Positive about jw

by one 78 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Narkissos

  It's a very hard topic to discuss calmly on any xJW board, but I think it is worth it.

  I for one have kept a lot of good memories of my JW time, especially of very nice people I dearly loved.

  In a more general way, I would agree with Wildhorses' comment about racism. And I would extend it to the JWs' stance on nationalism and war. Even though I don't (and deeply didn't) agree with the motives for such a stance, I must admit that it kept me in the organisation in spite of my doubts for some time. Another nice thing was to live in a community of people in which you could practically trust anybody. I know there are many counterexamples but I just didn't happen to be personally disappointed in personal relationships.

  Now does that outweigh the horrors of the system (mind control, blood policy, dfing, shunning, etc.)? Certainly not. But I think the positive has to be acknowledged all the same. At the very least with a view to communication efficiency: when you tell people who do have some positive experience in their belief system and community that everything in it is wrong and rotten, they just cannot believe you.
• 

  vitty

  I stopped smoking, unfortunatly this was one of the things that convinced my husband it was the

  truth idiot. He though nothing would make me give up the weed

  But then I started drinking, gave up on bad substance for one I could have. One the whole I think its safer to smoke.
• 

  one

  Mrsjones5,

  this is not a putdown but did ya read my post honey?

  i did read your post

  no "putdown"?, thanks but if intented will have no effect on me.

  like i said whatever positives things the jws have or do, me and mine can find elsewhere and not have to deal with the negatives exclusive to the jws.

  Some time ago it was not possible or very hard to find "elsewhere". some of the positives things the jw had and did, or may still may have and do.

  By contrast jw did brough positive things to the homes and teached it for free etc

  If you did found the positive "elsewere" you were lucky,

  can you share how you did it?

  Now we have the internet where we can find and learn about the positive things we did learn form jw, but not all.

  but as i said i have not seen replicated the internacional and interracial community i witnessed in the jw group and other things you can only learn or experience by association, not virtual association.

  what you said above really didnt have too much to do with what i expressed.

  then i take you have been a lucky one

  and by the way I educated myself about the lies of the watchtower before the internet ever came my way. not a good thing to assume honey

  .

  i am not assuming anything about you in particular, but things about jw educated us could not be easily found "elsewhere", if you did you are an exception.

  Let me repeat for "emphasis" many of the positive things about the jw were not readly available "elsewhere", free classes and inexpensive books about rethorics, public speaking, argumentation, history, religions, family relationship, social issues, how to read and write, advise about health, housekeeping, etc etc were some of them.

  Due to such hard to find info that was distributed they were highly respected. As a child i remember business people accepting "literature" just because it was cheap, easy to read instructive and practical.

  The only other well known was readers digest magazine, but it was merely a publication, not a org engaged in reaching people, which did not come close to the vast amount of info in wt "literature".

  oh wow, all of sudden i have become a jw apologist, i better start running.
• 

  one

  It's a very hard topic to discuss calmly on any xJW board, but I think it is worth it.

  hurt feelings are hard to overcome

  but if you have not been hurt personally, most likely you would come up with a positive balance for being jw, most posters here have been hurt, including me.

  On the other hand we choosed the path that led to negative balance, no one can force you. We choosed not to read anyother books, including 'neutral' books..What for? wt books were much cheaper, so in many cases to save a few dollars we did no even look at them. Dont know what to say if you had a free library nearby.

  BTW books about cults were rare i believe, and most of us were adapted to the religion and found no real need to look "elsewhere".

  When i buy an important and expensive product and it is demostrated that it was a bad product, it is my fault for first not doing research, a consumer publication etc, (the Pinto car is cheap and can give 40 miles per galllons and there i go)

  chickens, vietnam. "hell no we wont go" but the jw said that first.

  i did no use any kind of drugs, why?, what were the possibilites if my famiily was Catholics?, I dont want to think about it.
• 

  Narkissos

  One,

  I was hurt too: when I was df'd I fully experienced the negative side of the "brotherhood".

  I admit my responsibility in it. I "chose" it in a way. But "responsibility" and "choosing" don't mean the same thing to everyone. I became a JW at age 13 with a large part of my family. My "choice" was not exactly the choice made by my father who was over 40 at that time. The "choice" of a child "born in the truth" is still another.
• 

  one

  Markissos

  I became a JW at age 13

  I was baptized at 12. In my late teen i decided to step out, not because of any doctrine in particular, but mostly because of rules which did not make any sense such reporting field service. I had been already part of judicial comitee and voted for dumping at least one, unrepented publisher.

  I went back and married a decent jw, i could not find anything better, the "world" did not make, and still doesn't, any sense to me. The girls outside the org scared me, i could not accept, and still dont, their standards for a serious relationship. .

  My wife assumed a childish attitude and refused to see what was happening. She asked for the divorce after we separated. Have been out most of my adult life and dont regret. I have sufficient experience outside to tell the positives and negative thngs about jw without strong feelings.

  btw

  most of the problems and hurt feelings i noticed in the org were because elders did not followed written wt instructions and made up their own rules.

  Then as an org the wt does the same any other org does, support the managers, cover up if neccesary.

  How long have you been out?
• 

  Wild_Thing

  I went back and married a decent jw, i could not find anything better, the "world" did not make, and still doesn't, any sense to me. The girls outside the org scared me, i could not accept, and still dont, their standards for a serious relationship.

  Perhaps you should stop trying to find happiness within an organized group of people. Be your own person. Just because a few girls outside the org scared you and do not live up to your standards does not mean the whole world is evil and has the same standards. Respectfully speaking, it seems to me that you still suffer from the black and white thinking exhibited by most JWs.

  Are you of the opionion that the Witnesses primarily have the truth, but are just run by imperfect humans? I get that impression from some of your posts.

  Also, you seem to express a lot of insight into exJWs. I am wondering if these ideas were formed from only your own persepective, from your observations from other exJWs in real life (I am curious as to how many you have known), or from your observations from exJWs online.

  Have ever tried to focus on the postitives in the world of humankind? I think you will find much greater success!
• 

  one

  Perhaps you should stop trying to find happiness within an organized group of people.

  What make you think i am trying to find happines? I found that a long long time ago.

  Be your own person. Just because a few girls outside the org scared you and do not live up to your standards does not mean the whole world is evil and has the same standards.

  I did not say "whole" world is "evil".

  Respectfully speaking, it seems to me that you still suffer from the black and white thinking exhibited by most JWs.

  I see no reason, and you dont provide any, why you make such statement.

  Are you of the opionion that the Witnesses primarily have the truth, but are just run by imperfect humans? I get that impression from some of your posts.

  you got the wrong impression, everyone here has left a "paper trail", you can check to confirm any "impression"

  In my case right on this thread you could get your impression unconfirmed, read it completly. .

  Also, you seem to express a lot of insight into exJWs. I am wondering if these ideas were formed from only your own persepective, from your observations from other exJWs in real life (I am curious as to how many you have known), or from your observations from exJWs online.

  Have ever tried to focus on the postitives in the world of humankind? I think you will find much greater success!

  In this thread i am 'focused' in the title of the topic, but yes i have done what you suggest, not to find success as i already had success achiving most of my goals.

  My participation on this board is related to achiving a new goal, there is always one ahead of me.
• 

  one

  Also, you seem to express a lot of insight into exJWs. I am wondering if these ideas were formed from only your own persepective, from your observations from other exJWs in real life (I am curious as to how many you have known), or from your observations from exJWs online.

  All of the above . Btw the greatest apostate of modern time, as per jw perception, is my personal friend...
• 

  Midget-Sasquatch

  Mustang

  I grew up as a jw but at the same time because my mom didn't convert right away I went to roman catholic schools. Where I lived the sacrament of confirmation was done in grade 7, and while I myself didn't go through it, I was taught all the prep material along with the class. Its believed that it came into being when local priests were given the duties to baptize and then when the bishop visited the church, he'd perform a second anointing of those baptized as a confirmation.

  You're right on about the spiritual meaning given to it. Its a confirmation of the person's baptism and what that initiation entailed. The person is confirming their wish to be part of the church of God and to be followers of Christ. Its about affirming the christian identity when they're old enough to understand the basic tenets of the faith. The sacrament is said to give one a closer tie to God/Jesus, the Church, a fuller bestowing of the gifts of the Holy Spirit, as well as one being better able to defend the faith, or at least receiving more strength and determination to live it. The Bishop normally conducts the sacrament and it has a person being sprinkled with holy chrism (holy oil). They were encouraged to take on a confirmation name for themselves to emphasize the point about taking on this other christian identity.

  Not sure what else I can tell you. It was a long time ago. Everyone was urged to wear white if I remember correctly. At least I remember seeing alot of pictures with my male schoolmates in silky white suits and every body was comparing who was more queer looking...for once I wasn't in the running.