by run dont walk 34 Replies latest jw friends
well, ??????????
work, service, kingdom hall, nightlife, assembly, restaurant, what was you worst moment as a JW.
I'm sure we all have a top ten,
for me hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm,
I think my most embarassing was, telling a "BEAUTIFUL HOT HOT HOT" girl, I couldn't have sex with her, because I was a JW.
As Homer Simpson would say "DOH"
Trying to stifle a fart but being unable to as I got onto platform to give a Public Talk
When I was giving a talk, and my Mom was in the audience, giving me (as usual LOL) her little hand signals like "hurry up, you're running out of time."
But, one time, she kept giving me this "vertical" sign...I couldn't figure out what she meant, until finally I looked down and saw that my pants were unzipped. Turned around, zipped my pants, and continued on with my talk.
Hi run don't walk
Most embarrassing moment in J.W. land... hmm
How do I make this short.
Theocratic Ministry School. I was a young sister 11, 12, 13
A young brother sat in the audience and he had a bell that he would tap with his foot to ring when your time was up. If the bell rang you were to finish your sentence and leave the stage knowing you would be marked as going overtime.. and to work on that for next time.
I went up to give my talk with another sister and this attendant accidentally knocked the bell and rang it.
I finished my sentence, and walked off stage. THE END.
The funny part was that I had only said about 2 or 3 sentences before this bell rang.
I was embarassed because the bell rang.. but the most red faced was the bell ringer brother.
sincerely
Special K
I was at a former place of employment having lunch with about 10 construction guys at the table shooting the breeze when someone brings up JW's.
The conversation was those fing JW's this and those fing JW's that until I said totally embarrassed...I'm an Fing JW...they all laughed because I said fing but it was an awkward situation...the same thing happened again almost 10years later at a different employer....
Now I just join in, those fing JW's
January 1991, when I was 14 years old, out in service with Lou and Aimee and a few others one day, and we had to go all the way out to the country to make a return call, after having stopped at McDonald's for break. by the time we got out there, I had to pee, but I was told it would be impolite to disturb Lou and her householder during the return visit, so I had to hold it. she was at that call for 45 excruciating minutes, plus there was another half-hour drive back to town, and, no, they wouldn't pull over and let me pee by the side of the road, as that was considered a 'bad witness' to passing cars. once we'd dropped everyone else off, Aimee wanted me to wait until she got to a gas station so she could fill up her tank with the gas money she'd collected from everyone, plus she didn't take me seriously and was making jokes, trying to get me to laugh. I almost made it, but my poor bladder exploded as we pulled up to the tank. I left a wet spot on her seat as I ran for the bathroom, crying in shame. she totally freaked out and started yelling about how she was going to clean the seat. I ended up working for her mom Carol , cleaning a beauty salon, to pay for the upholstery cleaning.
oh, and then there's the time that I was raped by five guys, and Mark broke into his dad's congregation files and dug out the police report and showed all the guys in the congregation, and no one would dance with me at weddings, after that.
Hi Shotgun
Glad you joined the fing jw side.
special K
I went up to give one of my boring talks on the MS and we were supposed to go up as soon as the guy announced our names. So I got up there, sat down...and waited for my "householder". And waited...and waited...and waited. The whole congregation just sitting there staring at me. The dork brother running the show never got up to say anything or ask where my householder was. Well...she was in the bathroom shooting the breeze with some "sisters" and lost track of time. After about a couple of minutes (which seemed like an eternity to me) she comes rushing up the aisle and finally joins me. I could barely talk. Never an apology from this person either.
Good riddance. I hated the MS!!!!
Cathy L.
From the age of about 15 onwards, I had a problem during the final prayer..... For some reason every time the final prayer was about halfway through, I would get an erection. I don't know if it was somehow the excitement of the meeting being over and we get to go home, or whether it was the blood finally returning to my lower regions. I dunno. Now every meeting, I would sit down until the problem would subside, then I would go outside to the car.
Well, one day, some smarmy brother came from another congregation, and my sister knew him. As they were stood talking 2 rows in front of me, my sister decided to introduce us. The guy held out his hand for me to shake, and it was out of reach while I was sitting. I had to stand and reach over, but to hide my "problem" I tried to hunch over a little. I shook the guys hand and sat down as fast as possible. My sister asked me what was wrong with my back, I just said I pulled a muscle. To my horror though, my sister's hot best friend, who I hadn't yet noticed stood in my row, started snickering and grinning ear to ear at me. She saw it...
When I think back, it was stupid... but to a 16 year old, it was the end of the world.
FMZ
I was 16 and at an assembly. A DC. A big one. Right as they said "amen", my best friends little 8 yr. old bro thought it would be funny to pants me. My underwear came down too. Man, I've never pulled up my pants so fast in my life.
Same assembly. I had a bloody nose, a bad one. So, first aid stuck a "rhino rocket" Otherwise known as an OB tampon up my nose, to stop the bleeding, so I had to sit there with all the hot chix walking by, pointing at me, 'cuz I had a tampon hanging outta my nose. I did'nt go to an assembly at that district for years after that.
