Steve Hassan's book "Releasing the Bonds, empowering people to think for themselves" to be insightful and helpful. Self esteem issues are his focus. Hang in there, please don't trade one problem for another.
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  jst2laws

  Lee, Good to have you join us. My wife and I were disfellowshipped about this time last year for apostasy. We thought we would fade away but could not keep our mouths shut. We are MUCH happier now to not worry about who finds out how we really feel about things or who notices who is visiting our home. The guilt will go away some day, Lee. The Watchtower says people like us loose our sense of guilt because we damage our conscience and it no longer responds properly. Our guilt went away as we read one book after another exposing the fraud of the Watchtower. Now it is so clear and documented we can not believe it took us so long to open our eyes. If you want to accelerate the process of getting past the guilt try Crisis of Conscience by Ray Franz www.Commentarypress.com If you are not the reading type, just hang around here with your eyes and ears open. You will be able to de-program yourself as you learn more of the Truth about the "truth". Jst2laws
  
  
  
  
• 

  BluesBrother

  Welcome to the club Lee.

  We have all been there, all done it . I still felt scared when I bought a friend a Christmas card last year. I could almost feel an elders hand on my shoulder.

  The best thing is finding out that many of us feel the same way . Perhaps we are the only ones who can really understand. But we do understand and are still feeling it sometimes.. Stay around and keep posting . I am sure you have a lot to offer
• 

  happehanna

  i just dont know what i want to do, its not a question i have asked myself much in the past, it was all about what should i be doing to please whoever, did you struggle with confidence or is that just me?

  I struggle daily with this but as time goes by I have been promised that I will struggle less. I am new here too and have found this forum the only place, where people really understand.

  Lee, take care and look after yourself please.
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  Farkel

  lee,

  In thirty years you will be thirty years older, and fortunate to have been able to enjoy things in life that are forbidden to JWs. You will not have wasted all those thousands of hours on repititious and mostly wasted studying of WT books, and attending their stupid meetings and assemblies. You will have not spent those thirty years bowing down and worshiping WTS leaders and local elders. You will have saved countless thousands of dollars by not buying their literature, which is worthless to begin with.

  In thirty years there will be JWs you now know who will have chosen to do all those miserable things I just mentioned and who are still preaching an end of the world that will never come, still worshiping those leaders who've lied to them their entire lives and will lie to them and deceive them for the rest of their lives.

  Celebrate being out! You've taken your life back from religious leaders and people who couldn't care less about you as a person.

  Farkel
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  Mulan

  Hi Lee, I can feel what you feel. I was there not too long ago. You eventually get used to doing the things you want, without guilt, and don't care if anyone sees you. You can always lie, if you get caught and say you were buying something for a neighbor, who is sick.

  Welcome to our little world. I'm sure you will find a lot of help here.
• 

  Valis

  It feels so disloyal to my parents, but i hate that religon its inhumane, does this mean anything to anyone on this site?

  well my friend first welcome to the forum! Let us talk about what loyalty to your children means. It means that you respect them and love them. Respect as an adult who has the right to make your own descisions. Love them for who they are and what they want to become. It also requires tollerance that is supposed to run two ways, which as you already know falls far short on thier part. They in fact are far more disloyal to you as thier child than you know. Join the great crowd! *LOL* Oh yeah and what Farkelmiester said.

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer