Does the Watchtower Society stunt personal development and growth

by truthseeker 64 Replies latest jw friends

  • truthseeker
    truthseeker

    With so many "responsibilities" given to the witnesses by the "faithful and discreet slave", there is little time for them to do anything these days except sleep - and that is when they're not out preaching at unearthly hours in the morning.

    The enormous pressure to perform, and to be under the watch of the elders to make sure you perform, is a draining experience.

    A book I have on Sociology says this regarding Jehovah's Witnesses, when discussing sects, that "they require intensive commitments and demonstrations of belief by members. Partly owing to their "outsider status" in society, sects frequently exhibit a higher degree of religious fervor and loyalty than more established religious groups."

    It is these "intensive commitments" to attend all the meetings and prestudy for them, preach at least 10 hours a month, and, if you are a brother, reaching out/or being expected to reach out, that contribute to the de-individualization of themselves.

    Yes, I made the word up - but it's the best I could come up with.

    De-individualization - a gradual erroding of the personality that we used to have prior to coming into contact with the JWs. If you were born in "the truth" then you probably felt like you never really developed the way you wanted to anyway, as is evidenced by the numerous experiences given here in this forum regarding growing up in the truth.

    This process of personality errosion causes other problems as well. Lack of individual reasoning ability starts to diminish, as Watchtower programming takes hold.

    You begin to forget your wants, your dreams, and your desires; as you devote your life to the bigwigs at Brooklyn and your congregation elders.

    In my old congregation, an elder remarked that many of those present seemed to have "no personality". Hillary_Step recently posted that one circuit overseer referred to "a shiftless generation"

    Why is it that Witnesses can't develop as individuals? The Society won't let them.

    Consider the following:

    (The sections below are not in any order, and also not everyone conforms to these. This is simply how the Society would like its members to behave and function)

    1) No one must shine - Individuals are not allowed to shine, or be skillful at anything. Were you ever encouraged to use your talents (other than for WTS purposes)? Did a friend suggest going to college/university to "be something"? Likely, if they were party-line followers, they would not have done this. Did your parents let you go to college? Did they want you to succeed in a career? Or as a full time preacher?

    Step 1 - errosion of individal worth, through lack of education, and lack of encouragement to get an education.

    2) All must be equal - While it's true that no one wants to be less than equal, the cultural transmission in the Society is that there is generally no healthy competition among the friends. Ever watched a bunch of witnesses play sports? There are exceptions of course to what I state here, but many of the elders seem to hate competition, or winning. True, it is just a game, but discouaring healthy competition can make a person feel that they have already achieved their potential and feel that they don't have to try any harder. One sister recently said regarding a game of football, that "no one should think they're above one another."

    Step 2 - all must be equal - no healthy competition of any kind.

    3) No time to develop serious hobbies/interests

    How many times have you heard the friends say, "I wish I had time to do this or to do that..." You realize then, how much time is taken up by the religion, and how little time they let you have. Truly, they devour our time, leaving us with little or no energy after a hard weeks work to even want to develop our hobbies and interests. Some friends never explore their potential, rather they just talk about what they'd like to do. Five meetings a week, endless personal and prestudy, and regular preaching activity, kills any time one may have for their own interests. The Society piles on the guilt to auxiliary or regular pioneer, making some of the friends feel they are not doing enough for "Jehovah,"

    Step 3 - devoting your time to the Society, kills off most of the time you would have for hobbies and interests

    4) No recognition

    Have you ever been recognised for the time you put in the ministry? While preaching is a commandment, there is generally no recognition for a job well done. From recent reports and experiences, it seems that the elders just aren't commending the friends enough. But you don't have to be an elder to say, "Job well done." Short of having your name read out when you apply to pioneer in some way, there is little recognition for the many hours that the friends put into the ministry.

    Step 4 - no recognition for hard work makes the friends feel like they're not doing enough. Therefore, a guilt trip develops.

    5) No Society sponsored gatherings, festivals

    Most religions have organised celebrations and festivals. This brings people together, forms friendships, and provides recreation for the kids and teens. But, the Society, with their billions of dollars, cannot even organise through the congregations, a JW Youth outreach program, or a day trip for the elderly. In my congregation, there was only ever 1 day out for the elderly in about 25 years. The only sponsored events, are of course the assemblies and conventions. Here, the Society tell you that you should not go out for lunch as you should be spending your lunch break associating with the friends. But, how many strangers came up to you at the intermission and asked about you or where you come from? How mcuh real association goes on between strangers?

    Step 5 - no association means no friends, no social life, no sponsored JW Youth events, no outings or day trips for the elderly. This contributes much to loneliness, even suicide because of the lack of human interest. Any free time is usually encouraged to be spent in the ministry.

    6) Don't pursue education

    Some of this is covered in section 1, but the emphasis is for JW youth not to pursue a career. Hence, any thoughts that a young witness has about becoming a doctor, a nurse, an artist or any other profession is laid to waste. The Society only encourages education, for the soul purpose of supporting yourself in the "full time pioneer mininstry."

    Step 6 - no encouragement to pursue a career kills off desires that you had to work in a desirable profession.

    7) Lack of social skills

    when you take into account all that is required of the witnesses, very little time is left to pursue anything else. This means, that some of the friends grow up socially dysfunctional, unable to hold a conversation for more than 20 seconds. After asking the usual, "how's it going, how's work", most of them leave you. Others never really listen to you and are looking for someone else to "love bomb" The constant "encouragement" the Society gives to "widen out in your association" only makes the friends feel like they are doing this to obey the Society - hence, spontaneous and genuine interest in other people is sadly lacking - even non-existent.

    Step 7 - with a lack of social skills, particularly holding conversations about "off-world" topics, witnesses find it hard to be themselves, and have something interesting worth saying.

    8) Lack of interest in the environment and community

    Because the "end is soon", the friends are not encourged to do charitable works, to develop their people skills, or to become a more developed member of society. Hence, any thought of doing something to help the environment, volunteering in a hospital, or a soup kitchen is discourgaged, as "Jehovah will see to it."

    Step 8 - This lack of interest in environment and the communities does not foster personal growth and satisfaction. The JW never thinks about the homeless man on the street and how he gets fed. The JW sees volunteers in action at hospitals, but never stops to think, "What can I do to help." Always waiting for the, "end" their desire to help others is never nurtured.

    Why is personal growth and development so difficult for JW's to develop? Most of the above points are the reason for this.

    If you came into the truth, ask yourself - how did the programming of the Society affect me individually. While you may have quit smoking, taking drugs and other practices, and put on the "new personality" to some extent, were you ever encouraged to be a somebody instead of a nobody?

  • franklin J
    franklin J

    a resounding YES

    The WTBTS does inhibit personal growth; abiliity to reason; creativity; anything to do with being an individual.

    I faded in my early 20s, and my life literaly blossomed after I left.

    been there; done that

    Frank

  • shotgun
    shotgun

    Definetly

  • happehanna
    happehanna

    In my case Yes and when I left I found I had no dreams, no goals, no ambition, no proper hobbies no outside life, I was and still am to a point, floundering. Thats why the term the Borg is so apt.

  • Theocrat
    Theocrat

    I don't know guys...its kinda hard to apply a one-size-fits-all "Sect Identification Kit" to any one group, considering the peculiarities within that group. As far as the ministry intensive atmosphere of Jehovah's Witnesses, all I will say is this: look at Jesus...look at the Apostles...look at the 120 who recieved God's Spirit at Pentecost. A Christian eats it, drinks it, and sleeps it. Don't fool yourselves. Forget what the WTBS says...what does Jesus say? "Narrow and cramped is the road to salvation, and few are on it."

    Now, about what I really wanted to comment on: personal growth stunted?

    Again, every place is different. But let me tell you about me. I started working in broadcasting at the early age of 14. Got my first afternoon drive show at 15, and now I'm very established in the radio broadcasting industry. I've been on the air ever since I started. I anchor sports on TV part-time. I have my own voice-over business and do voiceovers/commercials for places all over the country. Whats the attitude been from elders and others in the organization? Well, I was appointed a ministerial servant when I was 19. Now I'm a pioneer. I constantly get attention and praise on my speaking ability and voice. Everybody thinks its cool that I do what I do for a job. Everybody is full of questions about it. Everybody tells me that I was born for the radio business. No big deal. Here's what underscores the whole topic that is INTERPRETED as "stunting personal growth": BALANCE. It is the duty of the faithful slave to admonish us to put the Kingdom first. If we work 8 hours a day, sleep 8 hours a day, then whats a wiser course? Spend the other 8 hours a day at a second job just so we can afford something we don't really need OR spend that time as Jesus would, or the Apostles, or the other early Christians? Say what you want about the WTBS but don't forget whose world this is. We can work ourselves to death, with what to show for it. I want to make a name with God, not leave behind an impressive 401K account because I worked myself to the grave.

  • Leolaia
    Leolaia

    Excellent post. It's not always so bad. One of my parents was not in the "trooth" and so I was encouraged to have friendships outside of the bOrg, and I spent quite a bit of time in recreational activities. In fact, I really was only involved in the bOrg during the five weekly meetings (which I never prepared for unless I was to have a part) and the Saturday morning field service. Only occasionally did I do the "text" thing at school, and mostly I had not much to do with the bOrg in my free time. Most kids I knew were like me. But I also knew a few daughters of elders who had it real bad.

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    I agree for the most part.. we weren't allowed to be individuals and if we tried, we were reprimanded for it..

    That is a form abusers use to control. If they keep you down, don't let you feel good about yourself, you might not start to think for yourself and grow beyond.. or escape. No keep the blinders on and the focus only on what they want. The people are not important or their self worth.

  • Theocrat
    Theocrat

    If any of you are familiar with Uncle Larry Lujack from Chicago radio in the 70's...he always said, "its possible to think you're good at something and actually not be any good, but its impossible to be good at what you do and not know it."

    If the WTBS controls/discourages personal development, why the Theocratic Ministry School? A program that has made public speakers out of timid individuals.

  • willyloman
    willyloman
    I want to make a name with God, not leave behind an impressive 401K account because I worked myself to the grave.

    Theocrat feels this way because he cannot imagine ever having to rely on his 401k for retirement, since in his distorted view the world will have LONG passed away by then.

    When he is 60 and has a 401k balance of zero, and the world isn't any closer to his imaginary armageddon than it is now, he will sing a different tune.

  • Theocrat
    Theocrat

    When I am 60, and the end still hasn't come, I'll thank Jehovah that I'm still able to be a part of the most important work that the world has ever known. If it were God's will for me to be a businessman-ladder-climber who has his first heart attack at age 52, and then a pension, bag of old golf clubs, and a fat rear, then He wouldn't have sent His Son to earth to preach, He would have sent him to earth to invest in mud huts, and then diversify into adobe real estate.

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