Fuming, Angry, seething, seeing RED!!!!!!!!!!

by Gill 102 Replies latest watchtower scandals

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  Effervescent

  OMG Gill... Your story is horrifying. I can't even wrap my brain around that. It makes me put my own experiences in perspective a bit.

  I have to say that I never really made the connection that this was a wide-spread JW problem. I left church and home at 17 so up to that point I don't think I noticed the level of discipline that was taking place at assemblies and meetings. I DO know however, that my own father, who was incidently an elder, would regularly beat my brothers and I with a thick paddle when we screwed up (or not). It was very methodical, and now looking back... sadistic. Go to the couch, bend over it and hold onto the back and wait for him to come with the paddle. Then he'd come with the paddle and wack us until we started screaming, and after. Most times I ended up with bruises up my back and down my legs. The congregation was WELL aware that this was going on, I specifically remember before a book study at our house the paddle being shown off. I remember some there being obviously uncomfortable and shocked. I can also remember at different times people expressing sympathy at my home life and how my brothers and I were treated, even some saying that they wished they could "take us".

  I think its interesting to think of the mixed bag of attitudes towards discipline back then. But what strikes me is even when people were horrified that children were being abused, they never did a thing to help. I couldn't imagine raising my own sweet children in a group that by its silence advocates gross abuse of its own treasures.

  Its already been alluded to- but it would make me very happy to see this issue the next wave for a "Silent Lambs" type movement.
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  Dragonlady76

  First let start by saying I have ADD. I have a hard time staying still and concetrating. My parents became JW's when I was 5. I remember in vivid horrific detail having to sit still through the 2 hour long meetings, if I didn't sit still looking forward towards the platform, my mom would pinch the living f**k out of me or punch my thigh right there in the chair during service, I always had bruises. I remember the mature sisters telling my mom that it was important to not spare the rod,so that I would be respectful to Jehovah at the meetings .The torture I endured has left me very bitter towards the org.

  I just could not stay still, and of course your parents could not bring any toys or books to keep you busy, you were there to listen to the word of Jehovah. I hated going to the meetings but I did not act up to much as I knew if I did my mom would do more than spank me when we got home. I cannot stand to see people hit or spank their kids, when I see this in public I make sure the persons sees the look of revulsion and disdain on my face. I have a 20 month old son and I do not spank him, and I never will.Spanking does not teach kids to behave, it only teaches them to fear you. A timeout or a loss of privliges will do better to teach a child about the consequences of bad behavior. Babies are innocent and helpless and we as parents have a duty to treat our babies with love, understanding and comapssion. Anyone who hits a baby needs to be in jail.

  Dragonlady76
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  jeanniebeanz

  Children are fodder for the organization, to be broken like horses and made to pull the plow for the society.

  It makes me embarrased and sad that I was ever a part of this group. That's how I raised mine, but fortunately, was able to get them out with me...

  J
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  Big Dog

  I remember about six months ago my sister came to visit (she is a die-hard dub married to a Super Elder) and my daughter was going through the throes of the terrible twos. So I have my hands full and I am doing the time outs and so on and I catch this look on my sisters face. So I ask her what she's thinking and she tells me that my methods are a joke and that my child is going to end up being a monster. So I say, what should I do with her instead, I ask, what did you do with your two boys (her sons are both grown and at Bethel which is a whole nother story). She replies and I quote "we beat them" when they acted up. Not paddled, not spanked but the word "beat". I just sort of looked at her funny and said like "uh huh" and carried on while another piece of the puzzle about her family and why her boys are the way they are fell into place.
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  avishai

  ((((Gill)))

  I also went through some pretty bad stuff at the hands of extended family, . Ever get beat up by dub baby sitters? I got beaten so badly at six after I screamed at them for beating up my one yr. old epilepti. brother that i threw up. My mom said if they touched me again she'd kill them.

  Why did'nt anyone step up when you saw these things happen at the hall? If you saw an adult getting beaten that badly in the kingdom hall surely you'd do something?
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  diamondblue1974

  Gill, Crumpet you have my sympathies you really do.

  I have similar 'fond' memories however I felt extremely lucky and to some extent I still do and this is because even though i had the sh*t beat out of me as a kid there was one boy who got it much worse.My mother was strict but I dont doubt she loved me in the slightest she was simply weak and misguided in her endeavours to do whats best, even now she openly regrets some of the things she did and cant apologise enough.

  Both my mother & I stayed with a brother and sister once (as a favour for letting them stay for an assembly one summer) and they had three kids, a lad my age or thereabouts and two younger brothers little sh*ts.

  I think I was 10 at the time and i remember the horrible atmosphere there was in the house, they were quite well off in comparison to my upbringing but the kids ate cornflakes with water for breakfast every bloody day...(a vivid memory urghh ).

  I remember the two younger brothers were at the age they were into everything if I am to be honest they were just kids. The eldest brother (who i think was called Ian) and me went to play football round the front. After a decent game we came back and two other kids had got a little dirty but none were hurt they simply had found an upturned boat and had been playing pirates...(another vivid memory). His mother decided to call the other two in and they refused saying they were having fun.

  I remember the following events like it happened yesterday as opposed to 20 years ago: she turned to Ian (who had come in and said nothing) and slapped him....I remember feeling the sense of injustice, even my mother looked shocked and tried to help to resolve the issue. When his father came home he near enough dragged him up the stairs and fetched his belt (which i think had a name!!!) and beat the shit out of this poor lad...i remember the screams and the multiple times he was beaten at this point. This happened on a daily occurence or when his two brothers did anything wrong. Yes he got a beating every time his brothers missbehaved, how crap is that.

  I would love to meet his parents now, I really would...I would have plenty to say, believe me.

  So whilst I abhor spanking to this degree I do feel I was lucky, lucky in the sense that I didnt suffer like Ian did.

  What do you think?
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  whyamihere

  I was spanked at the meetings alot!

  I was a kid and I did what kids do! My mother would bring the "Stick" and keep it in her purse! If she picked up her pusre that was your one and only warning. I was beat so hard I would put my hands infront of my ass and plead I wont talk anymore and I will sit still. I would beg her to spank me with her hands because it did not hurt as bad. She said once it hurt her hands when she would spank me and thats why she used the "Stick"!

  I would fear her and love her at the sametime. I learned a lesson and that is to not spank my kids!

  Brooke
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  diamondblue1974

  I would fear her and love her at the sametime. I learned a lesson and that is to not spank my kids!

  I remember such notions myself, I firmly believe that if my partner and I are blessed with kids then they will be as far as I am able, free from all the hangups witness children have to contend with, they will be taught to be sociable as kids should be (unlike most JW kids), and more importantly they will have a voice and their personality will not be crushed as are most other JW kids.

  That I have learned at least.
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  whyamihere

  My kids will grow up loving me and knowing they can come to me for any big or small problem.

  After being beat over and over at the meetings and at home I could never go to my Mom. I remember forgetting my GYM Shoes once at school and getting beat for that! I hate those memories! The many many memories. I hated feeling scared to go to my own mother for anything.

  Brooke
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  Valis

  They take their full share in seeing that their children remain quiet during congregation meetings. If their baby starts to cry, or their child becomes boisterous, they in their turn will take it outside for appropriate discipline.

  *** Watchtower 1988 March 1 pp.23-27 Responsible Childbearing in This Time of the End ***

  Responsible Childbearing in This Time of the End