What Makes Some ExJWs So Angry & Others So Pleasant???

minimus

From what I can see, it appears that some exWitnesses are either handling life outside the organization pretty well or not well at all. I wonder if some persons simply, by nature are angry, unhappy persons while others are naturally good, "honest-hearted ones" that simply want to find some measure of happiness. What do you think think???

LyinEyes

Personaly, I would say that I am a very angry person when it comes to things about the JW's ,,,,but also that I am bascially a happy pleasant person....if that makes any sense.

I feel that you can be angry, you can state your case , your reasons for being so,,,,,but not treat others in an unpleasant way.

The reason I am so angry is the injustice of what happened to me , personally as a child,,,as an adult even, and what is going on to so many who are still JW's . I hate to see others suffer and it is hard to not be able to stop it. I guess by showing my anger ,and speaking outloud about the things so many JW's , ex JW's have been thru,,,,,I feel it is my only contribution I can make ,,,,to make people aware of what is really going on within that organization.

The more voices that speak out, even if that voice sounds very angry,,,,,,,the more it will be heard.

Elsewhere

I'm happy and angry.

minimus

Lyin' & Elsewhere----how do you express the anger?

galaxy7

Im usually happy

then they start about Noah and how gods going to kill everyone

They remind me of the rabbit in alice in wonderland, running around telling everyone how late it is

I would be alot happier if I could tell them what I really think. But I dont

So I guess I could be happier

Scully

LMAO @ elsewhere

minimus, my feelings about leaving the JWs is that it involves a kind of grieving process, with all the facets of grieving a major loss: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. These are all the tasks of mourning, and not every person experiences them in the same way or to in that exact order or in the same degree. Sometimes the stages occur in cycles. There's no right or wrong way to grieve, but having other people who understand what it is like to be supportive and show that it is possible to survive and thrive afterward is very helpful to newer ones.

One thing is for sure though: being JWs has changed us; likewise so has becoming exJWs changed us.

Love, Scully

nilfun

There's ebb and flow between extremes, too. Not always so black/white, you know?

desib77

I think age may play a part in it. Someone who is older who leaves has wasted a larger part of their life then a younger person has and may feel more resentment. A younger person probably would be happier considering they found out they didn't believe at an early age and still has time to rectify it.

Just my thoughts....

Desi

yxl1

I'm angry that I had no choice in the matter

I'm angry that I never experienced X-mas/B'days etc as a child

I'm angry that mum allowed elders/MS/whoever publically discipline/humiliate us

I'm angry that I lived in constant fear of being killed at A.

I'm angry that I was "marked" by my congregation, yet no one would tell me why

I'm angry that I had to lead a double life just to have a friend or two

I'm angry that I feared demons would get me at night

I'm angry at the amount of physical abuse that went "unnoticed" in my old congregation

I'm angry that a bunch of old men had such a strong control over my life

I'm angry at myself for not putting my foot down as a child and refused to attend the KH

I'm angry that I has constantly kicked out of the house for refusing to attend the KH

I'm angry that I was never allowed to participate in national and internation athletics (or any extracurricular sport)

I'm angry that I was never allowed to attend Uni, and was encouraged to become a carpenter...(?) yeah go figure

I'm angry at the racism we had to swallow because a bad word could never be said about the elders.

However, the amount of anger I once had bottled up is now starting to fade. This site has helped me a lot. Its almost like I've had to re-open old wounds for them to heal back properly. I'll always be an angry guy, but as I'm getting older, all the shitty things I endured for the first 15 years of my life now almost seem like they happened to someone else. Also, in a really selfish kind of way, the experiences recorded on this site has made me realise that many of you had it a lot worse that I did...and thats a comfort.

LyinEyes

How do I express my anger? Bascially,,,,but not keeping quite anymore.

There are alot of things in the past that I was angry over , and the longer I held it inside , didnt say a word, bit my tounge so to speak,,,,the weaker I felt.

Now by just speaking outloud about things is the way I express my anger. I can express my anger, my disgust, a better word,,,,,hehe, without attacking anyone. It takes alot more patience and self control to talk to someone,,,,,,,,say an active JW who refuses to believe that there are major problems in the JW organization. Maybe some would understand the anger if we said it was ,,,,,,,"righteous indignation".

What Makes Some ExJWs So Angry & Others So Pleasant???

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