red,
you are under no obligation to meet with those clowns. I would not give them the time of day. They are much more fun to play with after you are long gone.
friend getting DFed tonight and my upcoming meeting....
by red so deep 23 Replies latest jw experiences
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Gerard
Hey Red! it's not about answering the questions, it's about questioning the answers.
Freedom to you.
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simplesally
Why bother to admit your doubts to them???
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PurpleV
Your poor friend, why is she going to that meeting? Is her parents going to make her attend while she's DF? This is messed up.
She's lucky to have you.
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red so deep
ugh...she's going to the meeting because if she wants to get reinstated later, she heard that being there at your disfellowshipping "displays humility". yeah, humbly subjecting yourself to the decision of the holy spirit (i.e dumbass elders who had it in for her anyways)
i just feel an obligation to explain myself to these elders, not because they're elders, but because they've been good friends to me and my family since i can remember....
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unbeliever
i just feel an obligation to explain myself to these elders, not because they're elders, but because they've been good friends to me and my family since i can remember....
They will only be your friend as long as you are one of them. One sniff of apostacy out of you and they will turn on you in a second. Remember that. You owe them NOTHING. Don't feel guilty.
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Narkissos
rsd,
I'm sorry for all this stupid and unnecessary pain the both of you are going through.
Just a word of caution: think of the consequences before meeting with the elders. Don't open your heart too much because you trust in some individuals. When they act as elders, they are nothing but the cogs of a terrible machinery. In a couple of hours an "encouragement meeting" can become a "judicial committee" which df's you. If you feel you cannot practically or emotionally afford that at the moment, be very careful and don't speak about your doubts. Don't comment on what happened to your friend. Say you have been tired, depressed, discouraged or whatever, and you are sad about what happened, but nothing more. Then you can do your fade as you feel like.
Of course if you decide to "come out" it's a different story.
Take care.
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gumby
Red so Deep,
I do not know your backround such as how much of your family/friends are witnesses.....but as was mentioned, you may want to think about the consequences of being shunned by them especially if you were real close to them and they are a big part of your life. You will not have that any longer and many who are DFed and have to deal with this, have a pretty rough time.
If your intresting in leaving but not facing the consequences...you might want to read some threads concerning those that have "faded"....and how they went about it.
Good Luck in whatever you choose.
Gumby
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Nicodemus
Red,
Check your mailbox on this site
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red so deep
gumby and narkissos, you're advice really gives me something to think about. i might have been a little hasty in deciding to come forward with doubts at this meeting. i really want to stick up for what i believe in, but at the same time, in this organization, the consequences for that can be disastrous. if i can fade and keep it somewhat under the radar, that seems to be the best way to go, but i'm not exactly sure how to go about it....