by logansrun 67 Replies latest jw friends
The frustrating thing about the whole thing is I KNOW what to do. I can intellectually grasp why my life currently sucks and what can be done to correct it. I could write a dag-nabbed article on that shit if I had to! But I just.......can't........do.
B
Motivation issues, huh?
In the words of Nike "Just do it!!!"
Call the girl...
Logan...
You and I are the same person basically. Everything you said is EXACTLY what I've been going through for the past 12 years or so. It's really hard to learn how to make friends after the JWs have stunted your social growth. Sometimes I stay in my house for months and months without going out or seeing anyone other than my fiance. You're not alone, even if you feel like you are. Do you have any hobbies or interests? The only times I have been social and met new people after leaving the JWs was when I started a regional Tori Amos fan club. Since you live in Illinois, if you're a Tori Amos fan, you can join too! Or maybe you can find another local group that is into the same things you are into. It might be hard to walk into a new place and look at a bunch of new faces, but once you break the ice it is SO worth it. If you need any help finding or starting a social group in your area, let me know. I'll help as much as I can.
Ross,
As much as we disagree philosophically I always appreciate your kindly words. (I said "kindly"...you can take the boy out of the dubs but not....)
Meanwhile, tell me why you and Aztec haven't got it together....
Azzy's a great gal but I do believe our respective destinies lie elsewhere. You see, when I was born the Emperor knew too well that Vader's children would pose a threat. We were seperated at birth and my twin sister remains to this day safely anonymous.
B.
Man logun I can relate to ALOT of your crap that you have/had to deal with. About the only thing I can suggest is to keep trudging along. Pretty soon, you'll find your stride and things will seem to go alot more smoothly.
You need to talk? Drop me a line...I'll do my best to help out.
sometimes I feel that way too.. I went from a crapload of friends to one... SimpleSally.. having to rebuild and since we were never trained to make friends outside field service, not an easy task.
You said you know what to do, but you just can't. Have you thought about therapy?
I've taken up beer drinking lately. I find that it works wonders for my mood. LOL
But seriously, I hear ya bud, you've seen enough of me (probably too much!) on this forum to know that my head gets pretty out of whack a lot of the time. I know you've posted in praise of Albert Ellis but IMO REBT has limited value. Perhaps some serious analysis with a professional regarding the f*cked up family you grew up in might help?
Wish I had some good advice, but I don't. Except the beer part.
steph (mind if I call you steph?),
You and I are the same person basically.
Like Jesus and God. I love it.
Everything you said is EXACTLY what I've been going through for the past 12 years or so.
Holy shit, you mean I've got ten more years to go???
Do you have any hobbies or interests?
I said I felt guilty about masturbating till I was 25. I'm 27 now.....j/k. My hobbies include books, martinis (by myself or with my all too MALE best friend), jogging and Chinese Noodles.
The only times I have been social and met new people after leaving the JWs was when I started a regional Tori Amos fan club. Since you live in Illinois, if you're a Tori Amos fan, you can join too! Or maybe you can find another local group that is into the same things you are into. It might be hard to walk into a new place and look at a bunch of new faces, but once you break the ice it is SO worth it.Actually, I have no problem talking to people. I've been to the Buddhist Meet Up in Chicago and was basically the moderator at the table. I just don't see people on a continual basis. Plus, I'm hideous.
If you need any help finding or starting a social group in your area, let me know. I'll help as much as I can.
All kidding aside, that sounds cool. We should have an Illinois Apostafest one of these days. I know a couple people who might come.
Many Thanks,
Bradley
Logan life is a learning curve, a lot of what you shared is focusing on the past, at age 27 you have a long future before you where you can rebuild friendships outside of a cult, reflect on family history and find coping strategies, and jerk off until your hearts content without any guilt. I would say refocus on these things though I wouldnt want to undermime the things you have suffered in the past.
Brummie
But as you are so often in want to tell me "the Emperor wears no clothes"...
Stephoness is in your age bracket, and interested in helping <nudge, nudge, wink, wink>.
I hope she know's what she's let herself in for, with that offer - hehehe.
Meanwhile I think you should book a flight to Dallas, weekend after next, and come hang with us!!!
Maybe your mum would spring for the flight, given that you'd be going to see a bearded Scot
It does seem to come back to the age-old problem of thinking about things too much, leading to incapacitating yourself.
You're a good guy, Bradley. Don't sell yourself short.
If you'd take the leap of faith required to set aside the "intellectualism" for a minute and truly live in the moment, let your hair down, and dare to embarrass yourself, I suspect you'd suddenly find that life takes on a whole new perspective.
So often the problem is not our circumstances but how we perceive them. Not that which is without, but rather the way we deal with it within.
Whichever way you tackle it, it'll all come out in the wash.
Best wishes,
Ross.
